Emigration forces a decision..to share or loan?

grandmaweloveyou

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My beautiful boy. West Sussex. 14.3hh. Pretty much bombproof as you will know from all posts bar one when he spooked at a cow. So what do I do? Get a sharer for him with my partner, 3-4 days riding per week (fantastic private yard with school and awesome hacking) and spoilt for the help provided i.e he is fed morning and evening and turned out and brought in so no need (unless choosing to) adjust a normal persons working routine except for obviously preparing the feeds / nets and mucking out (straw - deep litter easy), or do I loan him completely? I am so torn. I cannot / will not sell him and want to know his progress and need unlimited access when I return to the UK (not often). He is showing marvellously and there is talk of CHAPs and HOYS etc so someone could really have fun. He now jumps and has a great dressage movement. Any thoughts? If sharing; is £25 + shoes acceptable - I would like a bit more to be honest? He is good on shoes, every 6-7 weeks. Advice needed PLEASE. Thank you.
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oh and another idea, what about a horse and house share ie move into my house with my partner who is staying in the uk (professional non smoking female) and share the horse with her? how ideal would that be for someone that cant quite afford to do it all on their own? any offers??!
 
If you want to hear my horror story of loaning a horse in the UK after I moved to the USA, PM me. He may be the love of your life, but unless you have someone you trust who can take over for you at the drop of a hat...Trust me. It's really difficult to try and sort out an unwanted horse, 3000 miles away with a 5 hour time difference.

When I moved I too didn't want to sell and wanted to keep tabs on him etc, etc. It doesn't work. Unless you are close enough to get there in a second and take him back, find a really nice new home and sell him. I am speaking from experience here. I currently have a horse who will no longer pass a vet on full livery in the UK, costing me $600 a month, which is more than what it would cost me to have him on full board here! (Don't you love the exchange rate). So please. Save yourself some heartache and have a really good think about this.

If you can find a sharer so he stays with your partner, then maybe it would work.

Good luck. I know what a difficult decision this is!
 
I'm a bit confused, are you just working abroad or going for good ? If going for good why not take him with you ? also if you are going and your partner is staying..............um....long distance relationship ????????
 
Having first shared and then loaned my horse when pregnant, I would say do neither if you ever want him back as you left him.
My sharer decided she no longer wanted to do my horse but very kindly did not bother telling me. Somebody on the yard called me to say he hadn't been done late one saturday evening. She eventually emailed me on a tuesday! He was then loaned to somebody I knew and who had lessons with my instructor, so she could keep an eye on him. Anyway, to cut a long story short, I got my horse back when my baby was 4 weeks old, after he'd been on loan for 10 weeks. It took me a whole year to get him back to the mannerly ride he was before I embarked on the whole thing.
Would I ever share/loan again? Never!
 
hayleycob - could be permanent but idea is that i shall flit between the two countries as i have so many ties here. would dearly love to take him but there is no way he could cope with the heat nor the flies, not in a million years, imagine a hairy sunburnt cob in 45degree heat. only wish i had bought a completely different type/breed. Re my partner, we are going our separate ways but never say never about trying again and we have too much together to let it all go but no, definitely not a long distance relationship, i dont believe in the absence makes the heart grow fonder phrase. Hope that has cleared that! Harv - yes sharer with partner may work with a view to possible long term loan IF sharer proves trustworthy, thank you. Quirky - hmmmmm hoping my partner will be strong enough to deal with the sharer and at the moment we aim for someone we know and trust but certainly wont rush into anything just yet. Thanks everyone. Tis so hard!
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If you are staying abroad, why not take him with you? the pound is so strong at the moment that it can buy more than you think! Agree with other posters that he is best being shared with your partner so you can keep more control than out on loan. Other options include a proper show yard having him on livery to produce him correctly for the showring - there are people like that on here eg someone like FMM - but its not always the cheapest option but its pretty safe! Good luck with whatever you do
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