Feeling really really down in the dumps :-(

skychick

skychick

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Not a good week at all.

Since getting my new horse in march he has proved that he is not the quiet well behaved horse that he was sold as.
He napps (badly if he wants to)
he will do a very good mini rear, buck, spin combination. His bucks are very powerfull.
This wasnt too much of an issue i am (was?) a very confident rider with enough years of experience to handle it.
Things were progressing hacking wise.

We went to the fun ride on sunday which was so disasterous i am lucky not to be more bashed about than i am. He leapt and plunged the whole 4 hours we were out. Not just in an exciteable way but in a dangerous way. After 2 or so hours i finally came off smacking my head hard and my pelvis. I got on and he had me off a further two times, one time smacking my arm on a rock, the next time i fell under him and he trampled me.
I wasnt at all scared at the time.....just maybe a little fed up with his antics by the time i got home.
I had minor concussion and tonnes of bruising etc and could barely move untill thursday, so i didnt ride untill then. When i rode on thurs it was only for about 15 mins as i was too sore. But i felt really nervous just walking and trotting around the school :-(
I rode yesterday for about 40 mins (as much as my hips/back could take) and walked, trotted, cantered and jumped but still felt nervous :-(
I think i have lost my confidence a bit which is really unlike me. And paddy is the sort of horse to pick up on that and play up. He didnt.....but if he was in that frame of mind he would and i think that was in the back of my mind.

Im really thinking about selling him (hopefully to a previous owner of his who had a fantastic relationship with him)(she is still deciding if she can have him back).
I feel really down in the dumps. I have worked really hard with him over the last 4 months and things were getting better. But that fun ride was literally no fun at all and now my confidence is dented.
The person who may have him back works with problem horses and she has offered to come down a few times and help me work with him and get him to focus his attention on me and not everything else like he does. But she lives over 2 hours away.
I feel like i am giving up too easily, but i work 6 long days a week and my horse was meant to be a bit of a break from work etc to get out and de stress (which on a good day with paddy it does) but perfect days with paddy are few and far between. So i really dont have time for a "project" horse.
But i love him to pieces and will be really upset to let him go.
Although he is totally not the horse i set out to get when i bought him (due to the person selling him totally lying through their teeth). I wanted a horse i could hack out with no problems of an evening and do a bit of schooling and hack to the odd local show.

I keep thinking that i should keep him and work with him, but part of me thinks that a) i could end up getting seriously hurt if i try and take him to events again. b) he could be happier with this girl who had an amazing relationship with him and did literally everything with him and c) am i going to have the time/energy to try and get him going nicely (he has been difficult pretty much from the word go - i have traced him back to his first owner).

Sorry really pointles rambling post but i am feeling so :-( over the whole thing.
 
I'm sorry that you're having such a tough time, I know how it is to be struggling with a new horse (though not quite to the extent you're dealing with) and it can be really stressful and disheartening. It sounds to me as if letting him go to the previous owner would be ideal if she will take him, especially as you would know he was going to someone who will love him and care for him. If this doesn't happen then maybe you could try for another few weeks, perhaps getting her to come down once to give you some advice on how to deal with him (sounds as if she's kind and willing to do so).

Then maybe consider a few lessons with an instructor who will be able to set you straight on everything and help you out. My instructor just came to my house this week to help me with my mare because she lost the plot and I couldn't even get on her. Just one session made me feel so much better about the whole situation and now I feel that I can face up to the issues and deal with them. Having said that, if the situation does not improve with some help then I think perhaps he is not the horse for you, especially when you are busy with work and want a horse to relax with and enjoy. There is certainly no shame in giving him up to someone with more time and then you can move on to give a loving home to a horse more suited to you. Good luck and put a smile back on your face, this sort of thing is happening to the best of us... ;)
 
Fatty did all of those things when I first bought him...and the rest!

