Fog stops Fun at Askham Bryan Horse Trials

Fun Times

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I don't normally post competition reports as I am terribly insecure and assumed no one would be interested in what myself and the Big Horse were upto. Also I have fat thumbs which makes typing on my phone tiresome. However after a recent thread about "where have all the competition reports gone" (I paraphrase) I determined to overcome my phobia and post a report on us doing BE 90 at Askham Bryan, our final run of the season. Panic and crisis at 6.00am when I couldn't see the Big Horse in the field due to fog and darkness. Steeled self to call police (this is surely cause to make a 999 emergency call and not that other number for calls when you have lost your house keys/have squeezed a spot, isnt it???) to report missing Big Horse. Tried to remember for the purposes of police description exactly which legs are white. Further panic as cannot remember leg colour. Argh, not only have I misplaced the Big Horse but I have forgotten what he looks like. Panic replaced with anger as Big Horse emerges from under the trees, laughing. One hour and five excited poos later (Big Horse, not me) and we are enroute. In the fog. OH had specifically asked me last night if I knew how to put fog lights on in the truck and I gave him my finest "what kind of numpty do you take me for" speech to which he had the good grace to apologise for his patronising ways.
Fast forward ten hours to panic and crisis. No idea how to put fog lights on. