Feeling a bit useless really

Gorgeous George

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My clear round jumping today didn't happen basically because I lost my bottle
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although I wasn't due to go until 4.30 I was nervous at lunchtime today
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I went up the yard with the plan of having a good ride in the school before we went, so on I got in the driving rain and George spotted the geese who were swimming in the puddle that had formed next to the menage
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and nearly lost the plot. I walked him round a couple of times and then pathetically got off and gave up
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I do want to do it even if it's only little jumps, but I just worry about whether George will get over excited, or if I will fall off etc etc.

I did go up to watch the clear round and thought that maybe I could have done it, and I bumped into my instructor and she said she would take me one Mon (will have to organise some a/l) and ride George first, so there's a plan. Just feel a bit pathetic today
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Still love my boy though
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You are not pathetic, the fact youre even thinking about doing the clear round jumping proves that and you've got a picture of you in your sig cantering in an open field which shows how brave you are in my eyes
Theres no rush to do these things, dont' put any pressure on yourself and do it when you feel ready.
 
Hey don't feel so bad. You have done so much with George just lately and come a long way. You should be proud of yourself.

You will do it one day so don't worry about it too much
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Not a good idea anyway, riding in the driving rain with some scarey geese swimming about, when you're already feeling nervous. At least you tried, I would have bottled out altogether with this weather. I'm sure you'll do fine when the weather is better and it's a good idea to watch someone ride George first so you can see how he is likely to react.
 
Well really just take some sedaline hop on and go for it and stop messing around.
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Only joking you'll get there. One day you won't have time to think about it. The opportunity will just present itself and you'll do it.
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Well done for all you've acheived lately.
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Don't beat yourself up, I've lost my bottle loads of times especially jumping and I still get very wobbly. From your posts it sounds as though you are having fun and that's the main reason for having your horsey. You've got all summer to practice jumping and going to shows to have a go. Todays weather wasn't in your favour either so give George a lovely big kiss and start again tomorrow xxxxxx
 
You are not pathetic at all.
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I think it might be good to have some interim goals and the jumping at shows at the top of your list. Don't feel the need to rush. It may be that you need to repeat the interim steps several times before you are ready to move up a stage.
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The main thing is to enjoy yourself and don't make comparisons with others. Riding is meant to be fun??!
 
If you didn't get nervous you wouldn't be human! and no you haven't lost your bottle in any shape or form, this is just a small blip in the life you are making for you and George.
I wouldn't think of all the what if George gets excited, what if I come off as none of us have a crystal ball and no one can see what is going to happen in the future.
I do know that you and George have come a long way since you got him, and I know for a fact that this time next year you will look back and go OMG was I really stressing about jumping a small CR! Was only 8months ago I walked round Eland Lodge mini HT and jumped the rest when got overtaken and couldn't hold Pidge back
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Two weeks ago we cantered round the whole lot and jumped clear and came 9th out of 42
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Still can't quite believe the difference in such a short time really.
So the moral of the story is take each day as it comes, one step at a time and most importantly do things at the pace and height you are comfortable with. I have learnt a very important lesson in not to push myself if I'm not sure as when I do it all falls apart and then I feel like s**t
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It was not meant to be for whatever reason today but please please don't beat yourself up over it you are so not pathetic
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You musn't give yourself grief, these things happen, next time it will feel right for you!! I think you are doing really well, reading the posts from you so keep up the good work and don't be despondent!
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Oh dear - poor you! I totally know where you are coming from!
Whenever I jump in the field my mare always slows down then she gets near the exit gate.

Have you thought about just trying one little jump to start with, perhaps going towards the gate of the field? Do one then get off - I did and thought it wasn't so bad and did it again.

Its only your confidence that's stopping you!
 
I jump at home on my lessons and I'm doing ok, only little stuff but ok and George is lovely
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it's the whole going somewhere in a lorry and having to contend with other horses in a strange place that does my head in
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I agree with Pinkwellies2 that you're a lot braver than you think - look at you in your sig cantering in the middle of that massive field!! If I did that with Adrian, I'd get bucked off in about 5 seconds.