I think he was having a horsey nervous breakdown, I turned him away for a couple of months to get his head straight. Then when I brought him back we did lots of natural horsemanship type groundwork so he came to respect me as a leader on the ground [no chifney, no whips]

It was really looooong process but I'm glad I stuck it out, we really love each other [I think? at least i love him]. But we had to change Everything - saddle, bridle, bit, routine, feed, work schedule.

er...not sure how this helps but I think there's a nugget of hope in here somewhere
 
Oh no! so sorry to hear you are having problems :( It's horrible having to make that decision, I nearly gave up on Worm and sold her.
If it's knocking your confidence then it may not be worth it, however it may be worth getting all of the usual checks done in case he's trying to tell you he's sore (not that I want to insult you, I'm sure you know all of that)
Don't feel too down though, it happens to everybody and is sometimes unavoidable, and if you feel he would be better off going back then it's a pretty brave thing to admit, I'm not sure I would :) It may be worth sticking with it though, sometimes the best relationships take the most work so it might just pay off to keep at it.
I don't know whether it would be of any use to you, but Catherine Edwards did a communication with Worm and discovered why she was behaving the way she was, and totally changed our relationship, ridden and just generally, from having a horse who spent our rides bucking and rearing and spinning etc to one that works with me and is now back competing.
Either way, good luck, let us know how you go.
xx
 
Hey hollywoozle, how are things with belle now?

To be honest....my horse is on livery at my instructors yard. Her honest opinion, i am very lucky, if you want an honest opinion she will give you one, no beating about the bush! and she thinks i should let him go to either his previous owner or sell him exceptionally honestly. She reckons i have tried more than anyone else ever would.

Its still hard though when you get emotionally attached.

Im just hopeing he will go to his previous owner then i know he would have a safe home for life. Otherwise i know he will be passed from pillar to post to probably mr meat man.

Fingers crossed she will have him back.

But am dreading the next pony hunt!!!!
 
Let me know if there's anything I can do to help. I don't work Wednesday afternoons and am free every weekend, so I can always plod over to yours if you want to go hacking any time?

Jazzy was brilliant on our ride this morning - went out with a very steady (ploddy!) youngster and stayed with her pretty much all the way round, despite having had 10 days off!

Jazzy walks incredibly quickly so it won't take me long to get over to yours. Let me know xx
 
Most of what you were describing before the fun ride sounds quite typical of horses in new homes, and some settle quicker than others.

The fun ride is a different thing - my personal view is that fun rides are anything but - the field isn't fast enough to keep your horse occupied but there is just too much excitement - I don't do them at all
 
fattysmum said:
Fatty did all of those things when I first bought him...and the rest!

I think he was having a horsey nervous breakdown, I turned him away for a couple of months to get his head straight. Then when I brought him back we did lots of natural horsemanship type groundwork so he came to respect me as a leader on the ground [no chifney, no whips]

It was really looooong process but I'm glad I stuck it out, we really love each other [I think? at least i love him]. But we had to change Everything - saddle, bridle, bit, routine, feed, work schedule.

er...not sure how this helps but I think there's a nugget of hope in here somewhere
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I have changed his saddle, made sure he has a stable routine, he is not over or under worked, he is not being over fed/under fed. He has had a full mot from the vet, his back checked, his teeth done, a new saddle fitted by 2 different people.
I have done quite a bit of ground work with him and he does respect me on the ground. I dont use any gadgets (i.e chiffneys etc). I carry a whip but dont use it on him apart from the odd tickle behind my leg if he starts running backwards. If you use a whip on him he gets really evil.
I know i probably should work with him, but as he is 12 years old and has spent his whole life being difficult, i could still be in the same position in a years time.
 
Eriskayowner said:
Let me know if there's anything I can do to help. I don't work Wednesday afternoons and am free every weekend, so I can always plod over to yours if you want to go hacking any time?

Jazzy was brilliant on our ride this morning - went out with a very steady (ploddy!) youngster and stayed with her pretty much all the way round, despite having had 10 days off!

