Did I do the right thing?

SatansLittleHelper

Well-Known Member
Joined
27 December 2011
Messages
5,749
Location
Shropshire
Visit site
Took friends pony for a short ride this morning to friends house as we had decided to bath her etc and we don't have a hose at the field.
Pony can't be a little nappy at times but doesn't "do" anything, just plants herself and says no thanks lol.
Anyhow I've found that a tap from the whip to back up my leg does the trick and off we go. She is a bit "looky" as very green but not fazed by much...she copes with alsorts of very large vehicles such as tractors, coaches, rattly trailers and so on but on the whole a very pleasant young lady who just needs to see the world. If she stops to look at something I usually allow her the time to realise it's fine etc and then push on.
Today I had to take her over a bridge crossing a dual carriageway. It's a road sized bridge with two lanes of traffic. She planted and wouldn't move on. I circled her and tried again but she tried to back up a few steps. After a few minutes of this I got off and led her over...she went on ok but was tense walking over. Once the other side I got back on and continued to where we were headed without much bother. A different friend has berated me saying I should have made her go on and that dismounting has taught her she can get away with being silly.
I'm now questioning my actions? My feelings on this mare are that she hasn't seen much and lacks confidence, I never feel a battle is the answer in that case as they lose trust in you? Was I wrong??
 

scats

Well-Known Member
Joined
11 September 2007
Messages
10,430
Location
Wherever it is I’ll be limping
Visit site
I hate this ‘the horse has won if you dismount’ attitude when it comes to potentially scary/spooky situations. I don’t see riding my horses as being in competition with them, we are a partnership and if I feel like I can give more confidence to the animal on the ground, then I will hop off and do so.

Sure, if you’d dismounted, given up and turned back home again, then you could argue you’ve taught the horse a poor lesson, but you got where you needed to be safely and the horse has learnt that you are someone it can trust. Each little experience like this is a building block for the future.
 

MumofWhiz

Well-Known Member
Joined
22 April 2017
Messages
192
Visit site
That's what I'd have done too; no point in a big confrontation and it may well be that next time she will go over no problem whatsoever. As Scats says, it's a partnership thing.
 

Polos Mum

Well-Known Member
Joined
22 September 2012
Messages
5,931
Location
West Yorkshire
Visit site
I don't think she got away with it. She didn't want to go over the bridge and she went over the bridge - if she is green and lacking confidence it won't be whether you were riding her or not.
Worse options would have been to turn around and go home or have a massive fight on a public road and one or both of you get hurt.


I had one that was nappy and I did get off, but then I'd march him on foot for much longer hack than normal - sometimes getting back on (and off again if nonsense started again) I do think he learned that the nonsense didn't actually achieve anything - he still had to go out on his own. So IMHO mission accomplished without stress or risk to me.


I used to be of the never get off opinion but having tried the fight it out approach for many years I think a less fuss option works for most horses - especially green ones.
 

LaurenBay

Well-Known Member
Joined
15 November 2010
Messages
5,883
Location
Essex
Visit site
I hate this ‘the horse has won if you dismount’ attitude when it comes to potentially scary/spooky situations. I don’t see riding my horses as being in competition with them, we are a partnership and if I feel like I can give more confidence to the animal on the ground, then I will hop off and do so.

Sure, if you’d dismounted, given up and turned back home again, then you could argue you’ve taught the horse a poor lesson, but you got where you needed to be safely and the horse has learnt that you are someone it can trust. Each little experience like this is a building block for the future.

This ^^^^

I used to dismount regularly when my mare first started hacking out.
 

Pinkvboots

Well-Known Member
Joined
25 August 2010
Messages
21,358
Location
Hertfordshire
Visit site
When I first hacked my just backed horse we hacked alone a lot and I was forever getting off if he was worried about something, he always walked past in hand and I found after a few times leading him past scary things he would walk past without me getting off, I don't see the point having a big battle and upsetting them if you can get off and get them going again without a fuss.
 

Pinkvboots

Well-Known Member
Joined
25 August 2010
Messages
21,358
Location
Hertfordshire
Visit site
I also think walking over a motorway bridge is pretty scary for any horse let a lone a green youngster on her own I thi k you did well to get her over in hand
 

Ambers Echo

Well-Known Member
Joined
13 October 2017
Messages
9,965
Visit site
The horse has no clue you were in a competition! Imagine a slightly different scenario - horse plants as ground feels a little boggy and he isn-t sure - you see that the ground is worse than you had realised especially a little further on so you turn round to go another way.
Who in that situation would then start worrying they had taught the horse to be silly or evasive?

