Advise please

[TicTac]

I haven't had my mare very long. I bought her in May of this year to replace my wonderful gelding who had to be PTS due to an injury.

She is KWPN registerd, 8 years old and has impeccable breeding. Very sweet nature, good to catch, box shoe etc. She can be nappy if hacked on her own but is fine in company. As she can be a little slow to respond to my leg ( she is certainly not dead to it but responds in her own good time sort of thing) I put on a pair of small spurs to school her today.. She certainly went well for a short while, forward and soft into the contact but in between, ears back and throwing in the odd big buck. I ignored this behaviour and worked on transitions. However she would still buck. When I put her into canter I got a couple of nice circuits untill she suddenly took off and bucking big time. I eventually hit the deck. once up and dusted off, I took the spurs off and got back on and she was fine( yes I plucked up courage to canter) but hard work!

I am a middle aged woman who has owned horses all my life. I am a good rider and experienced. I know that when the horse was cantering round and she was bucking my leg obviously wasn't as still as it should have been and I more than likely annoyed her with the spur. However I have now slightly lost my confidence and am wondering if she is the horse for me and I am thinking that I should sell he on. She has no faults other than the hacking out alone, yet she will if she can follow some body. Usually my husband.

I want an easy life. I spend all my spare time and money on my horses and hacking is a big part of it. You folks on here are always so encouraging and brutally honest too, can I have your thoughts please. Thank you

 

[Booboos]

Sorry you have had a fall! That kind of thing is bound to dent anyone's confidence, but if, as you say, it happened because of the spurs, eliminating the spurs should eliminate the problem. Some horses are just too sensitive for spurs and perhaps she would react better with a tap of the whip or small nudges with the leg (no spur)? Good on you for getting back on!

It does sound though as if the hacking alone is a problem as well. This can be quite an obstacle to overcome and may dent your confidence further but, under other circumstances, e.g. if you always have someone to hack out with, it's not a problem at all. Is it the hacking alone that is more of a problem and making you think of selling her?

 

[jesterfaerie]

IMO if you feel deep down that hacking is something you really want to be able to do alone from the word go and do not want to have to spend the time and efford to get your mare hacking out well yourself (I know how fustrating it is and sometimes I wish I could swop mine for something who I don't have to constantly work with) then I would look for something that is more suitable.
But as you said she only has that one problem, how would you feel about the whole thing is she was good to hack out?

You haven't had her very long you will still be trying to get to grips with each other and from the way you described your gelding (RIP) it sounds like your mare has a big hole to fill. I would have a serious think about it, because you may sell her in hopes of finding something that will hack out well but may have a little problem somewhere else.
But if you really feel that you and your confidence would be better with another horse then go with your gut instict.

 

[MizElz]

She may have very tickly sides! I once tried a horse who was so ticklish that you could not carry a whip on him, could never wear spurs and couldnt even do more than squeeze with your legs. I made the mistake of kicking him on the approach to a fence, and he bucked me right off!

Ellie also hates spurs - sounds similar to your mare. I have a pair of dummy spurs that I used for dressage last year, and she just about tolerates them, but when I first got her, at the slightest touch of a spur she would buck, then rear, then buck again until she got you off. I would leave them off whenever you ride her next - if this was the first time you had used them, I'd say she may have had a nasty experience at some point, so it really isnt worth fighting with her and risking losing your confidence. How is she when you carry a whip? Ellie does not like my schooling whip, so I have a very short jockey-style stick that I can just tap her on the neck with if I need her to move forwards more. It works fine - I hope this may help you and your girlie!

 

[MyBoyChe]

Hi, cant really advise on how to help with your mare, assume you've had all usual checks done etc, but I just wanted to say that I was in a similar position earlier this year. I am in my forties, ridden since I was 5, owned several horses over the years but just got back into things after a break of 8 years. I bought a 9 yr old warmblood mare simply as a happy hack. She and I just didn't click, still not sure if it was me or her or a bit of both. It got to the point where I was dreading getting on her and I made the decision to send her back to the dealer and try to find something more suitable, like you I want a quiet life, we have fantastic off road hacking where we live and being out in the countryside with my horse is the biggest part of what I do, like you I also spend all my spare time and cash on my horse and just want to enjoy the time I have with him. I have been lucky and have found the most beautiful TB, an ex racer who is everything I wanted, a very gentle loving boy who is happy being hacked out alone, very easy and kind in the stable and field and an absolute pleasure to look after. I have had him for 8 weeks now and already feel we have formed a bond. I did feel guilty about giving up on the mare but at the end of the day I wasn't enjoying her, didn't feel safe riding out and didn't ever feel we were forming any sort of bond( I had her for 3 months). My point I suppose is that only you know what is right for you, if you are happy to persevere, 4 months is no time really to get used to each other, you may find that things sort themselves out and you'll look back and wonder why you ever thought about selling her. However, I think that sometimes you just know it's not working and it's better to accept it than make yourself unhappy. Good luck with whatever you decide.

 

[TicTac]

You guys are great, Thank you. Generally the mare is no problem at all to school etc. I would say that her only fault, apart from not hacking out alone is that she can throw in a big buck be it out of nappiness or like today, when feeling the spur. She just stood over me when I hit the floor!

I have only had a for 4 months and I would say that on the whole she is a very amenable mare who has her moments as all horses do, and yes she has four very special hooves to live upto! I don't generally sell my horses, but work through the probelms as I think she has been pushed from pillar to post because of the nappiness.

I am due for another lesson soon and will chat with her as well as soaking in the bath tonight with a glass of wine to sip things over lol

 

[lachlanandmarcus]

Its horrid when youve got a horse and you want it to be for keeps but they challenge you in ways that give cause for thought!

But to me it sounds like you are capable and willing to work through the issues with her, and you are probably going to succeed and win through.

good luck with her, there isnt a wrong decision here but I feel you will make it ))