Jazzy walks incredibly quickly so it won't take me long to get over to yours. Let me know xx
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Thank you ever so much for all of your offers of help. At the mo, im going to build my confidence back up in the school.....and get a little bit less sore!! Then will try hacking out.
Your horse sounds like an absolute star! xx
 
the watcher said:
Most of what you were describing before the fun ride sounds quite typical of horses in new homes, and some settle quicker than others.

The fun ride is a different thing - my personal view is that fun rides are anything but - the field isn't fast enough to keep your horse occupied but there is just too much excitement - I don't do them at all
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I dont blame you lol!!
 
skychick said:
Hey hollywoozle, how are things with belle now?

To be honest....my horse is on livery at my instructors yard. Her honest opinion, i am very lucky, if you want an honest opinion she will give you one, no beating about the bush! and she thinks i should let him go to either his previous owner or sell him exceptionally honestly. She reckons i have tried more than anyone else ever would.

Its still hard though when you get emotionally attached.

Im just hopeing he will go to his previous owner then i know he would have a safe home for life. Otherwise i know he will be passed from pillar to post to probably mr meat man.

Fingers crossed she will have him back.

But am dreading the next pony hunt!!!!
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I tacked Belle up with instructor on Wednesday and got on her just for a walk about the field. Instructor set me straight on everything and now I know just what I need to be doing. Then instructor came again yesterday and we walked down to the nearby school, where I usually meet her for my lessons, and did a little bit of schooling with no problems. I'm hopeful. :) Thanks for asking.

If your instructor thinks the best thing is to sell him then it sounds as though that is your best bet to be honest. I can imagine it would be upsetting when emotionally attached but it could well be the best thing for both of you and potentially in his best interests as well as yours. Hold out to see what his previous owner decides and then you can go from there.

As for the pony hunt... we love a good search on here so I'm sure there are plenty of us that would help you look if it comes to it. :)
 
HollyWoozle said:
I tacked Belle up with instructor on Wednesday and got on her just for a walk about the field. Instructor set me straight on everything and now I know just what I need to be doing. Then instructor came again yesterday and we walked down to the nearby school, where I usually meet her for my lessons, and did a little bit of schooling with no problems. I'm hopeful. :) Thanks for asking.

If your instructor thinks the best thing is to sell him then it sounds as though that is your best bet to be honest. I can imagine it would be upsetting when emotionally attached but it could well be the best thing for both of you and potentially in his best interests as well as yours. Hold out to see what his previous owner decides and then you can go from there.

As for the pony hunt... we love a good search on here so I'm sure there are plenty of us that would help you look if it comes to it. :)
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Thats great that things are going better with belle. Really good to hear.

I think alot depends on what his previous owner says. If she would like him back, it would be the best home he could probably ever have. She only sold him because she wanted to go on further with eventing so needed something bigger. She has another horse that she will compete with and will get paddy right again before letting someone hack him out with her.

Lol, if there is to be a new pony hunt.........you will all be the first to know! :-D
 
I think your safety has to be paramount, your fun ride ended up in some luckily not lasting injuries but it could have been different by the sound of it and what you had to contend with on that ride. Understandably it would effect your confidence a great deal. My pony took a good year to settle but didn't have me off deliberately at all and was quite predictable in what he would do when he had a paddy, mainly taking off when being led or napping when out :rolleyes:. One of the best bits of advice I had when we started having problems was to have a good long hard think about whether or not he was the horse for me. I could honestly say he was and I just had to up my game as he was trying to be a bit dominant over me and test the boundaries (and I knew from his previous owner who did teach me for a while it was probably naughtiness and lack of confidence as with her, a seasoned firm rider, he hadn't done such things). We managed to tackle our confidence issues and after that first year I knew we were there. I'm sorry that you've put so much hard work in and still having problems. It sounds like you're getting good advice from your RI too so you're doing as much as you can to sort things. I don't know when to say enough is enough for you as don't know you or your horse and it does sound like you are very attached to your chap but the enjoyment level or progress you're making needs to start increasing a bit to make all the tougher times worthwhile and you can see light at the end of the tunnel.
 
