Cat problem :’(

[poiuytrewq]

Briefly, when we moved to this house on a farm 3 years back there was a stray cat. We captured her and a kitten and had her spayed before returning her to the farm. (We started feeding her as soon as we realised she lived there, was starving and permenantly pregnant)
On being freed she kept returning crying for her baby who we had kept as he wasn’t old enough to be done. The vets asked us to return him in a few weeks so instead of re-trapping we decided to keep him.
We felt sorry for her so trapped and got her back in the house. They lived in for 18 months. She became nervously friendly. He was feral.
We left doors and windows open but they stayed in the house.
Until one day she left. Followed a week later by the son.
Having cared for them for so long I missed them and got a kitten (my beautiful little thug Arlo)
Anyway she’s returned. (A few months ago) I feed her at the back door twice a day. She then spends all evening sat at the glass door staring in at us.
We have left it open when the weather was better and she would back off and sit a few foot away, now she comes in but freaks out if we shut the door. Obviously I can’t leave doors wide open now. It’s too cold and until Arlo is done we are keeping him in. They have met several times and tolerate each other. They play through the glass.
I feel awful. It’s heartbreaking seeing her sat in the rain staring in but she is scared of being in especially when the dogs are around.b(she wasn’t bothered by them when she lived inside, they won’t hurt her)
What the hell do I do?!!

 

[SOS]

Get a cat flap and confine Arlo to one the other side of the house? Not ideal but short term? When they do meet be sure to introduce them through doors and doing ‘scent’ swapping first. A rushed, bad first meeting between cats can be hard to rectify.

Or buy her a nice little outdoor shelter (preferably off the ground as they feel safer that way). Feed her in there if you do feed her but be aware of attracting other cats and/or rats.


https://www.thepetexpress.co.uk/out...-gFVjSddwPn-RoCOU0QAvD_BwE#katden:Kennel+Only

How old is the kitten? Most places will castrate normally formed, healthy sized males from 4 months.

 

[FinnishLapphund]

For the cat flaps leading out in the cat enclosures I had made previously, I simply made holes in wooden doors, and put in cat flaps. But for my cat enclosure in the house I live in now, I removed a glass window from its frame, and bought that type of plastic which you can use in greenhouses instead of glass walls/roofs. I cut a hole in the plastic, put in the cat flap, and put the plastic glass replacement in the window frame.
I didn't feel that I had the skills (or tools) to try to put the cat flap in the real glass window, and the wall is thick, made of some type of concrete, and not something I have the tools to drill a hole big enough for a cat flap in. So I came up with this alternative, and it have worked great.

I just wanted to mention it as an example of an alternative for where to put up a cat flap. Also, if I would sell the house one day, it would be very easy to restore the window to a normal window, without cat flap, again.

 

[asmp]

I'd do as Saddleoversofa and make somewhere for her to sleep outdoors. My mum has adopted a stray but my dad isn't happy about him living in the house at night as they do not have a cat flap. They have a cheap plastic dog's kennel lined with blankets and I bought my mum one of those plastic pads that heat up in the microwave for when it gets very cold. Cat looks very snug in there thoughout the winter.

 

[Sussexbythesea]

An alternative might be if you have a spare room where you can keep her separate you could catch her and shut her in with food and litter trays and hidey places until she’s settled gradually getting her back into a more tame and less nervous and reactive state.

Not quite the same situation but my very loving ginger cat went a bit feral this summer and would disappear for 24-36 hours at a time which was compounded when I got a rescue dog. Over the summer and warmer autumn I let him get in with it. Now it’s colder I’ve shut him in quite a bit so that either he continues to hide or starts to interact because he’s bored. It’s stsrting to work. My other cat is fine and integrates quite happily.

 

[ycbm]

Get Arlo done. My kitten is younger than yours and he was done three weeks ago.

 

[BeckyFlowers]

Second what the others have said about an outdoor shelter with plenty of blankets - preferably put somewhere where the dogs can't get to it so that she feels safe and secure. It does sound like a sad and tricky situation, but it's nice that she feels confident enough to come to your home. It will be easier when Arlo is neutered, obvs, and at least she is used to putting up with kittens! Personally I wouldn't shut her in the house as this will probably panic her and make her feel like she can't get away. Bearing in mind she's a feral anyway, she is used to living outside and it's not Beast From The East weather so she will probably be happier out than shut in. What a lucky girl to have you looking after her

 

[AmyMay]

Another who says outdoor shelter. But a good wooden structure rather than plastic.

 

[Clodagh]

My farm cat has a cardboard box lined with polysterene and an old towel in it. It is high up and open fronted so she can see out and feel safe. It is under a lean to so no wind or wet can get straight in. When it gets cold I will up the bedding to vet bed. She uses it a lot.

 

[poiuytrewq]

She already has a “house” we bought a sturdy wooden chicken coop and put her old bed in. She will go in it to eat but that’s all.
They have met, several times they are pretty much ok together.
I do need to get him castrated I know, that’s not the issue really though as she is spayed, it’s simply the vet said he’s more likely to wander if he’s not done. I need to wait til I get a week off work to take him. That’s all I’m holding out for really. I can’t drop him at the vet and be at work in time!
She’s really friendly, but she wants me to sit outside with her, or she will come in the door and sit inside but only as ling as the door remains open.
I can’t put a cat flap anywhere unfortunately. It’s an old converted barn and only has glass doors. It’s also not owned by us.
The only possible option one day might be into the utility room for Arlo but the dogs live down there so she won’t go anywhere near that.
It’s just so sad, she literally has her face on the glass staring and meowing

 

[Sussexbythesea]

Just watched a bit of Jackson Galaxy and he offered similar advice to mine for getting a feral cat living inside. I guess it also depends whether you really want to have her back living with you properly now that you have Arlo.

 

[Mule]

A couple I pet sit for have 3 outdoor cats that strayed in to them. They have a few kennels with blankets in them around the garden so they have somewhere to sleep. This winter they rigged up a heater for the kennel on the porch using the porch lights. Don't ask me how they did it, but the cats look lovely and cozy in there. If you are good with electrics mabey you could set up something similar.

Two of the cats are mother and son and they often share the heated kennel. I haven't seen the other cat in it so I'm suspicious they don't let him in. The last time I was there he came in to the house. I spent ages trying to convince him he couldn't suddenly decided to become an indoor cat while his owners were away 😁

 

[poiuytrewq]

Just watched a bit of Jackson Galaxy and he offered similar advice to mine for getting a feral cat living inside. I guess it also depends whether you really want to have her back living with you properly now that you have Arlo.

Yes! We think the world of her Arlo only came about because we liked and missed her so much when she vanished. I think Arlo would enjoy it too, He gets quite excited when she's around.
I was perfectly happy for her to live outside when she just popped over for food and a fuss then went off on her way again, its the hanging round and looking longingly in at us! Maybe I'm being a sap!

I have to say she was a hairy thing and our upstairs carpet is so much easier to keep clean without her!

 

[FinnishLapphund]

I don't think you're a sap. Some people glorify how happy animals are to live free, but to me the life of a feral, or half feral, cat seems quite difficult. So I think that if you can teach her to accept that she can be indoors with the doors shut, by shutting her in for awhile, I can only see that leading to positive benefits for her in the long run.

 

[Sussexbythesea]

I believe cats are my spirit animal and there is nothing I don’t love about them so you’re certainly not a sap in my eyes 😻 I just wondered if you might be worried about the dynamics changing? My two boys used to love each other but now they pretty much detest each other which is really sad.