Confidence needed ASAP

[kell1612]

HI All

I need a swift kick up the a!se to get some confidence. I have been googling and wanted peoples advice on hypnotherapy. The issues i am having is confidence in jumping, i freak out when i am heading for the jump (we are only talking max 50cm) and tense up but when I do finally go over it LOVE it . I am not looking to compete or anything but just dont want to be stuck in a field when I am out hunting as I am too scared to jump. I have been doing group xc lessons (I only manage one or two jumps) but am thinking maybe one on one lessons would be good, also I wont be so embarrassed when I do have a breakdown...haha

I am London based so am only able to ride about three times a month.. Cost and travel..

Any advice welcome please x

 

[Griffin]

I know a few people who hypnotherapy has worked really well for, so it's definitely worth exploring.

My other thought would be 'do you need to jump?' I never really enjoyed jumping, although I liked the adrenaline rush afterwards. Now, I don't jump because there are other aspects of riding enjoy more.

 

[be positive]

Only riding 3 times a month is not going to help your gain confidence in yourself, your horse or your instructor, being in a group will also mean limited one to one so in an hour shared with 3 others you are getting 15 mins, if that, of direct instruction, there are so many aspects to riding, jumping, hunting that while hypnotherapy may help it will not replace what you really require which is hours spent in the saddle gaining feel, trust and skill to enable you to build up your ability to the stage where you start to ride more instinctively.

I have helped many riders build their confidence and it was the ability to ride regularly, to gradually develop the knowledge and experience to cope with things slightly outside of their comfort zone that gave them the confidence to move on, I appreciate without your own horse this is not easy but I would look at options, sharing is the obvious way to get the hours in the saddle without it costing a fortune even in London it should be possible to find something and you could still have lessons at the RS if it is not possible on the share horse.

 

[CMcC]

HI All

I need a swift kick up the a!se to get some confidence. I have been googling and wanted peoples advice on hypnotherapy. The issues i am having is confidence in jumping, i freak out when i am heading for the jump (we are only talking max 50cm) and tense up but when I do finally go over it LOVE it . I am not looking to compete or anything but just dont want to be stuck in a field when I am out hunting as I am too scared to jump. I have been doing group xc lessons (I only manage one or two jumps) but am thinking maybe one on one lessons would be good, also I wont be so embarrassed when I do have a breakdown...haha

I am London based so am only able to ride about three times a month.. Cost and travel..

Any advice welcome please x

I could have written your post about a year ago. Personally I don’t know about hypnotherapy for me the only way to build confidence is to do it, get out and jump - start very small and build up.
I am lucky to have my own pony and he is a superstar, he will only stop at a jump if he senses I don't want to do it so I have to man-up and pretend I do. if I don’t he will just slow down and step over the jump in walk, to the great amusement of everyone watching.
I belong to two riding clubs and have very supportive friends in both. I go to clinics and always find the instructors very sympathetic and encouraging to those of us who only want to jump low and lack confidence. I have been to clinics with an Olympic eventer and I thought she would think I was pathetic, she is absolutely great and I always leave her clinics thinking I could have done a little bit more. Have also been to XC clinics and build up to doing a sequence of small jumps. I can confidently jump about 70cm now.
My other tip is get someone to photograph or better video you, you will be surprised how easy the jumping looks when you can see yourself And how much fun it looks. When I see pictures I just want to do more!
i can’t wait until we can get back to clinics again and am hoping to go to local XC course with a friend in the next couple of weeks.
A year ago I wouldn’t have believed I would be writing this, so it is possible.
Good luck

 

[mini_b]

@be positive is right, you will struggle to work on your confidence if you aren’t getting much chance to work on your competence.
Don’t be so hard on yourself, you’re bound to be nervous if you aren’t doing it much.
save yourself some cash and spend the hypnotherapy money on more lessons/riding experience.

there is a lot to be said for the help of a positive teacher that pushes you out of your comfort zone and makes you think “hey, I can do this”
the more times you jump the less dreadful you will feel - promise x