MochaDun said:
I think your safety has to be paramount, your fun ride ended up in some luckily not lasting injuries but it could have been different by the sound of it and what you had to contend with on that ride. Understandably it would effect your confidence a great deal. My pony took a good year to settle but didn't have me off deliberately at all and was quite predictable in what he would do when he had a paddy, mainly taking off when being led or napping when out :rolleyes:. One of the best bits of advice I had when we started having problems was to have a good long hard think about whether or not he was the horse for me. I could honestly say he was and I just had to up my game as he was trying to be a bit dominant over me and test the boundaries (and I knew from his previous owner who did teach me for a while it was probably naughtiness and lack of confidence as with her, a seasoned firm rider, he hadn't done such things). We managed to tackle our confidence issues and after that first year I knew we were there. I'm sorry that you've put so much hard work in and still having problems. It sounds like you're getting good advice from your RI too so you're doing as much as you can to sort things. I don't know when to say enough is enough for you as don't know you or your horse and it does sound like you are very attached to your chap but the enjoyment level or progress you're making needs to start increasing a bit to make all the tougher times worthwhile and you can see light at the end of the tunnel.
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I think this is one of the things. He is quite unpredictable in general. Some days you can go to the yard and he is quiet as a mouse and you can go for a nice hack with someone or go in the school and have no issues.
Others you get to the yard and he is all fired up, is a pain in the stable, literally moving about all the time. Wont stand still and if you leave him to go and get your tack he will rear on the end of his headcollar and lead rope and yank backwards on it. You will then go in the school and there will be some mini rearing and spinning or you go out for a hack and he will spook at everything and i mean everything.
(although....i seemed to have cured the rearing whilst tied up thing by not actually tying the lead rope, so when he either rears or yanks back it just pulls through the string and he doesnt get the desired result)

But you never know which paddy you will get when you get to the yard.

Because of his antics on the fun ride i have lost the support of my OH and my dad. Me and my dad are partners in business and as i said, i work 6 long days a week and the only way i can have a horse is because my dad will cover me when i want to have a lesson., the vet out, go to a show etc. He is really really good like that. But....he has seen paddy giving me hell once out on the road when he was napping and he heard independantly from someone else on the fun ride as to how bad he was, and saw me that evening when i was concussed and battered to hell, and so now he is not at all happy with me riding him and has said that he wont cover me for shows etc as he thinks its too dangerous to take paddy there. So that makes things alot more difficult for me.

I have literally tried everything i can to try and get things better. But he is one of those horses that you sort one thing and he finds a new tactic.

When i first had him, he would nap and spin and throw in the biggest buck possible. which the first couple of times had me off. (then my RI basically banned me from hacking him out alone) so i did lots of riding with a friend before going back to working him alone. Mainly from the ground at first then ridden. By this point i could sit to any buck he threw at me and so then....he stopped bucking and started mini rearing and bunny hopping and literally running backwards into whatever, whether it was a wall, up a hedge, into a ditch, into someones garden gate etc. Which actually worked to his disadvatage.....they are much easier to sit to!!!! But anyone who thinks going backwards is dificult for a horse....meet paddy!!! he can go as fast backwards as he can trot forwards.
He was alos a complete pain when he did nap, he would spin and face home. But if you tried to turn him he would not bend and would resist turning at any price.
So.....back to the inhand work and i would lead him out. I would go for about a mile out of the yard then turn for home, then walk back to the yard and then turn away from the yard and carry on on our hack/walk. I did this alot as well as stopping without turning around. And just loads and oads of circles in the road.
So back to the ridden work and this really helped, he was much less resistant to turn.

All of this was whilst i was doing lots of schooling work in the school. Loads and loads of transitions. Lots of walk to halt and standing still. Lots of circles, whether it was 20 m, 15m 10 m etc in walk, trot and canter. Followed by more transitions and pole work to keep it interesting.

