Bonding with new horse...

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Jericho

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Had my new loan mare a week and she has been foot perfect, not a nasty bone in her body, hacked out in heavy traffic without batting an eyelid, popped some small fences and did some lovely scholoing in gale force wind and here comes the but....... she seems so uninterested in humans. My two other horses can be quite in your face and follow me round like big dogs, neigh when they see me but she stands at the back of the field and only ever shows interest when food is offered. She seems decidely resigned to life and you can almost see the 'I know I have to do this ' vibe coming off her. She hasnt really responded to any scratching or attempts at bonding so far. I feel quite sorry for her in a way - its like she has a hard life and not really got much back from humans. She looks so timid and meek and really looks as though she would rather be a million miles away (but not in a scared sppoky way!)

I know she was an eventer before me and she lived out in a field of 15 acres most of the time on a large livery yard where she was ridden more or less every day, but her owner is absolutely lovely, really knowledgeable and treated her really well.

Sorry a rambiling post - I am just feeling a little lost with her at the moment. I know its early days.... just interested to know if anyone else has had this with a new horse?
 
Im in the same position at the min, but my new horse is quite nervous with it too. Quite headshy as well.
Is it just a case of bringing her in everyday and making a fuss of them? I found this worked with my old loan horse but he was a gelding, not sure if mares are a bit more aloof anyway?
 
Our old pony when she came to us (from a riding school) had no personallity. She had been brought in and ridden and turned out. She didn't want cuddles or fuss just to be left to her own devices. It took time and patience but eventually as she realised that it was just us who would be handling her, and we wanted to be with her for other reasons than just being ridden her very cheeky personality came out until she started to rule the yard - and us. Give your mare time to adjust, don't crowd her but show her that she isn't just there to be ridden and hopefully she will decide to open up and show her real personality to you.
 
Yep - be patience- it took 18 months with my chap for him to start being a "personality" - little by little he showed some interest in life but it really has been the last 3 weeks that the "cheeky pony" side of him has arrived. It is wonderful to watch him - "test you" to see your reaction.

take it slow, and one day you will think - oh she did not used to do that !
 
My exracer was like this when i got him 18months later and hes realised what its all about and hes not in a strict routine and that humans don't always mean work etc he follows you round the field like a dog and as soon as he sees you hes pacing up and down his field until you go and see him and now hes a real sweetie still prefers his hard feed to you though lol
 
My mare who I have had for 19 years since she was 4 is very independant and has never been 'cuddly' unless there is a treat involved. Most people I know who have mares say they can be like this. My 2yr old gelding is really cuddly but I would say my mare has more respect for me which is more important. They are just like people - some like contact others don't. I would add though that she has a big personality despite the above and a myriad of very telling facial expressions!!
 
some horses are just quite quiet souls, aren't they?
I started with my share horse a few weeks ago, and i was feeling bad that she didn't seem to be interested in me, but then, after two weeks, i was about to walk down the track from the yard to get her from the field, and she spied me and walked straight over to the gate! It was from quite a distance away and other humans had been walking up and down the track since i'd arrived there but she'd ignored them. Oh, it made my heart soar! Even though of course she was only thinking "oh good, there's the mug that will give me my feed", the fact she'd recognised me at all was just great! a nice first step - i'm sure yours will start doing little things like that soon and it will all feel better!
 
It was over a year before my boy realized that I wasn't 'another' groom. He was never really affectionate unless he was poorly - well he was male.

Give it time, I'm sure she'll come out of herself eventually. Very rewarding that first neigh when you walk to the field.

My mare was the same when I first had her, but when I lost my boy I spent hours and hours with her. Totally different horse now, in your face and won't leave you alone. Very affectionate but again that took time.
 
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