Feel really down, completely lost confidence.

PinkCob

PinkCob

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Basically, a family friend and I are planning on bring a thoroughbred back into work after 3 or 4 years off work.
I've being bonding with her for a while, yesterday she followed me round the yard (it is small and private that's why she was out) and it really made my day. She comes when I call her and I managed to plait her tail yesterday. That doesn't sound much but she was fidgity and nervous when I first tried it and in the end she stood and let me without so much as a flinch.

Basically, soon i'll be starting her training and bringing her back into work. Lunging, tack on ect..
But someone told my mother yesterday that 'thoroughbred's are far too unpredictable, and they'll be worse after no work for years' - obviously I know this already, I know thoroughbreds and their personalities and how they can be.
But this women basically told my mother that 'The horse will be good when you get on her and as soon as she's on the road, BOOM, she'll spook at a pheasant and throw you off.'
Now, before anyone has a go at me, I knew that any horse can spook and although I know this it has really knocked me for six.

My confidence has plummeted and I think that I can't cope with her and that I will fall off and break my neck. I know if I think like this when I get on, I will fall off.

My friends who have seen me ride say that i'm a good rider. I have stayed on buckers, rearers and ones that have taken off with me. But honestly, I now feel like i'm completely rubbish.

I'm not looking for pity or anything like that. I just want some advice on how I can resolve this problem.

So, please help me.


Ice cream if you read this far! :}
 
I am sorry that this has knocked your confidence...

I only have 1 thing to say...

IGNORE THE WOMAN and bring the animal back into work!
 
Well to tar the entire tb breed as spooky shoes how much this woman knows.
So long as yoi are sensible, take it slowly and get help before you do something you aren't sure about ignore her!
 
I know thoroughbreds that are more chilled and less spooky than my welsh cob :)
Don't judge by the breed! If you are worried about taking her on a hack try it inhand first, then you will she if she's spooky/nervous and know what you are dealing with when you first get on.
 
This women is like a 60 year old, who's had horses all her life. She knows them inside out. It's the first time i'll have broken a horse in or re-backed. But it's just got me thinking, should I start on something more placid? Ie, a novicey pony or cob?
 
Pinkcob.... you haven't even so much as got tack on this lovely horse and you are already panicking.

Don't let this lady's words eat you up inside. Turn it into a challenge. You know you are a good rider. You say so yourself yet you now doubt your own instincts... how can you give trust to this horse when you have no trust in yourself?

This is not you talking, it's the lady who has made you question your own worth.

Snap out of it dear, shake it off and believe in what you can do!!!! :):):)

A spook is just a spook, show the horse she has nothing to fear, YOU are there! :)

p.s. a tb spook is not as bad as a cob spook!!!! :D
 
tallyho! said:
Pinkcob.... you haven't even so much as got tack on this lovely horse and you are already panicking.

Don't let this lady's words eat you up inside. Turn it into a challenge. You know you are a good rider. You say so yourself yet you now doubt your own instincts... how can you give trust to this horse when you have no trust in yourself?

This is not you talking, it's the lady who has made you question your own worth.

Snap out of it dear, shake it off and believe in what you can do!!!! :):):)

A spook is just a spook, show the horse she has nothing to fear, YOU are there! :)

p.s. a tb spook is not as bad as a cob spook!!!! :D
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Thank you TallyHo! Wise words. It's wierd because when i'm with the horse my nerves vanish. When i'm away I get panicky and start doubting myself. I'm not good with people b*tching about me. haha!
 
PinkCob said:
This women is like a 60 year old, who's had horses all her life. She knows them inside out. It's the first time i'll have broken a horse in or re-backed. But it's just got me thinking, should I start on something more placid? Ie, a novicey pony or cob?
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Nowt so queer as folk :rolleyes:

If she as knowledgeable as either she claims or you believe, then she wouldn't be tarring all horses With the same brush. A friend has an ex-racer. A couple of years off. He's now being ridden by her thirteen year old daughter, who is doing very nicely :D

Treat the horse as the individual it is lass.
 
Paris1 said:
Does the woman know your particular horses personality? And perhaps why it has been out of work?
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No she doesn't. She just knows of it, if you get me.
It is out of work because it used to buck and the owner stopped riding it due to lack of time and personal commitments. I'm willing to get on her and give it a shot but I can't shake this feeling of dread and the thought of breaking my neck.
 
