Bad news - Ill be brief but would like some advice

[archoak]

On Sunday my husband of 18 years left us, he has a new partner. It it very important that my sons are happy and supported as they now hate their father. I want to sell our lovely lorry which we only bought last year (W reg iveco all singing and dancing) and buy a 3.5 ton that son can drive, I need somewhere that will do part exchange as don't feel upto all the hassle at the moment

I paid £21,00 last August but know I have to be realistic.

Please if anyone on here can help me I would be very grateful, don't be too nice though as I'm prone to cry.

 

[stencilface]

Wheraboutasare you? I think everyone will know of places local to them that will part ex.

Don't cry, think of the nicer, even shinier wagon you can buy, better than a man, and if theres any money left over (which there should be) buy yourself/son a new horse

 

[Patches]

I can't help with the lorry issue, but wanted to offer you some (((hugs))) and to let you know I'm thinking of you.

My friend had been with her hubby since they were 16 (21 years) and married for 18 too. He has recently left her for another woman. She had no idea there were any problems in their marriage.

I've seen how this has affected her, the shock of it all, and I truly sympathise with you. She's torn between the love she still holds for him and her family slating him at every given opportunity (which he no doubt deserves...but she would have him back in a heart beat).

Six weeks down the line, my friend Sue is slowly starting to pick up the pieces and rebuild her life. I hope the same happens for you.

Good luck.

 

[Eventerlad15]

My step-dad of ten years, walked out on us back in July/August now and we were all very upset too.

We were considering selling out 7.5 ton, but as I have 2 and hope to be doing 3-days its not really possible, had a look around insurance and managed to more than half it! So, that may be worth a try?

Otherwise, i'm not really sure!

 

[archoak]

Thanks all, we only have one horse so it makes sense but think in the current market I'll be needing more money rather than making any

Eventerlad - sorry about your stepdad - my sons know how you feel.

Patches - I definatley won't be takng him back, this is someone he works with that we knew

 

[archoak]

Oh and I'm in St Albans.

 

[Marymary]

Select Horseboxes - Andrew Saywell do 3.5t boxes and I *think* do part ex. I have never had a box from them but I know someone who had a 3.5t from him this summer and been thrilled with it. The Co we use for our lorries do 3.5t and part ex but they are an awful long way from in middle of Wales - Tristar.

So sorry with what you are going through, have had it done to me only difference is there weren't children involved, beleive me you will be better off without the slimy toad he will get his comeuppance...or as my grandmother used to say 'god always pays his debts'.

xxx

 

[Patches]

I wouldn't take mine back either if he did it to me. My friend had never had a bf before she met her hubby, so she's been struggling with imagining life without him (understandably) and would have taken him back in an instant.

Problem with that is that I don't think she fully understood that life couldn't go back to how it was. It would've always been there, between them, affecting her trust of him etc.

I think she's doing ok now. She's turned a corner. It's daunting though. She will be 38 in December and she never imagined starting over again, not after all of these years.

I think she knows the "Other Woman" too, although not very well. Utterly humiliating betrayal. You have my complete sympathy. It took Sue three weeks to give up on asking "Why?" as he couldn't answer her.

 

[eoe]

Soverign have an 05 2 horse that looks quite nice I would try ringing round all the big horsebox dealers, like Oakley, Soverign, Select, Solitaire, Priory Stud etc and see who will do you the best trade in.

Bigs Hugs for you, you will get through it, us women are survivors xx

 

[prudunce]

ah poor you BUT hey,his loss im sure!!!! bl**dy men eh!! he will soon realise he's made huge Booboo,BUT u tell him where to go if he ever comes crying back. U have your son&horse,wat more can a women want eh!
Best of luck,i feel for you

Lifes a bitch at times but think happy thoughts and be positive,try and be around friends/horse's as much as poss to take your mind off things.

 

[Marquire]

So sorry to hear about that.

Try Ascot horseboxes. I'm about to take delivery of a 7.5T from them and I traded in my 3.5T box against it. I am totally gutted to have had to trade it in but my horse hates travelling backwards. It's a 55 plate, 84k miles, purple with silver decals and as new as I had it built for me in August 2008.