In situations with a genuinely nervous horse it is all about building their confidence and hopping off to lead them past sticky bit is just part of that. The only think to watch out for is that genuine behaviour does not turn into learned behaviour. Nappiness should reduce over time as confidence improves. If it actually gets worse not better than start considering the possibility that the horse has learnt to evade through nappy behaviour but from what you have said that is not the situation you are in.
 

Crazy_cat_lady

Well-Known Member
Joined
14 January 2012
Messages
6,887
Visit site
It's one of the things I did to get mine hacking alone when I first got him. If he would plant and stick/ leg/ trying to move him sideways then straight didn't work then I'd hop off, lead for 100 m or so to get him rolling then get back on and we would carry on. I now don't have to get off at all. Letting her win would have been turning round and going home.
 

Mule

Well-Known Member
Joined
27 October 2016
Messages
7,655
Visit site
You brought her where you wanted to go so on or off I don't see that it matters. Imo it was a better way of resolving the situation than getting aggressive.
 

SatansLittleHelper

Well-Known Member
Joined
27 December 2011
Messages
5,749
Location
Shropshire
Visit site
Thanks everyone, I appreciate the input. I never see the sense in getting into an "argument " with a horse, esp a young one. Before I tackle this bridge again on board my friend and I will do a few in hand walks over it til she feels less nervous. We are in a rural area where the road through the village has been bypassed, hence this bridge over said bypass. It must seem so strange to have those big noisy whizz things simply disappear underneath lol.
I rode her in an ear net today because I didn't want her to be savaged by flies and I'm wondering if this muffled the sound a little and made it confusing for her??
 

MiJodsR2BlinkinTite

Well-Known Member
Joined
16 February 2009
Messages
11,023
Location
Slopping along on a loose rein somewhere in Devon
Visit site
OP we regularly have to ride across road-bridges over a busy trunk-road; and when I got my youngster last summer the aim was to get her (and me!) across in one piece. Here, we have three different bridges, and all of our routes are circular, so we'll go over one roadbridge say on the way out, and go back over the same road, over another one, on the way home! - we have to cross back over a roadbridge to get back home again!! So you need to be sure you can get back across again or else its a duvet, thermos & grass-verge jobbie!

Let me re-wind a little: this road has been in existence since 1997, that's when it (and the roadbridges) were built, and the first time I took my old boy who I had then across the bridge, he didn't like it one bit! This is a horse who was in every other respect totally bombproof, and a real darling, but he just didn't trust it that first time, and hesitated, so I got off and walked him over, just to reassure him, just like the OP. Ever after, TBH I always suspected that with him, he never truly believed roadbridges were safe, but he went across anyway because he wanted to please me and because I "said" yes its safe matey.

With my youngster, I just thought one day OK so let's go for it, didn't have another horse to nanny her or anything like that, and I was prepared to hop off and lead her across if necessary. One of the problems with our bridges is that you get traffic (inc buses etc) whizzing up from behind you when you are actually ON the roadbridge! Which bearing in mind the railings by the side are low enough for a horse to jump over, is rather disconcerting! So we approached the bridge for the first time, and I was prepared for her to hesitate, but no! she went across it without any problems the first time I asked her to! No hesitation at all! And this was solo. But she is an exceptional little girl and whilst I was prepared to get off and walk her, she was just so very chilled and laid back about it all that I knew I didn't need to.

OP I consider you did EXACTLY the right thing: you read the signs of what your horse was "telling" you, and you gave reassurance and calmness to the situation by getting off and walking across. Again, going back to my youngster, we encountered a building site: a very noisy rowdy one with every machine you could think off all going at the same time! She "planted", didn't try to run away, just planted, and shook like a leaf, bless her little heart. She wasn't being naughty, she was scared, I knew that. So I got off and led her past. The foreman and some of the blokes then took this as their cue that hey-ho here's a posh cow with a horse who won't go past, and came out and watched. We didn't care, we walked past. Then I walked her back again, reassuring her and stroking her down to reward her and tell her what a good girl she'd been. Then we walked past again, and in fact I led her past everything about half a dozen times, then when we'd done it for the last time, I just hopped up unobtrusively and just rode her past, easy as peasy, and she was fine! She's been past since without any problems. But I think that if I hadn't given her the time, and space, and reassured her by leading her past that first time, that it might have been something we'd have had a problem with.

