Bonding with your horse?

tabithakat64

tabithakat64

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Have you ever had a horse you haven't been able to bond with?

I've never really had this issue before and usually bond really easily with horses.

But I just cannot bond with one of my two project horses, he's well mannered, very talented and tries hard to please, other people don't seem to have this issue with him but if I'm honest he just leaves me a bit cold. :(
 
Took me over 1 1/2 years to bond with my mare - just takes a long time with some!! For us the bond was helped along with alot of ground work and just being around each other last summer when she was off work. I got to know her more and she started coming out of her shell so there was actually something to like!
 
Had a horse on loan with view to buy sure one day (and is hopefully now) making someone very happy but he just left me cold to the point that I didn't even like brushing him. It happens, conflict of personalities.
 
No, but I bought one last year that the previous owners just couldn't get on with.

The mare was very 'switched off' when we first saw her, the owner admitted quite openly that they didn't get on (I think that she was frightened of the mare).

The mare is one of the most affectionate we've ever had, easy to do, well-mannered and absolutely trustworthy. We often say 'How could they not like her?'. Each to their own!

Their loss is our gain. In fact we are fighting off people who want her!
 
Is there something specific that he does that puts you off him...? Or is it just his personality doesn't interest you, you don't like his looks, he reminds you of another horse you didn't click with....I think if you can pinpoint what isn't working it will help you decide what to work on with him? Or whether it would be better to pair him up with someone who is a better match for him.

My mare can be very grouchy at times which has made it more difficult to bond with her than horses I have owned before.....but the more experiences we have together the closer we have become. It took her a good couple of years before she would put any trust in me...
 
Took me well over a year to get any bond with my gelding who had never had a human bond before. He had no interest in me whatsoever for a long time and now he is such a one to one horse, he adores his mum. Whereas I had a 5 month old filly who was taken off her dam too early who bonded with me very quickly. She would neigh as soon as she heard my voice! Sometimes it just takes that extra bit of time.
 
Had my mare 5 years and just nothing. She's on loan at moment and girl adores her. Will sell to her for fraction of value if she wants her as I feel bad i've had her from a foal and less connected than this girl who's had her 5 months!
 
I do not think that it takes long to bond with the average horse at all.
You just need to be a firm, fair consistent leader. Correcting any unwanted behaviour as soon as it starts.
 
I have bonded with all of mine except one- i think she was too well behaved!! I like quirky horses and she didnt have much personality- my mum was distraught when she left, it didnt really bother me
 
Agreed that sometimes personalities just clash. I had a share horse a number of years ago that I just didn't feel anything for, and I'm sure he felt the same about me. After 6mths I gave him up, never really missed him but I know for a fact that his owner was smitten with him - each to their own. Either you click or you don't, IMO.
 
I've had this issue a few times - for me I think it was because I felt pressured to do certain things with the horse so wasn't enjoying it as much as I could have. I think consistency and routine is the key though for your horse to bond with you - try things like feeding him his tea holding the bucket (but not overly petting him while youre doing this) and lots of lunging and trying new things together. i'm sure you'll bond soon :)
 
I had a TB mare on loan once and we came pretty close to beating the crap out of each other. Everything was a fight, even trying to put a rug on her required an argument.

My old boy (dec) and current boy took me well over a year to bond with each one. Love them both to bits for the 'special' kind of special they are but it took us a while.
 
I put Blue out on loan for about 4 years and after i got him back it has taken me almost two years to feel like i have finally really bonded with him again. That was hard because before we shared such a great relationship, but i stuck at it and now it feels even more special as i appreciate him so so much! :)
 
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