So by the time we went to the fun ride i was feeling more positive....apart from the technique he started of literally just sticking his head to the floor and taking the reins out of my hands.

At the fun ride he did this alot. I had all sorts of advice like...."yank him in the mouth and take his back teeth out etc". Smack him one. Kick him on and smack him.
Then the leaping and plunging started and he combined this with the rein snatching on landing. I gave him a good telling off. I tried doing nothing and just re gather my reins andgive a good pony club kick to make him move on. I tried growling at him. I tried turning him and holding just one rein.....that resulted in him pulling the bith through his mouth on numerous occasions.
I tried notting my reins. He nearly snapped them!. I tried having no contact at all. Nothing at all would stop him from doing it.

I thought he would just be like it whilst we were off road. But even when we were on the road he would do this and once in front of a landrover pulling a horsebox. I thought we were gonna land on top of it at that point.

Once i had come of a couple of times 2 thirds of the way around the fun ride, he had learnt that 2 massive leaps/plunges and rein snatches in colse succession means i come off and he has won (even if i did get back on every time and continue riding him - well untill the last mile that was road so i lead him for my own safety).

So.....i wanst able to sort out that trick and i know he will try it again. Maybe not hacking out at home, but in the school he might and also if i take him to a show/xc schooling he will no doubt at all try it on again and thats going to be at the back of my mind.


But he doesnt care about hurting himself when he does it eiether. By the time we were home the other day he had cut his mouth to shreads from snatching his reins the whole time. But still he snatched.
He doesnt care if there are people/other horses in the way when he plays up, he just ploughs through them....although he nevr ever kicks (luckily neither d o my friends horses!).

Its possible that he can be sorted out. The girl that would have him back got him going well and not doing any of these antics but there was one owner between her and me that allowed him to get this bad.
I could probably work through them......but tbh i have given it one seriously seriously good go so far.

Its all a bit of a mess! We cure one problem then he finds another.
 
Sorry that has turned into the biggest essay....but whenever i try and discuss it with my oh/parents etc i just burst into tears.....so its much easier typing it all out!

And also, it doesnt help that my previous horse was a bit difficult too!

He would hack anywhere and for miles and miles and miles.....but only alone. He wouldnt live/hack or do anything with others. If i tried to hack him with others he would get completely stupid, serously strong and would spend the whole time trying to kick/double barrel them!
At shows he was ok, but MEGA strong and het up. I did shows with him....but they wernt as fun as they could be! That said...he is nothing as naughty as paddy....you just couldnt stop.
I couldnt do fun rides/xc schooling with him because he would literally rip my arms out of my sockets due to his strength! so this horse was meant to be to have some fun on!

This horse i am having problems with was sold as a happy hacker/jumping pony! which is excellent....i love hacking and schooling and LOVE jumping! I was told he was good on fun rides, hacking alone (of which i did hack him round the little block on his own). I was told he didnt get silly or buck/rear/anything nasty. I was told that he was only being sold as she had to focus on her gcse's. which was a lie too, she was too scared to ride him anymore it transpired!
 
It sounds to me as though you've put in a lot of effort and are understandably coming to the end of your tether. I think selling him would be the right thing to do, just vet the new home as best you can (if it's not his previous owner) and then you will have done the best by him. If he's behaving like this then I guess he's not happy either and perhaps would suit a different rider better, not that you aren't capable but sounds as though you're just not clicking with him as one would hope.