Have a look at the Michael Peace website; and if you ever get to watch this man in action, well worth a travel. Ditto Vanessa Bee who does the Horse Agility - both these are people who do a LOT on the ground with horses and therefore know the value of it.

I think you did well to get this youngster across; they'll have learnt to trust you as Herd Leader because of this, and you'll have formed a bond which will stand you in good stead for the future. I've had professional help with my little 'un, and my professional teaches the value of working on the ground like this too.

I very much suspect that the next time you approach this roadbridge, your youngster will very likely be fine. But if not, if you sense any hesitation, then I'd be inclined to just do what you did, slip off, and walk over. Do it a few times, say half a dozen times, just to reiterate the learning, and when you get to the other side, reward by scratching the mane, a nice back/bum-scratch or whatever. Just watch your own breathing too, keep it deep and rhythmic; you could sing, whistle, tell yourself a joke, whatever. Just to keep your body and posture relaxed, that is important. Then when you're both ready, you can hop up and do the same thing ridden - and beware of that moment when you HAVE got across, and you take a deep breath and say "phew" we did it, coz your horse will pick straight up on that and will think OMG was there really something to worry about after all?? Its sooohh easy to do that, I know I've done it when I managed to get my current horse over the bridge for the first time!! He was fine the first time, but not for the second, my professional said that I'd "told" him there was sommat to worry about! And he reacted accordingly.

I feel you have every justification in telling anyone who criticises your actions where to go: because believe me, when they're heading towards the next County on their spooky flighty horses, you'll be there sitting pretty on a lovely little horse passing every spook that's out there, with god-knows-what heading up the road towards you, and your little horse will be not only carrying you safely but also everyone will be asking you to "nanny" their fizzy horses past stuff, and over the bridges! Believe me, its beginning to happen; my little girlie is beginning to get herself a reputation for being a steady little horse that can be trusted in a crisis.

Well done. I think there's only success - and a lot of fun too - ahead of you!!

Enjoy your youngster :)
 
Last edited:

DabDab

Ah mud, splendid
Joined
6 May 2013
Messages
12,572
Visit site

This. Don't over think it, your actions won't have negatively affected her behaviour in future one jot. My horse is nine, and is a very experienced hacker and yet he still has to have the obligatory stop before going over a bridge (bridges are one of his 'things', along with wheelie bins), just a few seconds stop, but enough to continue to register his disapproval with me :rolleyes3:
 

SatansLittleHelper

Well-Known Member
Joined
27 December 2011
Messages
5,749
Location
Shropshire
Visit site
^^ Fab post MiJodsR2BlinkinTite..and thank you.
She actually belongs to my friend who has asked me to get her out and about as she herself is a little less confident and wants To lose some weight. She has taught this little mare some lovely manners as she had arrived with zero manners at all. She is now much more polite :)
She can be very strong in hand when walking her so we use a Dually as a rule.
Here we also have to come back over the bridge...I walked her home from my friend's house in hand without her saddle etc as she'd had a bath and we had ended our 1 mile ride to the house on a good note. She was still tense and looky over the bridge on our return journey but also knew she was going home which distracted her a bit :)
 

AmyMay

Situation normal
Joined
1 July 2004
Messages
65,903
Location
South
Visit site
I rarely dismount. But a nappy horse in the situation you describe could be lethal - you absolutely did the right thing.
 

SatansLittleHelper

Well-Known Member
Joined
27 December 2011
Messages
5,749
Location
Shropshire
Visit site
I should add that during the time she was out this morning she also encountered 2 coaches, a large tractor with scoop on front, a lorry with a rattly trailer, many cars, a motorbike, Sainsbury's delivery van, various wheelie bins, some small friendly dogs, some medium aggressive barky dogs and got bathed with a hosepipe from head to toe which has never happened to her before!!! I wont pretend she wasnt nervous etc but she coped well. All in all I felt very positive so was a bit disheartened to be told I'd done the wrong thing :(
 

