Did I win or did I lose with her behaviour?

Holly Hocks

Holly Hocks

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I've got a 10 year old TB mare who I am bringing back into work after a number of lameness issues. She was a nappy so and so before the issues were investigated. Anyway, I've long-reined her for five weeks before getting on a couple of weeks ago. I've been riding her early mornings before there is any traffic on the roads and it was such a lovely night tonight I though I would take her out as we didn't go out this morning - same route, no change. Anyway, we were heading away from home and a car came up behind us. It was a single track lane, so I had to pull into a sort of passing area. Just as the car was going to pass, she decided that actually she would rather go home, whipped round and started plunging - you know the sort, not quite sure if she should buck, rear or bolt. Car driver shat herself and reversed rapidly (horsey person - I know her) whilst I attempted to bring beastie back under control. Now when this has happened in the past and I have used the whip, she has gone vertical which worries me. I can't win - I've tried everything. The more I turn her in the direction I want to go, the worse she gets. She is very athletic - the equine equivalent of Darcy Bussell. So tonight, in a millisecond of stillness, I leapt off her with the elasticity of a russian gymnast. Took reins over her head and just lead her up the road. Had a nice chat with the driver about her antics, got to a low wall and got on again, fully expecting a battle. I growled and sent her on her way and everything else on the ride was fine.
Now I've tried staying on when this has happened in the past and it usually results in me not winning and her scaring the crap out of me to the point where I never want to ride her again. Tonight, I got off, sorted her out, got back on and off we went again. I don't feel like I've lost my nerve tonight in the slightest - I'm actually happier because I managed to get her on her way again without a battle. But did I do the right thing?
 
Yes, you did the 'right thing' :) It may not have been the 'only' right choice, but you kept yourself, your horse and other road users safe, and you didn't let your mare dictate to you because you continued the ride.
 
Thank you - I feel I did the right thing, but I know it's the done thing not to get off - I feel it's the lesser of two evils - the other one being getting hurt. OH was quite amazed when I got home to tell him that she'd done it again, only this time I wasn't crying - just more determined to break the cycle of behaviour!
 
During my 'research' into napping there seems to be two schools of thought when it comes to getting off to lead forwards, one is that you shouldn't and you're giving in my doing so, the second is that you should as you're reinforcing your position as 'herd leader' by shepherding the horse past whatever they're napping at (eventually their confidence in you will grow and they'll go past without you needing to lead etc etc) I'd say neither are right or wrong, each horse is different and you did what was safe + most effective for you, and by the sounds of it mare appreciated it and settled afterwards!

Too many people cling on for grim death because they think getting off is admitting defeat, I don't think it is, I think its being sensible! Sounds like you did exactly what you needed to :) xx
 
I would say that the choice you made has resulted in still being alive and unharmed- definately a 'win' :D
maybe not everyones idea of the right thing to do by getting off, but if its the safest option then who cares! ;)
Elle x
 
Yes you did the right thing, I've had to jump off on a couple of occasions when the little monkey wouldn't go thorough a puddle or tried to start napping and then got back on at the next oppertunity
 
I agree that you did the right thing. my mare was a pain for napping, i refused to get into a big fight with her. I also got off, walked her on a bit, got on and rode til she started arsing around again. she got better each time until she could go out on her own without a fuss. I think you kept everyone safe and didn't let yours and her stress levels get out of control.
 
chestnuttymare said:
I agree that you did the right thing. my mare was a pain for napping, i refused to get into a big fight with her. I also got off, walked her on a bit, got on and rode til she started arsing around again. she got better each time until she could go out on her own without a fuss. I think you kept everyone safe and didn't let yours and her stress levels get out of control.
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Thanks - and I think that will be my plan for future incidents. If she were a pony I would battle it out every step of the way, but she's not - she's 16.2hh and a bit too athletic!! Good to hear that yours has got better. I am determined to get there with her, but also determined not to get hurt!
 
Yes totally agree with what you did!

My instructor has a lovely saying (stolen from someone else of course), whenever anyone talks about winning or losing a fight with a horse she always says....'who declared war!'

We have discussed the getting off thing, my loan horse used to go backwards at speed into ditches bla bla bla...IMO best to get off...dont make a big issue and over time she will stop.
 
Forget right and wrong, you did the safe and sensible thing. She still had to go out when you re-mounted, so you gave her the correct message. I'd rather get off than come off!
 
I think the safest thing is the right thing in situations like this, so yes you did the right thing and you still made her carry on so it’s all good.

I had to make a similar decision myself the other day. Went out for a supposedly quiet hack on my normally fairly unflappable stockhorse and as we went past the neighbours paddock on the grass verge, he took fright at one of the alpacas. The same alpacas they see every day.....but that day he decided it was an alien out to get him. Sigh. He shied, leapt sideways and we ended up having a mini bolt up the verge. He is also very athletic and it’s hard to stop him when he first gets going. I stayed on, got it under control and managed to pull him up about 150metre on. Although we are on a quiet dead end road, 500metres further on is the junction with the main road so I certainly don’t want him to get into the habit of bolting.

