Family Turmoil

minxymoo

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5 January 2007
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Hi
Just wanted your views on the following family dilemma?? Sorry I don't really frequent this forum very much so I probably don't warrant much input however, I shall continue...
My nephew is 14 he is just starting to compete in adults affiliated on a very talented little horse - His aim for the summer is to jump discovery - currently he is doing BN.
Before this he jumped relatively very little BUT is a very good rider.
Now here's the question, my sister now wants to take him out of school, get a private tutor, sell the house and fund him as a showjumper. My mum is alarmed - 1) his education, 2) my sister is not a hugely wealthy woman and even the sell of the house wouldn't buy top ranking show jumpers - 3) he should be getting experience jumping on ponies in juniors as he hasn't that much experience - do you think she is jumping the gun (excuse the pun) somewhat??
I am sitting on the fence (ho hum) and think well he's a good rider - would love him to go all the way to the top - how did many of them start - what do you guys think?? Have showjumpers made it with very little funds by bringing on young horses and sponsers? or do you think she's mad??
 
Sorry but I thgink she is mad! You say he is a good rider but how keen is he? Has he discovered girls yet?

In order to make it SJing you need to serve an apprenticship even Robert Whittikar went abroad and worked for a top SJer. Your nephew would need to go and work for a good Sjer this costs little money. If he is any good he may get the chance to bring on young horses and get more competition experience.

If by the time he 20 and is still keen has worked for other SJers then may be the time to help set him up in a yard. Now is complete and utter stupidy - sorry.

Hope what I said makes sense!
 
Tell me, did your sister ever harbour ambitions to be a show jumper herself? Sounds as if she's 'living vicariously', ie using the child to realise her own ambitions.
I agree with Sarah -Jane. Let him have his boyhood, & if he's still good & keen when he's about 20 ,has garnered some experience, & maybe made a bit of a name for himself, then help him set up his own yard. Also to pay a private tutor, fund a string of show-jumpers, & live is going to take more than the proceeds of the sale of a house!!!!
 
Firstly, yes I do think your sister is mad, I would if he was mine get an extra job or something.
Secondly, I would never take a child out of school, it is where they learn the most social skills
Thirdly, if he is 14 I wouldnt bother with jumping ponies, he would be better staying on horses.
Fourthly, god I am glad my sister hasnt got kids cos that is the sort of thing she would do!
Please dont take offence at anything I have put, you asked for my opinion and you got it!
smile.gif
 
If he is really talented, like many younsters i know,who compete in hols and weekends/afterschool it could easily be juggled. Kids need school for social skills as much as an education.
 
my sister is the same with our niece (not her daughter my brothers)
shes not gone to the extremes of selling the house but she is trying to live a dream through my niece.
she too is 14 she can ride but by no means is she a show jumper as shes too vacant if you know what i mean.
she is easily confused trying to get round a course of jumps, and the best round she had last year was when i took her and she had no pressure from me at all. she really enjoyed herself too, my sister pushes her far too hard and too fast if you know what i mean.

i went to work away at 17 i went to germany which is a better place to go imo as i felt i learnt a hell of a lot more than i would have here. i was having private free lessons from day 1 from my employer dr baumann (3 day eventer).
my friend went to work at john wittakers yard too for around 2 years, he too became a very good rider but he had to work himself up to get the rides. whereas i was just expected to ride from day one.

i think shes going ott atm as hes too young, give him a year or two and he will be wanting to be a normal teenager chasing the girls. hope you talk some sense into you sister as a roof over her sons head is much better than a horse.
 
Thanks guys for your advice, no one has offended me at all, some made me chuckle and it's nice to know other people's opinions - as I am sure yards around these parts chuckle behind their back but don't have the balls to say anything to my sister's face.
I will keep you posted.
Many thanks
 
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