MiJodsR2BlinkinTite

Well-Known Member
Joined
16 February 2009
Messages
11,023
Location
Slopping along on a loose rein somewhere in Devon
Visit site
^^ Fab post MiJodsR2BlinkinTite..and thank you.
She actually belongs to my friend who has asked me to get her out and about as she herself is a little less confident and wants To lose some weight. She has taught this little mare some lovely manners as she had arrived with zero manners at all. She is now much more polite :)
She can be very strong in hand when walking her so we use a Dually as a rule.
Here we also have to come back over the bridge...I walked her home from my friend's house in hand without her saddle etc as she'd had a bath and we had ended our 1 mile ride to the house on a good note. She was still tense and looky over the bridge on our return journey but also knew she was going home which distracted her a bit :)

Ahhh I see. Well what I will say then is that your friend is VERY lucky indeed to have someone riding your lovely youngster who is as sensitive as you; I am very fussy who I let ride my horses especially a youngster and you're obviously "thinking equine" (Michael Peace's phrase not mine!).

(Edited) have just read what you've said above. Case in point: you've obviously gained her trust and respect and wow just look at what you've achieved! The first time I took my little gal out over at my trainer's yard we met a combine harvester. We also ride through a working quarry regularly. Trust is the key; I don't consider myself a strong rider at all, or a bold one.

All the best to you both.
 
Last edited:
Joined
28 February 2011
Messages
16,451
Visit site
****** that! I'm with the pony! I hate going over motorway bridges!!!

But no Op you were not wrong. A lot of horses are more reassured by someone next to them as that is more common for them than someone on top of them. They can see you and take your lead.
 

JFTDWS

Well-Known Member
Joined
4 November 2010
Messages
20,982
Visit site
I have no problem staying on board a rude, nappy horse, and arguing the toss - within reason - but in the situation you describe, I think getting off is the right decision. Firstly, your horse wasn't being rude - it's young, green and in a new, overwhelming situation - there's no reason to have an argument with a horse who is saying "I don't understand", rather than "no". That's illogical and unfair, and it puts far more psychological pressure on a stressed young horse.

Secondly, there's the potential for things to go very wrong on a motorway bridge - if you had stayed on board and she took exception to being bullied her across, you would have risked causing a significant accident. And thirdly, having a lengthy discussion is likely to hold up traffic, which is a comparatively trivial annoyance to drivers, but not one likely to promote good relations in future!

Even if staying on board can be the right answer in some - or even many - situations, there's more than one way to skin a cat. Getting off is off is rarely the "wrong" answer - unless you turn around and go home!
 

irishdraft

Well-Known Member
Joined
13 November 2009
Messages
1,724
Visit site
You did the right thing my mare used to nap at various things when she was younger only way to get her past was to get off & lead she soon stopped napping when her confidence was up.
 

Doublethyme

Well-Known Member
Joined
7 July 2005
Messages
1,033
Visit site
Never understood the never get off attitude. Completely ridiculous. If the horse needs confidence, it doesn't rrally care where or how that confidence comes from.

I'm with the pony and EKW....id need my hand holding over a motorway bridge too !!
 

Pearlsasinger

Up in the clouds
Joined
20 February 2009
Messages
44,730
Location
W. Yorks
Visit site
Just to add my twopenn'orth, no you did the best thing in the circumstances. I'm not keen on riding over motorway bridges, although most local horses don't seem to care but there is one very high one in particular where there is a sign at either end which instructs riders to dismount and there are mounting blocks to enable remounting. This is because it is the safest thing to do. Just imagine if she had reared part way across and you had come off - what a mess that could have been - absolute carnage! As it is you are building her confidence in new situations, in the best way possible, she obviously trusts you to lead her safely.
 

Dave's Mam

Well-Known Member
Joined
23 July 2014
Messages
5,019
Location
Nottingham
Visit site
You got off, led over the bridge with a reassured pony, hopped back on & continued your way. Nothing wrong in my eyes.

I would also have got off, as I would be using Pony for support, as I am with Doublethyme & EKW, those bridges make me feel spewy even just to walk over.

Well done on getting over safely.
 

Cowpony

Well-Known Member
Joined
17 May 2013
Messages
2,953
Visit site
Three years ago my mare and I went to Hickstead for the first time. You have to go over a bridge made of railway sleepers to get to the arenas. She stopped and planted. My husband came along and led her over, but if he hadn't been there I would have got off and led her. The second time she was hesitant but walked over. Two years later we were there again. Got to the bridge, she hesitated a nanosecond, then walked over. I could feel her thinking "Oh yes, I remember this one. Nothing to worry about."
 
Top