I really am sorry that you're having such a tough time and good on you for having come this far. It could just be that he would need more time to settle in but if the previous owners struggled too and he has become a danger, it sounds as though it's something in his nature which needs taking on by someone with more time. :)
 
You have hit the nail on the head , you have traced his history back and hes been like this , so its his personality and ways , do you think seller knew this ?It would be excellent if she takes him back and you get another.Did your instructer go with you ? If she had used this horse for eventing, etc, or cross country maybe he enjoys this and got excited at the ride thinking he was going to gallop round jumps? I always down my riding when riding any horse i find its better to underhorse yourself .Its hard to be confident on something you dont feel safe on ,and are not positive about and you have your instructers advice who knows you and horse and if you are happy with her advice, no one can tell you otherwise .Sell the horse, how is he with your instructer ? Weve all been there sorry to say and its best to let go and move on and geta suitable mount you enjoy and dont get stressed over
 
Reading that response I think you've probably given it your best shot with him, and it's unfortunate that the good work the previous owner did with him was then undone by the last owner and they weren't honest with you and you're back to square one with him. I think when it's impacting on your life like that you have to review and if the previous owner who wants to get him back on track will have him that might be the best route. Your OH and Dad are only concerned for your safety and understandably so considering what this horse does. And it's not nice for either you or the horse for these issues of his behaviour to keep continuing, a cut mouth is one thing but if he loses the plot so badly on the road too he could end up in a car with you, him and innocent people seriously injured if not worse. I feel genuinely sorry for you as it's a horrible position to be in having to let go of him but I think you possibly deserve a better horse this time round so you can enjoy yourself a bit more and make progress in the way you would want. Let's hope the previous owner who can work with him can turn things round for him and that she'll have him back so you and he can enjoy horsey life again! Chin up..
 
If it helps, I was once told, horses seem to regress to their old patterns of behaviour with each new owner. To an extent anyway.

If it was my child's horse, I would be forbidding them to ride it too, I'm afraid. And I really do have all the sympathy in the world for the horse. After all, eating in the field, he's a perfectly fine horse, isn't he? He just doesn't want to consistently behave well for people.

I'm not going to say PTS - the return to the girl who got on with him seems ideal - as she knows full well what he can do and it's eyes wide open. Otherwise, Lord only knows what the third option might be.

Sorry, been no help at all, but you have my admiration for determination combined with rationality and more bravery than I think is actually sensible!
 
brighteyes said:
Sorry, been no help at all, but you have my admiration for determination combined with rationality and more bravery than I think is actually sensible!
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Thank you brighteyes. You have been more than helpfull so thanks to everyone who has commented.. By getting it all off of my chest and having people listen and comment in a helpful and non judgemental way and without just saying "give him a bloody good smack he is taking the mickey", has helped me to get my head a bit straighter about what to do for the best for not only him, but for me too.
He may well be "just taking the mickey" but he has much more deep rooted issues i think which i think i have done my best to try to overcome.
But i think you are all right, that he will have to go, HOPEFULLY to the girl who had all of the success with him in the past. Failing that....to a very understanding home where he can be given all the time he needs. But i really will miss him.

So give it some time and i will probably be on the lookout for a 15hh ish not strong, non napping, horse to hack alone and with others, to do some schooling at home and the odd show/indoor showjumping/HT/xc....maybe fun ride lol (but i wont loose too much sleep over that one!!) that doesnt bronc, buck, rear, leap and plunge or rein snatch!! Doesnt have to be the next HOYS winner or be a BE eventer....just a straight forwards, calm (but not kick along ;-) ) nicely behaved horse! In the £2000 - £2500 price bracket.
I know what your all going to say....."hens teeth" lol!!
 
I, too, would forbid my child to ride this horse but having had one who could be similarly unpredictable, I wonder if any of his behaviour could be related to food allergies/sensitivities. Do you feed him anything at all? Treats/supplements/chaff/ carrots? Do passers-by feed him as the walk past the field? If the answer to this is yes, try to stop all feed of any kind, no matter how unlikely you think it is to be the culprit. If the feed is the problem then you will soon notice the difference in his behaviour.
 
