First horse: Is it normal to feel a little overwhelmed?

Abi90

Abi90

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So, my first horse arrived on Friday. An absolutely gorgeous grey ISH Gelding called Forest (I asked about his grandparents the other day). And as much as I am overjoyed at his arrival I'm also a little bit scared.

I've been riding 21 years and worked on a stud yard for 8 but this is my first horse. He's very sweet and genuine.

But I just feel a little terrified and keep thinking "oh my, what have I done?" and I'm worried I'll do something wrong or hurt him in some way! I'm hoping this is a pretty normal feeling for first time horse owners!
 
Totally normal ,i think its a bit like bringing a baby home from hospital and panicking omg. I am planning on buying horse number 7 ,and am stressing about having to get to know a new one after 13 years with my old girl. It will settle down ,just take your time ,set a routine and enjoy getting to know them.....We need photos too.
 
Totally normal don't worry it goes away soon 😊 my boy turned up and I almost sent him back 3 days later cause I kept worrying/waiting for something to happen so didn't sleep for 3 days. Day 3 he went for a wander through the hedge into someone's back gardens and i got a panicked call telling me he had escaped (I'd thought he'd gone through the wire and was trying to eat Everyone when he had just got greedy and ate the bush and couldn't work out how to back up) and after that I was better but to be honest I wasn't 100% happy or confident with him until I moved him to a new place in Jan of this year some of the things he pulls now I just deal with without really thinking where as if they had happened back in Nov when I got him I would have lost it. I will have had him a year this November and I still have times where it feels like I'm ramming my head into a brick wall with him (at the moment we are having abit of the terrible 2s and is being a complete dick) buy I know the times he's an angel and sweet make up for the devil spawn days 😊
 
Totally. I fee it every time I get a new one. I had most of my herd on loan or sold when I got my stallion cause god forbid I have a mare and gelding on the property with one. Of course I needn't have worried I'm managing just fine, but I had myself really stressed out. I imagine if I got a big horse again I would feel the same sense of impending doom.
 
You will go through a number of stages ,until eventualy it becomes normal to you that your life now belongs to your horse and he need only give a gentle cough for you to start panicking. I on the otherhand having owned horses for half a century am immune ............unless he coughs twice ..............speed dials vet. You will get used to it ,honest.
 
Thanks everyone, I'm glad it's normal!

I'm currently stressing about the fact that I need to send his passport off to Ireland but his last owner let his jabs lapse a month ago so I need to restart but I need his passport so it can get stamped by the vet (as far as I know) and I'm worried he'll get influenza in the interim until his passport comes back!!
 
I would phone the vet and see if they will vaccinate before you change the passport over. I am sure they must have had to deal with that before.

Lovely horse btw.
 
With regard to passport the vets said they could stamp it retrospectively when passport returns.

So yesterday when I first took him in the school he was a bit wary and scared of everything. Today they school is no longer scary but there were poles out that another horse was using and he was spooking at them left right and centre. And jumping every time the other horse hit the poles. He wasn't doing anything scary, he shot off in canter a few times but came back quickly.

Now I know he's not normally a spooky horse or scared of poles as there was a lot going on when I tried him and he happily went over poles and logs etc.

I'm hoping all this spookiness this is because he's just moved and is a little unsettled and not used to me?
 
Congrats, it will get easier, he looks lovely with a kind face. Try to start to enjoy. He's sure to test your boundaries, but it won't matter whether you've had him a day, a week, month or year, it will still worry you because you care! So he's the lucky one, with a caring human mum, what every horse needs/wants!

Look forward to seeing how you get on, good luck ��
 
Totally normal :) I spent months planning and having a sensible/practical hit list when buying and yet the day he was delivered to the yard I felt like I'd been left a baby in a basket out of the blue and how on earth was I going to keep him alive?! It passed and then I watched someone who became a good friend arrive on our yard with her first horse too and realised it's just part of the process. He's lovely, hope you have a very good time together.
 
He looks lovely - congratulations!
I got my new horse a week and a half ago. The first few days she was quite unsettled and I kept worrying that I'd made a mistake.
Best thing I did was to have a lesson with our instructor , I felt so much better. Since then I've definitely been more chilled.
Good luck with your journey.
 
Dustygirl said:
He looks lovely - congratulations!
I got my new horse a week and a half ago. The first few days she was quite unsettled and I kept worrying that I'd made a mistake.
Best thing I did was to have a lesson with our instructor , I felt so much better. Since then I've definitely been more chilled.
Good luck with your journey.
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Thank you. He's very settled in his stable and coming in and out of the field and quite chilled out in general.

But he's being very dramatic in the school! Bolted twice at the sound of another horse's hoof hitting a pole and looked at the trotting poles like they were the devil himself. Tried just keeping him in walk and walking him past the poles which he did successfully twice and the trotted past them, even walked over one eventually but it was all very dramatic.

I know he isn't scared of poles as he's been showjumping in his last home and I took him over small cross country jumped when I tried him.