Anyway we came to a halt with him tail high, wide eyed and snorting. My first instinct was to ride him back past them a couple of times. I started riding him forwards but he was still clearly completely freaked out. He is blind in one eye and this doesn’t normally effect him too much but in heading back past them, they would have been on his blind side, and no doubt would have resulted in him whirling around to look at them, possibly trying to bolt again, and I didn’t fancy that.

So I got off, walked him past them a couple of times instead and did lots of groundwork as we went – backing up , yielding etc . He was majorly freaked out still but I stayed as calm as possible (calmer than I would have been had I stayed in the saddle) and at least we made a bit of progress with me on the ground.

When we got back to our gate I re-mounted and we then headed to the school for 30 mins more ‘work’ so hopefully he didn’t associate bolting with being let off work. Since then I have been leading him past every other day and gradually de-spooking him again. I plan on riding him past tomorrow with hubby on his quiet hack and hopefully banish the alpaca demons once and for all.

At first I felt like a bit of loser for getting off when I did but my sense of self preservation was too strong and I tried to turn it back into a positive, schooling opportunity. It was also my birthday and I didn’t fancy a trip to A+E that day!

I don’t think there is any shame in doing the safe and sensible thing...
 
Our anglo used to have episodes and always used to tell my now ex to hop off, lead for a bit then get back on. If you frighten yourself you achieve nothing, if she buries you she wins. For me there are times when you need to stay on board, and times when leading is best. I copped a lot of flack from people for getting off but the horse is now good to ride.
When safe, you could also face towards home and reverse her in the direction you want to go, I did this with a clients horse, and it worked a treat.
 
I would say you did the right thing. Knowing them roads well would say it was best to be safe than sorry. At least you both still ok to try another day. Glad blue improve and coming back into work.
 
Wot Parker79 said. I have only had to get off about 3 times in 11 years due to bad napping. I am convinced he was really scared on each occasion.

If I am out for a long hack, 3 hours plus I often get off and lead for a while anyway, so leading not associated with 'getting away with it'.
 
You definitely won!! At the first sign of trouble you should be off, and demanding sideways and/or backwards in a rhymic sequence....that gets the horses brain back into gear quicker than anything!! Tried it and it works - brilliantly!! So the only thing I would have done is the groundwork exercises rather than just leading forward!! Well done.
 
Alyth said:
You definitely won!! At the first sign of trouble you should be off, and demanding sideways and/or backwards in a rhymic sequence....that gets the horses brain back into gear quicker than anything!! Tried it and it works - brilliantly!! So the only thing I would have done is the groundwork exercises rather than just leading forward!! Well done.
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I'll try that next time (and there will be a next time!). My first instinct when I got off was just to turn her straight away in the direction we were supposed to be going in and to get her to go forwards that way - it didn't cross my mind to do some other groundwork exercises as well, so I will try to remember that when it happens again. Thanks
 
You did the right thing and got out of the war. There's no point whatsoever in practising your horse's 'no' and teaching her to get even better at napping. By getting off and going where you wanted to anyway, you engaged with her 'yes' or her 'maybe'. So much safer too.
 
Alyth said:
You definitely won!! At the first sign of trouble you should be off, and demanding sideways and/or backwards in a rhymic sequence....that gets the horses brain back into gear quicker than anything!! Tried it and it works - brilliantly!! So the only thing I would have done is the groundwork exercises rather than just leading forward!! Well done.
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I like this reply.
As soon as you feel that you are unsafe and the question 'should I get off?' enters your head, you should be off. The horse will be well aware of your feeling, probably before you.

Only an idiot will try to sit it out when they feel they want to get off, no matter who reckons otherwise. If you are confident enough to know that you can get the horse back listening to you once it has gone into flight mode, fair enough, but this has to be done quickly. There is no winnining and loseing, its having the techniques to deal with these eventualities.
 
Definitely did the right thing! No way is getting off a nappy horse, losing a battle. Quite the opposite. It gives your horse more respect and confidence in you. Nearly all nappy behaviour is fear based and down to lack of confidence. By getting off your horse to lead it, you are acknowledging her fears and not just dismissing them out of hand. She will gain more trust in you now that she knows you are listening to her, whilst she doesn't get her own way (to go home). You are saying 'I realise you are frightened. But I will walk by your side and show you there is nothing to fear. Then when you are calm, I will get back on and we can resume our journey.'
 
The horse wanted to to wimp out and go home, you got her to change her mind and do her work. You won, and you did it tactically without going through a big battle. Well done.

Hope things keep better for you both. :)

ETA, Disclaimer... With many horses and in many situations getting off is not the best course of action, not because the horse might learn a way to skive off by making you walk :rolleyes: but because it reduces control and increases the risk of losing the horse. In this case it sounds like the OP knows her horse and read the situation well.
 
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Sounds a win situation IMO - my daughter is doing this with her young horse, she has no hacking companions ATM so if she wants to get him out its just her and him. Had to dismount at a scary horse eating barrel that had been half blown in a ditch and to get through a fast flowing ford on Sunday. Plus its getting him used to standing still to be mounted out and about so another valuable lesson.
 
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