Chin up things will work out for you.

Marie x

 

[Mickeymoo]

don't know about the lorry, but you don't want him back.. If he has done it once he can do it again.

Its one strike and your out in my book - kids or no kids.. I was messed about for 7 years, and the only good thing i can see that came from it is that it put me in the right place for when i met my now husband of 12 years.

 

[ColouredFan]

So sorry to hear your news, Big hugs!!!

Would it be worth putting a part ex ad in the horse and hound or simular, stating what you have and that you want to downgrade for a 3.5 tonne and some cash?? When we sold our 3.5 ton we would have been willing to do this. Also put an ad in the lorry window thats how we sold our last lorry.

If you need the money you will be better waiting for things to settle a bit selling yours then buying a 3.5 tonne, you will end up with more money in the end.

 

[wizoz]

Hi, i'm so very sorry for you, men can be such pigs

Your lorry situation has got me thinking, if you are wanting to downsize, i'm not sure that a dealer will PX for the simple reason that they usually want to have money in, not give money out! Plus you would be better off if you sold it privately, as much as this is obviously a pain.

Just my thoughts but I do hope things get better for you soon.

Edited cause i'm thick!

 

[Chloe_GHE]

Hiya sorry no help with the lorry but lots of moral support vibes heading your way, I'm sure a month from now things will look alot better. Hopefully you can dowgrade your lorry and upgrade to a new man (one with monogomy and devotion as factory standard) big hugs to you and the boys xxx

 

[*hic*]

Look at this

Looking at this from a different angle. Is your son 18 or soon to be 18? Would he feel empowered perhaps to take his test to drive between 3.5 tonnes and 7.5 tonnes? It would involve you in some cost but you'd be sticking with a wagon you already know without the hassle of a sale and purchase.

I love this quote from another poster, sorry I can't remember who to attribute it to: A woman is like a teabag, you only know how strong she is when you drop her in hot water. Hoping you soon feel strong enough to stand a spoon up in

 

[Thistle]

Like the quote J2!

Applechaff, just want to say how sorry I am and if I can help in anyway just let me know.

 

[archoak]

You are all so kind, I have been on phone all day sorting out finances and will reply to all pms later xx

 

[Ebenezer_Scrooge]

Nothing practical to add but sending you hugsxx

 

[kerilli]

big hugs and sympathy. be strong.
i'd echo the suggestion of putting an ad in H&H and maybe on Horsequest, with pics of your lorry. there are always people wanting to upsize as well as downsize as their circs and number of horses changes.
very very best of luck.

 

[H_J]

Sending you hugs xx

 

[chester1234]

Big big hugs xx

 

[Groom42]

jemima 2....... original quote came from one Nancy Reagan - SHE knew what she was about!!!! Big hugs and sympathy to Applechaff xxxxxx

 

[Hedgewitch13]

Lol.... that's Jack's_mum's saying - she's been through the mill too but has come out the other side very well

Applechaff - can't help with horsebox advise but will say keep busy and don't give yourself time to mope. You will need to grieve the loss of your relationship though so don't be too hard on yourself for doing that. Big hugs xx

 

[teddyt]

applechaff, cant help with the lorry but financally you would probably be better off selling it privately then buying what you want.

so sorry your husband is putting you and your family through this. Look after yourself, cry if you need to and one day soon you will feel better and realise you deserve better. His selfishness is no reflection on you xx

 

[langside]

lots of hugs to you all xx

 

[cavalo branco]

I can't help with your lorry but am sending you "strong woman" vibes because everything will feel too much to start with, but it WILL get easier. I have been diagnosed with cancer in the last 6 weeks, the shock of a life crisis does hit like an express train but gradually it all settles. At least you can do my lifelong motto "When you are down, saddle up!!!" Thinking of you

 

[lozziehumphreys]

Lots of hugs coming your way xx

 

[tigers_eye]

Very sorry to hear your news. What about Thorpe Horseboxes, their's always looked really smart little trucks.

 

[amandaco2]

i think alexanders take in part exs for 3.5t lorries.
big hugs to you, you poor thing.