MrsMozart said:
Nowt so queer as folk :rolleyes:

If she as knowledgeable as either she claims or you believe, then she wouldn't be tarring all horses With the same brush. A friend has an ex-racer. A couple of years off. He's now being ridden by her thirteen year old daughter, who is doing very nicely :D

Treat the horse as the individual it is lass.
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Wise words MrsMozart.
'Treat the horse as the individual it is lass.' can I use this as my motto mrs mozart? :)
 
PinkCob said:
No she doesn't. She just knows of it, if you get me.
It is out of work because it used to buck and the owner stopped riding it due to lack of time and personal commitments. I'm willing to get on her and give it a shot but I can't shake this feeling of dread and the thought of breaking my neck.
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Do you know why she bucked? If it's pain and you have eliminated that trigger, there is no reason why she should buck again in response to that particular stimulus.

Be gentle, take everything into consideration and give yourselves time. There is no rush and it's more important to get it right than to do do it on time.
 
If she knows the horse by reputation, and its reputation is it bucked so badly it hasn't been worked for 3 years, I would tread carefully. Get help and be honest with yourself if you feel you have bitten off more than you can chew.
Could be the rider was timid and a little buck scared her and you wouldn't have been phased!
A friend of mine got rid of her pony as it consistently bucked her off and was petrified of it. I rode it and it never bucked once. Sometimes its a chicken and egg situation.
Anyway I
 
I was told she bucked when she was out hunting or jumping, which is understandable. As horses get excited when out hunting.
Oh yes, her owner is a hunting lover! :D
 
MrsMozart said:
You certainly can lass :D

As others have said, check for pain and tack issues, then take it slowly and in little steps.

Look forward to hearing how it goes :)
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Thanks m'dear. I will keep you all posted for sure!
I thought about pain, i've felt over her and I can't find any obvious pain but I can't be sure. I just hope she doesn't start being a muppet on the lunge line with her tack on! hehe!
 
Some people just like the sound of their own voices and have to give an opinion on every subject they know about - especially horsey ladies, I'm afraid!
Take a friend with you and slowly start bringing the horse back into work, in your own time. Even if that means only riding for 15 minutes to begin with. And take him for walks on the road. Good luck!
 
Nowt so queer as folk!

Give yourself most chance if success, so time, patience and not letting others judge success by timescales.

Deep breath and step by step. She may well be a muppet on the lunge. But so What? Just Don't get on till you feel you have control and obedience on the lunge! You don't have to jump on in 10 mins to prove anything.

If there is a suspicion of pain, get her checked over. I'm afraid running your hands over her won't necessarily spot it. So start with teeth etc checked so you know all is well.

Have someone you trust who knows what they're doing as back up for advice.

And enjoy it! It doesn't matter if it takes 12 weeks or 12 months, relax and remember breathe and enjoy x
 
You can live for a hundred years and not know everything about horses, if she has no knowledge of the horse before and is making this sweeping statement, shes not as knowledgable as you think she is.
My only concern is that if one comment has you this rattled, are you sure you are up to the job ? If you are and have support and help go for it. Id get her checked over by the vet before starting to rule out any pain issues.
Look at and feel what the horse is doing, and work with what you get and what you know, take it slow and see what happens, dont make problems before you start, deal with them as they arise.
If you are unsure of anything, seek advice from someone knowledgable in backing and reschooling, its not a weakness to ask for help, it shows youre recognising a limitation and working through it by learning from a more experienced person. Good luck and keep us posted
 
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When you ride, wear a body protector and put the hoss in a neckstrap so you've got something to grab in case of a nerve attack from you or her!

Secondly, all horses can be spooky. If she's been out of racing a long old time, she'll have likely lost her racing mentality somewhat. And look at her personality- is she bold and brave or is she more of a shrinking violet? Reg is generally pretty chilled and sensible and he rarely spooks out hacking- Al got back on him after 4 months off chilling in a field and they mooched back to the stables on a long rein... And he's always been like that. And you've taken things a lot slower- Al just got straight on Reg and kicked on :O
 
All horses are different! I know of a cob who spooked, napped and refused to box, despite being sent away for retraining and having all pain issues ruled out. Friend now has a sweet ex.racer who is a saint!

I would get a chiropractor or physio to check out her back, you do need to be an expert to spot problems. I was told that my current mare (ex.polo tb) had been known to rear, flybuck and was difficult to box. Scared the bejaysus out of me before I got on! I've had her a year now and she's never done anything - I get the impression she had been bullied out of her comfort zone and reacted out of fear. So I never pushed her, just kept patient and calm and we now trust each other.
 
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