Pearlsasinger said:
I, too, would forbid my child to ride this horse but having had one who could be similarly unpredictable, I wonder if any of his behaviour could be related to food allergies/sensitivities. Do you feed him anything at all? Treats/supplements/chaff/ carrots? Do passers-by feed him as the walk past the field? If the answer to this is yes, try to stop all feed of any kind, no matter how unlikely you think it is to be the culprit. If the feed is the problem then you will soon notice the difference in his behaviour.
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I dont think his behaviour is food related.
My previous horse did have food issues.....basically when i bought him the owners had half starved him to try and calm him down....he was a highly strung arab that actually calmed down funnily enough when he was given decent feed and he wasnt being starved!

But with paddy (the horse i have now) he doesnt get fed anything other than grass (he is on restricted grazing) and hay, and the odd carrot if he behaves himself!. He is a good doer and looks amazing on what he has now. He is perfect weight and has the most amazing shine to his coat and is the picture of health.
No one else feeds him anything....i made it clear that no one was to give him treats when i first had him as he was given too many by his last owner and could get a bit bolshy for them....so they were banned and introduced slowly for good behaviour. So unfortunately i dont think its to do with food. I wish it was as thats a pretty easy thing to correct with a bit of trial and error.
 
I was in a similar situation I had Molly two weeks and hacked out nicely, then we went out with a few friends and she thought we were going hunting and just bolted 5x times on the same ride, the last time I lost all my strength to do anything and went out the side door. My son's pony then decided to follow bolting riderless horse and my heart was in my mouth. All ended well and noone was hurt..... I never rode her again and she was sold the next week to a hunting home with no regrets, we were not compatable. I have two happy hackers that I have owned for about 7 yrs , we have nothing to prove and enjoy our rides because thats what its all about FUN!!! and enjoyment.
If you sell it will be hard but if you then find the right horse and start having fun you will be a happy bunny!!

Equally if you decide to keep and work on your horse it may prove to be a rewarding experience with a stronger bond too but it depends on which journey you want to take. Dx
 
Daisy2 said:
I was in a similar situation I had Molly two weeks and hacked out nicely, then we went out with a few friends and she thought we were going hunting and just bolted 5x times on the same ride, the last time I lost all my strength to do anything and went out the side door. My son's pony then decided to follow bolting riderless horse and my heart was in my mouth. All ended well and noone was hurt..... I never rode her again and she was sold the next week to a hunting home with no regrets, we were not compatable. I have two happy hackers that I have owned for about 7 yrs , we have nothing to prove and enjoy our rides because thats what its all about FUN!!! and enjoyment.
If you sell it will be hard but if you then find the right horse and start having fun you will be a happy bunny!!

Equally if you decide to keep and work on your horse it may prove to be a rewarding experience with a stronger bond too but it depends on which journey you want to take. Dx
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Oh my goodness gracious me....you must have been horrified seeing your sons pony bolt too.
I think this is what i have to tell myself.....i didnt set out to buy a project....i ended up with one due to a very dishonest seller. I got away lightly so really i should just quit whilst i am ahead and get a horse that i can enjoy, take to a show without the worry of the leaping/plunging/me getting hurt or worse still him hurting a child on the groud or something.

I am so lucky in the sense that i am at a yard where no one is opinionated/telly you what you should do/but will help you and offer their opinion if you ask for it.

My riding instructor said that she would support my decision if i kept him or if i sell him she will help me find another horse.
My friend who i have ridden with and who has helped me out alot (i.e accompanying me on hacks etc) since i got him and who saw his antics on the fun ride said how well i coped with what he threw at me that day, but if it was her, she would get a different horse as 4 hours of non stop plunging despite my best efforts to stop it and him injuring himself is not just a minor problem. She rides race horses for a living and sees enough highly strung etc horses and she thinks that the with the amount of work i have doen with him he is probably not going to get much better.

So the general concensus is to send him to someone who has more experience than me (i have ridden for 15 years and all sorts of horses so im not a novice, but dont have enough experience with really difficult horses) and more time.

Also i dont want my family etc constantly worrying.

I think i have made up my mind now that this is definately the right thing to do for paddy as well as for me.

Thanks to everyone for their support xx
 
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