An apology to my yard owner
- Thread starter WestCoast
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As a horse owner (particularly as its your first horse), you aren't doing anything wrong by asked for other people's advise.
Why is she bothered about you asking for advice? I don't remember you saying anything bad about your yard or anything...
I'm afraid you have no need to apologise. You can ask what you like about your horse on here. You haven't identified the yard or the yard owner either.
Oh dear. It's always wise to assume anyone you refer to may read posts on here. 
Especially if you have photos and use your own name.
Someone at my previous yard (which was lovely, and I'd never said otherwise) announced out of the blue that they were "irritated" by my posts on HHO. It made me very conscious that this is a popular forum and we can be recognised.
Especially if you have photos and use your own name.Someone at my previous yard (which was lovely, and I'd never said otherwise) announced out of the blue that they were "irritated" by my posts on HHO.
It made me very conscious that this is a popular forum and we can be recognised.Yes that is true Fiona but I don't think Paula has said anything bad about the yard or yard owner.
As for that person saying your posts irritated. What a cheek!
As for that person saying your posts irritated. What a cheek!
blimey we all need a second opinion sometimes and a bit of advice no matter how much of an expert we think we are...
Although I know Paula was very distressed at the time, I do remember her being upset with her yard on a recent thread about Bree's mouth problems, and being prompted by people here to move yards. I can imagine if I'd read that as a YO I could have felt quite hurt.
And yeah! Who could believe I could be irritating?
And yeah!
Who could believe I could be irritating? 
I hate these "I'm being watched and controlled" type threads.
Fair play if you genuinely need to apologize but this sounds a bit off to me.
Fair play if you genuinely need to apologize but this sounds a bit off to me.
I didn't see the OPs thread so cannot comment on it, but I would broadly agree with what you say Flame.
However, as a yard owner I do get fed up with the amount of people on here (again, not talking about the OP) who comment on their yards and get told by all and sundry to "move yards asap" when we are only hearing one side of the tale and the YOs in question very rarely get a right of reply.
Doesn't bother me if my liveries ask for advice elsewhere (although with the type of yard I have people are usually bringing horses here FOR my input), but I would be upset if people on this forum were telling them to leave
However, as a yard owner I do get fed up with the amount of people on here (again, not talking about the OP) who comment on their yards and get told by all and sundry to "move yards asap" when we are only hearing one side of the tale and the YOs in question very rarely get a right of reply.
Doesn't bother me if my liveries ask for advice elsewhere (although with the type of yard I have people are usually bringing horses here FOR my input), but I would be upset if people on this forum were telling them to leave
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I've only recently joined this forum, and this is why I stay anonymous on here. My place of work (not where I keep my horses thankfully!) has a strict pecking order. Regardless of my many many years of horse experience, because I'm not one of the 'elite' on the yard, to them I know NOTHING! If they ever clocked me on here they would have great fun patrionising and bullying me!
I think this is a great forum, especially because I don't want to give my colleagues the satisfaction of asking for help or advice
I think this is a great forum, especially because I don't want to give my colleagues the satisfaction of asking for help or advice
this thread illustrated why its a good idea never to use your real name nor your horses nor where you live on the internet. Its even best to not admit that you post on here or anywhere else. You can always say you lurk and read threads .
OP I suggest you contact TFC and change your username to something no-one will recognise you by and use a false name for your horse when posting. Then you can ask anything you like. Also remove any photos of your horse etc.
OP I suggest you contact TFC and change your username to something no-one will recognise you by and use a false name for your horse when posting. Then you can ask anything you like. Also remove any photos of your horse etc.
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I'm not going to quote as it wouldn't be helpful, but I really suggest people read Paula's own comments on her thread about Bree's post-dental work problems before commenting about whether an apology's in order.
I think I'd apologize too tbh!
I think I'd apologize too tbh!
Fiona isn't my real name, but I don't keep it a secret that I post on here. If anyone recognises me, I don't really mind. But I never say anything personal about anyone.
A lot of members use an anonymous second ID to post about anything they think might case upset.
A lot of members use an anonymous second ID to post about anything they think might case upset.
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What a shame you feel compelled to post this. You have named nobody. Hope this isn't the start or the continuance of your YO's interference or control over you. You are a person who has a right to their OWN opinions. You are the paying client for a Service, you are not paying for a direction of what to do or think .
Come back on under a different username to get away from her/him monitoring you via themselves or other liveries. Then think seriously, if you are happy where you are.
Come back on under a different username to get away from her/him monitoring you via themselves or other liveries. Then think seriously, if you are happy where you are.
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Haha, OK Fiona.
Paula you shouldn't be apologizing for asking for advice about your horse, or even for criticizing yard policies if they are the truth, but if you are going to say sorry, say sorry for insulting your YO on the internet!
Paula you shouldn't be apologizing for asking for advice about your horse, or even for criticizing yard policies if they are the truth, but if you are going to say sorry, say sorry for insulting your YO on the internet!
Thank you. I felt like a lone voice there.
Of course asking for advice is fine, anyone would be unreasonable and very controlling to say otherwise. But insulting someone who although not named, is identifiable, isn't really on IMO.
Of course asking for advice is fine, anyone would be unreasonable and very controlling to say otherwise. But insulting someone who although not named, is identifiable, isn't really on IMO.
Everyone on here knows who I am after a few eventful threads
I dont mind though I am quite easy to find on google searches anyway I even seem to have my own google images! :O
I dont post things on here that could ever hurt someone I know personally. I keep it very much my own opinions on trivial things rather that use it to dig and moan at people/yards I know
I dont mind though I am quite easy to find on google searches anyway I even seem to have my own google images! :O
I dont post things on here that could ever hurt someone I know personally. I keep it very much my own opinions on trivial things rather that use it to dig and moan at people/yards I know
Was it the asking advice she didn't like, or the fact you called her a cow and mentioned the 'bloody groom' in your thread?
Arent forums a place to vent?! Surely we're all allowed to do that every now and then. I do feel this is an extenuation of the control on the OP by her yard, from her posts a lot of the time she has been made to feel like her horse isnt her own.......
If the YO felt obliged enough to put pressure on her to make a public apology, then she must have a guilty conscience to my mind.
If the YO felt obliged enough to put pressure on her to make a public apology, then she must have a guilty conscience to my mind.
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Oh dear - didn't realise that, that's a bit off! Perhaps though the YO will take this in her stride and reevalate her attitude to her paying clients and try to soften her approach.
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Which is why I've been suggesting people actually read the thread before commenting.
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very awkward.....easily done if upset/angry though
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I agree with fiona & rhino. Don't think op needs to go so far as to change user names, but perhaps in future it would be well to remember not to post about recognizable people when angry.
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Which is why I've been suggesting people actually read the thread before commenting.
If venting is what people choose to do on here then that's fine. Really it's up to each individual to decide how to use this forum. Some people on here may know who I am in real life, I've not covered anything up however I choose to be picky about what I post. H&H is not a closed forum and is not cut off from the rest of the world, so anyone can read what is written. Think of it as a horse newspaper if you're happy to have your words in print then that's okay.
if you're happy to have your words in print then that's okay.