First thread - Tough Decision!!!

[hanmay]

Hi there, this is my first thread on this forum so no kick offs please!
I have the very tough decision to make. I have a 13 year old welsh D x connemara mare who is currently up for sale due to my circumstances changing, but the interest people have had in her is slim to none. She's not a novice ride as she is strong and mareish, which is making her hard to sell already, even at £800! Over the last week she's been acting very out of character, i.e. dangerous. She's been going crazy in her stable, trying to jump out, rearing, kicking the walls, all for no reason (and I mean no reason, it just suddenly comes on). Even my partner and I couldn't hold her with a lead rope each. I've had the vet out to her 3 times this month and none can find any health issues with her. She's having bloods taken tomorrow and possibly may have to go in for scans. My dilemma now is that I was struggling to sell her in the first place, I'm now going to have a much harder time after this and because she's already quirky, her chances of finding a good forever home are dwindling away. I can't afford to keep her much longer and I certainly can't afford to keep paying these vet bills as I don't have insurance (I KNOW VERY VERY STUPID!!! I now have insurance for my gelding!!)
I'm now in the position where I'm thinking what option would be best for her. If I sell her as she is, there is no doubt in my mind that she would be passed from pillar to post, which isn't a fair life for any horse. I think the kindest thing for me to do would be to put her to sleep. I know some people will think this is selfish but I hate the thought of her going to a bad home. Other than moderate sweet itch, she's in good health (until I find out from her bloods if there are any issues) and it would be putting her to sleep before her time but I really think it would be the kindest option.
Does anyone have any experience with this? It's killing me the thought of ending her life but I can't sell on a dangerous horse and my time is running out.
P.s. sorry it's a long one!

 

[tallyho!]

Fistly welcome, and secondly - hugs. This is a toughie for sure but I think you have already made your mind up and come to a responsible decision. If she does sell and does something horrendous to new owner, could you live with it? You can't have her back by sounds of it so, unless you can get to bottom of behaviour be it diet related or physical issues, you may have to make the call.

 

[hanmay]

I couldn't trust her, nor live with myself if she ever harmed anyone! I just feel so guilty for ending her life before her time!

 

[Leo Walker]

Have her PTS and then rest easy knowing she will never suffer, because if you sell her on that is a very, very real possibility

 

[SusieT]

Is she turned out at all? exercised at all?

 

[hanmay]

turned out daily, have changed it to going out at night to see if that makes a difference. I'm not keeping her out 24/7 because of how quickly the grass is shooting up & it's so sugary!

 

[Rupertthebear]

This is a similar situation to how I ended up with my gelding. The previous owner didn't want him to end up in and out of auctions, wasnt happy selling him as he can be quite a handful/dangerous, and being 10 is a little too old for those wanting a fresh project - so I took him home because he was free there was strong chance he may have been PTS. I am very lucky we have clicked and he is great (most of the time) but it has been a hard slog with plenty of bad days.

So, there will be hope somewhere with someone, its just finding it!

 

[hanmay]

My only problem is that I'm getting pushed for time, I'm spending more and more money on vets bills to find out why she keeps kicking off randomly in her stable and I can't afford to keep going any more. It's getting that bad I can't even get a dealer interested in her which I know is a horrible way of life for her anyway!

 

[Rupertthebear]

My only problem is that I'm getting pushed for time, I'm spending more and more money on vets bills to find out why she keeps kicking off randomly in her stable and I can't afford to keep going any more. It's getting that bad I can't even get a dealer interested in her which I know is a horrible way of life for her anyway!

No one likes to see anything put to sleep if there is chance I know, but I understand that if you let her go she could end up anywhere which is sad. Difficult also that you don't have time on your side putting pressure on the situation. Could she go somewhere for 24/7 turnout in the meantime with other horses over the summer, just to give you more time to decide. Could she be sold as a companion?

 

[SusieT]

if she doesn tlike her stable leave her out 24/7...

 

[Red-1]

Sending virtual (((hugs))) and the observation that whatever you decide will be the right thing.

 

[hanmay]

Susie!T - I can't leave her out 24/7 as the grass is shooting up & so sugary, she will end up colicing. She doesn't dislike her stable, she's never had any issues in her stable and this has all sudden started happening.

Rupertthebear - I can't sell her as she is at the minute because I couldn't sleep at night knowing someone could easily get seriously injured by her. I won't be in the position once she goes to have her back. I've had hardly any interest in her as she is at £800 so I think her chances of going to a genuine home are very slim.

She had the vet out earlier today and the vet couldn't find anything wrong with her at all. She took bloods and I will get the results tomorrow, even she found it so bizarre what was happening. I'm going to wait to see what the bloods show and I've discussed with the vet that the end of June will be the cut off point if we've not got any answers by then.

 

[SusieT]

if she's suddenly started doing it likely theres something e.g rats, flappy something nearby, smell that's set her off
If she truely wont stop send her to a pro for a couple of weeks as often the rider /andler contributes to thes eissues
also 800 is quite a lot for a 13 yr old as described, loan as a project?

 

[millikins]

This is a similar situation to how I ended up with my gelding. The previous owner didn't want him to end up in and out of auctions, wasnt happy selling him as he can be quite a handful/dangerous, and being 10 is a little too old for those wanting a fresh project - so I took him home because he was free there was strong chance he may have been PTS. I am very lucky we have clicked and he is great (most of the time) but it has been a hard slog with plenty of bad days.

So, there will be hope somewhere with someone, its just finding it!

This isn't very helpful for someone who is running out of time and money with a difficult horse and feels guilty already

PTS is a responsible idea in your situation and you shouldn't beat yourself up about it. But, as another poster suggests, check if there is something in the stable causing this behaviour, wasps' nest maybe? Until they go drowsy in late summer, most wasps go completely unnoticed by humans.

 

[Rupertthebear]

This isn't very helpful for someone who is running out of time and money with a difficult horse and feels guilty already

I know millikins :-( not helpful

 

[honetpot]

You say the grass is too surgery and she will colic, has this actually happened? There is a chance that a if she is stressed in the stable she will colic anyway.
I would mow a strip of grass, I do it with a lawn mover with a grass box and make her an outdoor box with electric fencing so she can see another pony.
I have owned some of my ponies for 25 years and they change, just like us. They make new friends that they become really attached to, decide the food that you have always given them is no longer OK, and decide they can no longer live in after living most of their life in a stable.
If you really think there is no obvious solution and you are worried for her in the long term PTS. I have never regretted having any of mine PTS

 

[hanmay]

Millikins - there was a rat issue a few weeks ago but traps were set out and disposed of. She's been in 4 different stables now, 2 different barns and she still continues to kick off.

Honetpot - she had 'spasmodic colic' on the 12th May, since then she's been in at night and out in the day. Never had any issues up until this past week/10 days. She wasn't out 24/7 last year at all on our old yard so it's not like I've taken her out of a usual routine.

She's having her ovaries scanned on Monday for cysts/tumors/etc. so I'll hopefully have an answer then. Unfortunately if there are no issues with her ovaries and it's all just behavioral, I think I'll have to have her PTS as I can't risk her going to another home as she is because she's too dangerous. I'm not giving her away for free as someone horrible could end up having her and I don't even want to think about that.

 

[Chinchilla]

Oh dear, I'm afraid I can't be much help in the way of advice but ****HUGS*** this must be awful for everyone involved. What is your mare doing in terms of dangerous behaviour if I may ask? You said she is rearing and kicking the walls then said you and your husband couldn't hold her so it's she bolting or -?