Advice please nervous rider :)

Munners

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So I've owned three horses, each one unsuitable, bought as a novice ride all three turned out not to be, I've been thrown off umpteen times and to say my nerves are shot is an understatement!! So I have on Saturday a lovely 15'2 coloured Irish cob coming,I've ridden her several times, hacked in company/alone/jumped etc. she's been vet checked and ridden by friends I'm quite confident she is everything I want. My question is where do I start? Do I concentrate on riding straight away? Or grooming and getting to no her. I don't have a ménage so it's difficult to lunge with the ground being so hard. Even though I no she's a lovely mare my nerves are still getting the better of me, any advice will be appreciated :)
 

Summer pudding

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How about getting to know her on the ground first...handling, grooming etc no pressure, and as you grow in confidence you will want to hop on and ride her when the time is right. Btw could you then have a lesson on her? I am very envious..my nerves are shot to pieces so I ride at a riding school every week, and feel nervous every time I get on, but elated when I get off and book another lesson. Good luck, enjoy your new horse.
 

Munners

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How about getting to know her on the ground first...handling, grooming etc no pressure, and as you grow in confidence you will want to hop on and ride her when the time is right. Btw could you then have a lesson on her? I am very envious..my nerves are shot to pieces so I ride at a riding school every week, and feel nervous every time I get on, but elated when I get off and book another lesson. Good luck, enjoy your new horse.
Thankyou :) yes I have bought her off my instructor who sourced her especially for me!! I will have a private lesson once a week, I'm so excited but very nervous at the same time I think I just put too much pressure on myself xx
 

Summer pudding

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Sounds like you have done absolutely everything possible to get the right horse, now relax and take everything one step at a time...and don't beat yourself up and be so hard on yourself. It would be really nice to have an update as you go along - very envious....GOOD LUCK, have fun!
 

Munners

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Sounds like you have done absolutely everything possible to get the right horse, now relax and take everything one step at a time...and don't beat yourself up and be so hard on yourself. It would be really nice to have an update as you go along - very envious....GOOD LUCK, have fun!
Oh thank you that's really given me a boost I will certainly update as we go along xx
 

noblesteed

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As someone who bought their first horse then lost their confidence completely, the best piece of advice I can give is to try and keep in your head that horses are meant to be FUN. Take your time and DON'T let anyone pressure you into doing anything you're not ready to do. Ignore any comments you might get, or advice from people who aren't genuine. Remember there's no rush to do anything til you're ready. You have years of fun ahead of you and your beastie, so taking your time to build a good relationship will only make things better in the long run. I had a year of tears, trouble and hospital visits with my horse, but 5 years on he's just fantastic and I really regret listening to those people in the beginning who didn't have my best interests at heart.
 

Pearlsasinger

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Take as much time as you need to get to know your new horse before attempting to ride. Remember that no matter how good she is, she will be unsettled by the move, she will need time to learn to trust you, just as you will need time to learn to trust her. When you do start riding, do a short hack in trusted company, in walk and build up from there. Start within your comfort zone and don't try to push yourself too far, too fast.
Enjoy!
 

Micky

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One other thing you could do is get your husband/friend to come out with you on your first couple of hacks/rides, just as a back up for confidence, either on foot or bicycle :). I did this when getting my 1st horse and was nervous though more than capable ( I suspect like you) and it helped enormously...good luck and take your time, hum when you ride to help you breathe, ( rather than sing badly as i did :D )
 

Cortez

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Just be sure that when you do ride the horse is not too fresh and has had plenty of turnout/energy burn-off. Also make sure you are not overfeeding; this causes so many problems for novice/nervous riders.
 

jendie

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Good luck with your new horse, it sounds as though you've done everything possible to ensure everything will go well.

Just an idea though, would it be possible to keep the horse at livery, maybe where you instructor works? You would then probably have the use of a school, which would be a good place to build up your confidence. You'd also have the support of others on the yard and that can help put any minor problems into perspective.
 

lornaA

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I would arrange a lesson with your instructor the first few times you ride her even if you have 2 or 3 lessons the first week just to get you started off. Good luck x
 

oldie48

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Hi expect to feel nervous the first time you ride, cos you will be. Keep well within your comfort zone, ride in company with people you trust to keep you safe. Have as many lessons as you can afford, they will help to keep your confidence levels up. Know you will have the occasional setback and accept it's just a setback, not the end of the world. be confident that you are on an exciting journey that won't always be smooth but is worth travelling. Don't listen to people who make you feel bad, they are all around you and are not worth a second thought. Enjoy your horse and the whole experience, owning a riding a horse is really special and you are lucky to have that opportunity. Let us know how you get on.
 

Circe

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I've had ( still have sometimes ) confidence issues, so I know how you feel.
I think the biggest thing is not to put any pressure on yourself. If all you want to do is sit on your horse for 5 mins then get off, that's fine.
Quite often I ll decide I'm just going to do a lap of the arena each way in walk, then once I'm doing it we progress to a hack or full schooling session. The good thing is though, if I do have a wobble and want to get off after a little walk around, i can because that was all I had planned to do.
I think Kelly marks book perfect confidence is good as well.
For you op, if you want to take a month before getting on then do that,
I'd probably have a lesson or two in the first week or two and take it from there.
Have someone with you or phone someone and say you'll call again in say 30 mins when you get off.
Oh, I'm a big fan of rescue remedy as well.
Kx
 
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