desperate for advice...anyone, please!

[mirandaharry]

Hiya, could be long, so settle in with cuppa!

As briefly as poss, been feeling increasingly crap for yonks, eventually went to docs and appears have heart prob, nothing majorly serious, hopefully

, but now sent off on rounds of tests to establish what's what! Anyway big prob is NO riding, NO mucking out etc...so having a major panic about horsey, can't do anything with him and can't afford to go onto full livery

.

First reaction was to sell asap. Funnily enough someone phoned yard looking for horse and they passed my number on. Lovely sounding lady, seems very interested BUT I know nothing about her and once horse has gone that's it

Other option is friend at yard has lost use of own horse and would be willing to take on mine, ride, muck out, look after him, BUT I would still have to pay towards keep. He may or may not buy him at a later date, but it means ny boy stays in my "power", I can still ride when I get better etc, etc!

OH thinks I'm mad to turn down a sale and thinks I should go for that. I'm obv much keener on second option, but if I go for that do I draw up some sort of contract, if so saying what, and how much should I expect someone to pay towards my horse, when they are doing me a favour, altho' they are also getting all the riding, chance to hunt etc.

Arrgghhh!!! My head is really spinning

, I just don't know what to do for the best (thinking hiding under my duvet would be a good start

!!!). Anyone with any words of wisdom would be much appreciated, big thanks in advance x

 

[rema]

Mmmm if i could afford to pay towards his keep i think i would rather let said friend take over the reins.I guess it depends on alot on how much you need the money.

Hope you get sorted out very soon.

 

[Patches]

No real words of wisdom from me (sadly lacking in the wisdom department). My initial thoughts are that you shouldn't be too hasty to sell as you never know it might be something easily rectified once you've had all the tests and you could be back in the saddle before Christmas. If the news isn't quite so good (but I have everything crossed for you that it is) and it's looking like a more long term lay off, then perhaps selling would be the better option as owning your horse but not being able to participate in the day to day care and riding may frustrate you and impede your recovery (sounds like you need to take it easy and remain stress free).

Is there any chance your friend would take over temporarily until you have a firm diagnosis, course of action? You can then review the situation when you know what you are dealing with.

Best of luck and I do hope you'll be feeling top of the shop again very soon.

 

[johnsongreyhorse]

If it was me I would go for letting friend take over for a while and sharing costs, sending big hugs, hope it works out for you

 

[ruscara]

I think you are probably not in the best frame of mind to be making permanent decisions, as you are no doubt worried and scared; and you also have no idea at the moment what is wrong or how it will affect you in the future. Therefore my advice, for what it's worth, is not to sell your horse, but take advantage of your friend's offer for the time being.
I do hope that you get sorted out quickly and that it's nothing serious. x

 

[vicm2509]

I would go for the second option, at least until you have a clear diagnosis of what is wrong and how long you wont be able to ride for. Or you could try putting him out on full loan for a while until you are fully recovered.

If however the problem is more serious (which I really hope it isnt) then it may be best to sell him.

I would not sell him right now though, your head must be all over the place at the moment as rushing into hasty decisions may make you more stressed which cant be good for you. Let your friend take him over for a while until you are sure what you want to do.

I have my fingers crossed that you will be on the road to recovery soon

 

[filly190]

Please dont panic, you need to know the full situation.

For example my mum was going in for a hip operation and was told her heart was that cronic they would not operate. After further investigations the op went ahead. The hospital frightened her too death, my parents went on holiday thinking she could drop dead at any time, she was told not to even lift a kettle.

While you are waiting to know the outcome, take things easy and do as the hospital asks, lets hope you are in for good news.

All these tests take time, and its a horrible waiting game, but it came right for my mum, so please feel reassured and dont rush into anything

 

[ladylisa]

I would go for the second option, i would say that said friend is to pay for shoes as there would be no need for them if you were not riding. and try to work out a split with the other bills!

 

[fjudge]

The only trouble is...if you let the friend take your precious horse on until your better it will be hunting etc.

God forbid it does, but what if something was to happen, ie: a bad fall out hunting...to the horse as well as rider. You would feel terrible and scared that your horse is damaged and that you cant blame it on yourself.

Im sure this is unlikely, but just thought ide throw in that thought. Hope you decide on what to do and all goes well

x

 

[no_no_nanette]

What rotten news for you, do hope you get more positive diagnosis after the tests. My bro now up and hunting again after a heart scare; the treatments, even if they do find something a bit wrong, are just amazingly good now.
I really agree with everyone - not a time to be taking a decision that you might really regret later on, and once the horse is gone its gone. Seems like a good short-term option to accept offer from friend. I would think about drawing up a contact/agreement - I know this sounds a bit formal, but even with a friend it means that everything is agreed and written down, so stops you worrying. And things like who pays for insurance, etc, get sorted out. The BHS have an example on their website - its a bit heavy, but we adapted it when we loaned our horse out, and found it really useful.
Lots of luck, and hope you have good news asap!

 

[Allykat]

I'd go for the second option. If you sell there is everychance your scare may not be as bad as initially thought, then you have no horse. Option 2 will allow you to still be part of your horses life with all the work taken out. Just make sure you do get a proper contract drawn up stating who is responsible for what etc.

I hope your tests go ok and that it is really nothing serious.