confidence wobble coming on - how can I stop it before it starts?

[little_rou]

Hi All

some of you may know I had a battle with confidence issues a few years ago after coming off my old mareon a very busy road near to where we live and ending up under a lorry!!!

Since then I have managed to get back on track and havent had any major confidence wobbles for at least a year or two.

Feeling brave I have started to ride near and around this road in recent months, but no longer on it as its far too busy nowadays.

At the weekend I crashed my new horse in a rather spectacular style - he spooked at a pheasant, I came off him at top speed, straight out the side door, hit a tree on the way down and then he came down on top of me, before jumping up and galloping flat out towards that same road!!!! he couldnt be caught, police had to be called to close the road, I was on my own, and it scared the life out of me!! luckly we are both going to be ok, were both cut and brusied but all in all, a lucky escape was had by all, my problem is we are both now signed off for at least a week, I am already starting to get anxious about riding him again, Ive only had him 7 weeks and we were bonding soo well, I am totally in love with him and he is the horse I want, I just have that niggling feeling already.

Last time I lost my confidence it started just like this, anxiety, niggling doubts, what ifs, which got worse and worse and eventually I stopped riding completely. I dont want it to happen again, any tips/ideas/advice??

sorry - went on longer than I thought!! red sky sea salt and suffolk cider vinegar crisps and sainsburys 'posh squash' for getting this far

 

[Cop-Pop]

Well done for getting back on in the first place I was hit by a car while riding so I totally get that roads can be a very scarey place!

Are you able to walk him out in hand at all? When I start to lose confidence riding my mare I do extra ground work with her before I get on, Ive found it helps but she's a stroppy cow at the best of times lol. Also, are you able to ride a quieter horse a couple of times before you ride yours again?

My mare still isn't suitable for hacking but to get mysef back into it I borrowed a horse and took someone with me - I found that if I was chatting it distracted me from nerves

 

[scatty_mare]

Cripes sounds like a lucky escape, very glad you are both ok.

Firstly, an incident like that is BOUND to knock your confidence. Accept this and don't beat yourself up about it, that's important. All these niggles and what if feelings are normal - anyone sane would have them.

Secondly, don't put yourself under any pressure. If you never in your life again feel happy to ride near that horrible road, why should you! Just do things you enjoy and feel happy about to begin with, and build it up slowly. Take as much time as you need.

Don't feel embarrassed about asking for help and support. That can make all the difference

Good luck! x

 

[VoR]

Cripes sounds like a lucky escape, very glad you are both ok.

Firstly, an incident like that is BOUND to knock your confidence. Accept this and don't beat yourself up about it, that's important. All these niggles and what if feelings are normal - anyone sane would have them.

Secondly, don't put yourself under any pressure. If you never in your life again feel happy to ride near that horrible road, why should you! Just do things you enjoy and feel happy about to begin with, and build it up slowly. Take as much time as you need.

Don't feel embarrassed about asking for help and support. That can make all the difference

Good luck! x

I agree with all the above, at least you are both basically OK! I was given a little trick by a sports psychologist when I had a 'crisis of confidence' last year.

Need to do this 2 or three times a day for a couple weeks. Picture two TV Screens in your mind, one is showing you and your horse out having a great time doing exactly what you want to in perfect control, the other is showing you having problems like the one you just had. Here comes the trick, imagine the good screen becoming more and more vivid in colour and growing in size, the other getting dimmer and dimmer, less and less clolour and smaller and smaller until the good picture fills your 'vision'.
Sounds very 'tree-huggish' but it works, eventually all you can see is things going well and your mind picks up positive feelings. You'll still have nerves they are just more manageable.
Give it a go!