I'm hoping it's a combination of him settling in and possibly trying it on a bit!

Going to get a lesson on him ASAP!
 
Abi90 said:
So, my first horse arrived on Friday. An absolutely gorgeous grey ISH Gelding called Forest (I asked about his grandparents the other day). And as much as I am overjoyed at his arrival I'm also a little bit scared.

I've been riding 21 years and worked on a stud yard for 8 but this is my first horse. He's very sweet and genuine.

But I just feel a little terrified and keep thinking "oh my, what have I done?" and I'm worried I'll do something wrong or hurt him in some way! I'm hoping this is a pretty normal feeling for first time horse owners!
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I have owned my horse for 4 years and she is the first one I've owned - had a few on loan and got gifted one -but she was my first purchase and I still some days feel overwhelmed :p
 
Definitely normal! I'd had ponies as a child, and I had my horse on a sort of share/loan arrangement for about a year before I bought him, so I knew him fairly well, and I was still terrified when I finally bought him and brought him home. Even though he was familiar with me handling him, and I knew he's naturally a laid back sort of chap, he still behaved like an idiot for the first few weeks. Everything was scary, we had to go everywhere at 100mph, he stirred his bed up marching round and created a series of muddy tracks round the field. He was an absolute horror, and I had an awful chest infection, I was so weak I was using the wheelbarrow to transport feed buckets, and spent about a fortnight just being dragged from place to place on the end of his lead rope. I thought I'd made a terrible mistake, taken on something I couldn't deal with, ruined a lovely horse with my very presence. That was 9 months ago, and now we're having a lovely time together, we've built up a real bond, I love him to bits, and every day I see him in the field I think how lucky I am.

Get on, get out, and enjoy your new horse! He's gorgeous :)
 
I was very overwhelmed when I got my new horse. It wasn't exactly my first horse, I have another on loan for 5 years. However this was first one I had owned since I was a teenager. Despite being a horsey shopaholic and normally really decisive , I couldn't make any decisions. Choices like what stirrup leathers sent me in a spin.
I'm a confident rider and often get on other people's horse when they are playing up but my first time in the school I was like a beginner. Second day, I didn't really want to get on. Third day, a friend took me for a hack and that was the turning point and I started to get on with riding.
I have been having regular lessons and they have been a life line at times. She understands the horse and keeps it in perspective that he will have moments but he is a nice horse and is improving and that the plan is achievable. I would recommend anyone who gets a new horse budgets for weekly lessons. I also found camp good for my confidence.
I still have moments of eek but then try and keep it in perspective.
Good luck with your horse, trust your judgement, you will be fine.
 
I think I'm going to do some groundwork with him tomorrow.

I think he'll take confidence from having me on the ground with him and walking him past the scary door and over the scary pole!
 
He's lovely and yes you are not alone. I still worry about mine daily but at a reduced level and the remaining chunk is enjoyment and love of having him in my life xx
 
Definitely! Mine was a little terror in the first few weeks - bunny hopping in the stable, charging off in hand, jumping out of fields etc. I cried many times and thought I'd made a massive mistake. 6 months later and he's settled in brilliantly, I love him to bits and trust him so much. Everyone told me the first few weeks would be difficult and they we right! Chin up and keep doing what you're doing and it'll all click into place x
 
He's lovely! They are all so different to settle in, Mr B was very quiet and withdrawn at first but now his personality shines through but others we've had have been a bit wired at first. Just take your time, get to know him and most of all ENJOY him. I love greys!!!
 
When the ramp came down on the lorry delivering mine I burst into tears of sheer panic. He looked enormous ( actually he was enormous - I had forgotten how big though ) and appeared to be breathing fire when I thought I had bought a nice steady confidence giver. I cried every time I had to get on him for the first 5 days as I was so scared even though he was too fat and unfit to even canter ! He turned out to be a star in so many ways.
 
Thank you everyone for your kind and helpful replies.

Today he was even more settled in the school so we are getting there!

I've started to worry about him less too. After all we're on a livery yard so there are always people about if something happens!
 
Absolutely when my ISh horse arrived and they dropped the lorry ramp and I saw him standing there looking enormous I felt sick thought I'd made a big mistake but nearly 10 years later he is the best thing that has ever happened to me :-)
You'll be fine :-)
 
OMG the arrival of my first horse (over 40 years ago ) YO said as he marched down the ramp "There s a bit of blood !" meaning there's a horse of quality .You can guess my interpretation of what he meant and absolute panic!
 
I've just bought my first horse today so I can definitely empathise! Feeling worried already that he's too cold, not got enough hay.. Etc etc. I'm hoping like you have found the worrying will lessen over the next few weeks!
 
SecretAgentBilly said:
I've just bought my first horse today so I can definitely empathise! Feeling worried already that he's too cold, not got enough hay.. Etc etc. I'm hoping like you have found the worrying will lessen over the next few weeks!
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Few weeks! I am hoping the worry will lessen when I get to 70
 
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