I'd also agree that the weather wasn't really helping you. Everything will seem so much easier on a hot, sleepy sort of day.

And don't forget that Mr Lungeing Rein is your friend if you want to work off some excess energy. If it makes you feel better, when I had a young WBxTB, I'd ride/lunge before we left, then when we got to the show my o/h (cos he's heavier & stronger than me) would lunge for sometimes 45 mins to an hour before the wretched thing would stop behaving like a lunatic. Then I'd get on *on the lunge still* like a beginner.... and sometimes I'd get off a few times because I didn't like my chances of staying on.

We did this routine for prob a year, so had to choose shows where we could get a loooong way away from other horses.

There is no shame in adapting your strategy to suit circumstances. You will get there!!!
 
Oh I'm just glad I'm not the only one feeling a bit useless today (I cancelled my lesson due to the weather).

You really have absolutely NO reason though to feel pathetic. You are one of the people on this forum who has really inspired me. I read about your confidence issues then the next time it will be a post about how you achieved something marvellous!

This means that very soon we will be reading about how George took you round the clear - round and you can't understand why you ever felt nervous cos it was such fun!

You are well ahead of me on achievements - I am still working towards my first dressage test with Jerry and I have only popped him over a single 18" fence once in our field. You are progressing so fast with George, slowing down a bit won't hurt - it'll give us a chance to catch up!!
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The weather was really horrid today & not many people would have wanted to go out in that. Don't worry, you'll get there. Hopefully the geese will go back to the fishing lake when it stops raining
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I think watching someone else jump him round before you have a go is a great idea.
How did the course look when you went up to watch?
 
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it's the whole going somewhere in a lorry and having to contend with other horses in a strange place that does my head in


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Why don't you have a go at just taking him to have a look next time there is a show on, without competing ... this will take some of the pressure off you both and you will see how it likes going out to a party
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hun, you did better than I did..... I lost the bottle about the time I was about to hook the trailer up, so yet again didn't go to clear round jumping
 
Trish, I think you were brave even considering it in this kind of weather!! We decided yesterday not to go!
It would be much more enjoyable for both you and George on a nicer day - especially for your first go.
Getting your instructor to jump him round first is a great idea - you'll be able to see for yourself that he is going to be fine before you do it yourself
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Trish, the point is, you DO want to do it, and you WILL do it, when the time is right, and today was not the right time.

There is no rush, you have a plan, and you will take it from there, you have come so far already, you are making progress all the time, you have so much to be proud of.

At least you are working through your fears and tackling any problems as they arise - look at me, I have had to send my ponio away to Horse Borstal - not something to be proud of!!!

I think you are amazing, and George thinks you are the best Mum in the world.
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I think going with your instructor is a good idea.

I'll let you into a secret...I used to do bigger things. Not really big like badminton but thought nothing of jumping a 3'6 crosscountry/sj course. Yesterday the 2ft jumps looked huge!!! So i jumped the baby ones! Think ive been doing too much dressage! or maybe im just getting older! LOL!!

The good thing about this country and horses is there is a niche for everyone! have you joined your local riding club? That is a really good place to start and you will find you are not the only one who is worried about jumping. You will also get support to have a go.
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Have to say its not the best weekend for doing anything - the weather has been terrible. There will be other days when conditions are much better and you will do it. Better to wait until you feel the time is right, than to force yourself to go before you are ready. Sounds like a good plan with your instructor so you have a way forwards and it will all come together in time.
 
I think you did the right thing listening to your instincts. It's supposed to be fun for you as well as George. There will be many more clear rounds in future and in better weather conditions than today.
 
You know someone said to me earlier in the year that I tried too hard and that's why I wasn't enjoying riding/my horse.

i think you're far too hard on yourself! Who cares that you got off? Better to do that than be a bag of nerves in the ring. You've only just started jumping again so take it easy and enjoy the process of gaining confidence in yourself and George!

Good luck
 
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