Am I being too clingy ?

[Bettyboo222]

I have been told that I am too clingy.

As some of you know I loan a veteran pony. After bonfire night I asked the owner to text me that everything was ok as B gets panicky , when she didn't I text her. Also if I haven't been able to go up for a few days due to exams, illness ect I text the owner every 2-3 days to check on B. Do you guys honestly think this is clingy ?

 

[ThePony]

No, every 2 - 3 days is hardly stalkerish! If I was loaning a pony to someone I would like them to keep up with it's well being - shows you are caring and give a damn about it!

 

[LaurenM]

No I don't see it as clingy. It shows that you care about B.

If it was the owner that said it though, they may feel like they are being under-estimated? Not sure though, I would be chuffed that someone cared enough about mine

 

[Enfys]

Sorry, honest answer, Yes.

Has the loanee said anything, or is this just how you feel?

The fireworks thing, that's fine, for the first few weeks also fine, horses take time to settle, but every 2 or 3 days, that would drive me (personally) mad. I'd feel as if you didn't trust me, and I would be wondering if loaning was actually right for you. Every couple of weeks I (as the loanee) would expect to send you an update be it a text or email that would be normal.

Sorry.

 

[LaurenM]

Just to clarify, are you the owner or the loanee?

 

[Vodkagirly]

How long has she been looking after the horse? If its less than a month and still settling in then fair enough - if its longer then your being a bit clingy. Unless there is an issue I would of thought once a week was loads.

 

[ThePony]

Ah, I assumed you were the loanee. If you are the owner then I would find it a little much to be honest.

 

[Spit That Out]

It shows as an owner that you care about your pony and it's welfare whilst it's out on loan.

There are so many people who put their horses and ponies out on loan and then seem to forget about them and then shocked when the loan home wants to return the animal and the state that they are returned in. If they had kept in contact with the loan home they may have realized that the loan wasn't working and could have got the horse or pony home before it turned in to a welfare case!!!

However maybe leave the texts to a couple a week or get the pony back and ask for a loan that will come to the yard your on so you can keep an eye on them.

Just because your pony is on loan doesn't mean you've washed you hands of him. Keep in touch but maybe also give your loan home a chance to enjoy the pony rather than answering your text messages!!

 

[Bettyboo222]

I should of made it clear, I part loan B.

 

[Honey08]

Yes. Very very clingy! Sorry!

Every two to three weeks would be clingy enough! Either you want to loan the horse out to someone that you TRUST and HAVE CHECKED OUT already, or you want to keep it yourself, and perhaps have a sharer. Yes keep an eye, and visit now and again, but really, when you loan out a horse its their horse in a way, and you have tao back off a bit.. If I was them I'd have sent you the pony back by now!

 

[LaurenM]

Ah! What I said initially then!

 

[Spudlet]

That would drive me bonkers, sorry... I mean, check up every few weeks or months for sure, but I would feel I was being constantly checked up on, and that you didn't feel I was good enough for your pony.

And if you are the loaner (sorry, not totally sure from your post!) and I was the owner, I'd have given you the push by now!

Sorry, I mean communication is great, but I think you need to relax a little!