Another chance? Sorry, a bit long...

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Flicker

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My lad is on restricted turnout and I turn him and his little buddy out in the morning and his field mate's owner (17 year old girl) brings them both in at lunchtime. I discovered 2nd hand over the weekend that she'd left the gate open when she went to get them and my boy got out onto the lane, stood on his lead rope, broke it and went trotting off down the lane. Not a word had been said to me. I phoned her and got the full story, which matched what had been said to me. She didn't seem concerned or apologetic. I mentioned it to her mum and explained that I was disappointed by the fact that her daughter hadn't mentioned it to me, especially since I'd had the vet for a different matter that evening and could have had him checked out at the same time. Also, I had ridden him twice since then and if he had hurt himself from snapping his lead rope, it could have been made worse. Mum was mortified and said that her daughter had told her on the day it happened and said to her 'I won't make that mistake again, mum'.
Now the conundrum I have is whether to keep trusting this girl to bring my horse in. I'm not sure what I will do re: turnout if I don't let her handle my boy anymore, but could make a plan and anything is better than an accident possibly happening. I'd like to give her a second chance, but how do I know she's going to be safe with him. She's a sweet girl, very good with the horses, but just going through teenage issues...
I can't afford a daily bring-in charge and there's nobody else around that I could ask to do it.
What do the famously sensible HHO's think??
 
Sometimes people aren't perfect & they make mistakes, give her a second chance. Surely you've made an error & possibly your horse has broken loose, I know I have? Only one person never made any mistakes & they nailed him on a cross!!
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I agree. Let her carry on bringing him in. You say yourself that she's great with the horses, is a lovely girl etc. She says it won't happen again having learnt from her mistake.

I do appreciate though that it will probably be a while before you stop panicking at bringing in time but that will settle down again over time

Give her the benefit of the doubt.
 
Ease up shes only young and we all make mistakes. As above she was probably feeling guilty and embarrassed and too scared to say anything, in time she will learn that the best thing to do is be upfront about such things how ever difficult it may seem to do so, but at 17 its unlikely to be a lesson shes already learnt.
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hmmm, I know I'm a hoary old dinasaur, BUT this aint no little kiddie of 7 yrs who doesn't know any better. I was brought up in the countryside, and if I'd left a gate open at 7 yrs old would have had a good hiding!! She's 17, and OK might be having "teenage issues" but she needs to know that leaving a gate open isn't just like forgetting to put her eyeshadow on, its serious, very serious. Horses and other livestock could have been seriously endangered by a moment's thoughtlessness.

Perhaps I am coming across as ultra strict, but all the way through Pony Club we were taught the importance of the countryside code and stuff like that, and we would no more have thought of leaving a gate open than we would have thought of joining the anti's.

Bless her, sweet kid and all that, (but 17 aint a kid anymore), but she needs to get her act together a bit I would think.
 
My YO left the gate to my horses field open the other day....she forgot he was in there when going to catch his companion. Shes 37....we all make mistakes! No harm done to my boy, we found him in another field across the track stuffing dairy grass to his hearts content, he was on colic watch that night but at the end of the day he's fine and she 'hopefully' has learnt from the mistake!
 
Blimey MiJodsR2BlinkinTite that's a bit harsh, i'm glad you're not my mum!!
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I do see what you're saying but please, you must have made some mistakes in your life, even if it wasn't related to the countryside code.
I'd give her another chance and encourage her in a nice way to be upfront and honest with you if anything else should happen, you don't want her to be afraid of talking to you. She's already said to her mum she won't do it again. We all make mistakes.
 
If she told her mum and, when prompted, you, exactly what had happened it doesn't sound too bad at all really. I'd simply mention that you'd prefer to be told if anything, however minor, happens again and leave it at that.

At 17 risk perception is different. We all see loads of people on here talking about how much smaller they jump/more company they hack with as they get older, have kids and mature. As far as she knew horse was fine and she'd eventually brought him in as planned. As far as you knew horse could have hurt himself breaking rope/been run over/broken neck tripping on lead rope etc etc.

MiJodsR2BlinkinTite was brought up to understand the importance of certain things. We don't know if this girl was. Although I expect understanding the importance might make some people even less willing to confess their mistakes! I'd expect that if you explain clearly but briefly that this is important to you and that you do need to be told she should respect that and behave accordingly. I'd give her the chance to follow through.
 
my YO (who is 41) forgot to give my mare her hay net at lunch time the other week so she was in from 7.30am until 6.30pm with only a tiny bit of hay that I had left her first thing in the morning. I didn't get cross because no one is perfect and people forget. I would be angry if it happened again (and I do give her more hay when i leave in the mornings now just incase!) but mistakes happen and it's a one off. I would give her another chance.
 
Thanks guys, you have summed up how I was feeling. Yes, she made a serious mistake and error of judgement, but hopefully has learnt a strict lesson. Yes, I will panic a bit for the first couple of weeks, but hopefully she won't let me down again.
 
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