deja224 - drawing a line under it all

T

the watcher

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The final outcome is, as most of us knew, that the two affected ponies were PTS the other day. There is a full vet report now outlining the cause of the illness and it would appear that the dealer they were purchased from effectively as rescues had been less than careful about access to ragwort in hay. The ILPH have also been involved.

If there is a lesson to be learned by people who feel sorry for poor ponies and rescue them, it is that the damage is often already done, whether it be worm infestation or ragwort. The posts, which were an appeal for help and advice, might not have been well written and naive, and she may lack some basic knowledge - but is well meaning and was desperately hurt by the huge number of abusive PMs sent, at a time when she was having to have 2 ponies PTS.

Deja224 has no horse or ponies now, nor any plans to acquire any in the near future.

It would be nice to think that if she is planning to buy or loan a horse at some time in the future, Deja224 could still come to this forum for good advice and support.
 
well said mother hen......

just reflects what i posted and thought/knew of this unfortunate episode....



morals to be learned, i feel...
 
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well said mother hen......



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I agree, I felt awful reading that thread poor poor ponies it was a tragic situation made worse by her inexperience. I hope that something happens about the dealer, sounded incredibly unscrupulous.
 
Tragic for the ponies and upsetting for deja224 but also a good reminder as to why it's necessary to have experienced help available to you. But you're right, we need to draw a line under it all now - the forum should be a friendly helpful place.
 
i do think its good to agree to disagree- Reading bak on the posts (to which I chose not to repy) there were some very upsetting and hurtful things said.
I wish Deja224 all the best for the future and Im sorry it ended this way
 
I think that her heart was in the right place, and she was trying to help these ponies, must be so upsetting for her
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All she wanted was some advice, not grief.
I do hope that Deja224 gets another horse and in my eyes she should be welcome back to this forum and I hope she returns.
Izzi xx
 
I didn't respond to the thread either and felt some posts were very offensive.
I wish deja all the best and hope we will see her back sometime, and that we can all be friendly and helpful
 
To be honest, I was sickened by some of the responses to the appeals for advice.

I stopped myself from commentating at the time (more fool me!) but I could see that it was evident from deja's posts and photos how much she loves her animals.

Shame on all the people who posted derogatory remarks and I hope that Deja does not feel she has to give up just because of the bigotry and cynicism which is sadly all too evident on this forum.
 
I don't understand the need for offensive PMs... If you've got something to say, then bl**dy well say it in the open
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Especially if you're sure you're right. I HATE people who hide behind the anonimity of HHO to apportion blame when they wouldn't have the cojones to do in RL.
 
Deja244 - When I saw the messages I could understand how you must have felt & I am sorry that I did not post anything at the time. At the the beginning of this year I had a horse on loan that fell ill with what seemed at first to be a failrly run of the mill respiratory infection. Except that the weight just fell off him & he went from healthy looking horse to looking a welfare case in just 5 days. A lady on the yard who should have known better was quite horrible to me & refused to beleive that he could have lost all that weight so quickly. She didn't often see him unrugged so had not seen the change. I was very hurt as she is very experienced and someone I had often turned to for advice & should have known me better.
Luckily for me he had had new shoes a couple of days before he fell ill & the same farrier came out to do her horses while the vet was there for mine. He was shocked at how much he had lost in a week and the vet replied how he could see the weight loss on him over 24 hours. Lady was deeply apologetic & hasn't been able to do enough for me since. I hope that the next time anybody inexperienced needs advice some people will remember how quick they were to jump to conclusions with you and will react in the same way as that lady has with me. There is a great deal of good advice to be had from this board from people with very varied expoeriences and as a relatively novice owner I have benefited a lot but it does seem that message boards (all of them I think) can get a bit "off" at times. Don't let it put you off. Take a deep breath, mourn your ponies. Take your time and if you do get another pony learn not to let your head rule your heart. And don't beleive for one moment that there is a single person on this or any other board that has not made a mistake.
Big hug to you. Remember what is far more important than the mistakes you make is how you learn from them. Good luck.
 
Bloody hell. How awful.

I would like to apologise to Deja224 - for whilst my posts were not abusive, they were clearly not as helpful or supportive as they could have been - and a sweeping assumption was made.

Sorry Deja224, I hope you read this - and accept my apology. Hugs to you for a terribly sad, sad time.
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Echo AmyMay. Although I was not abusive, I too could have been more supportive and I did think that one or two posts got a little personal - so apologies to Deja224.

For those who sent abusive PMs, shame on you
crazy.gif


RIP little ponies
 
I read the posts at the time and whilst deja came over as very inexperienced, apolgies if this was not the case, I was horrified at the content and tone of some of the replies she received in what could only be a very upsetting time for her.

God knows what the pm's she received were like.

I hope that she is doing ok and to have 2 ponies pts must be devastating, I know people express their opinions and have a right to reply but lets think how this could be received by the end users, we are not all thick skinned, and there are people out there that are sensitive and take to heart some of the "nastier" comments.

After all we are all on this forum for one reason - we all love horses .
 
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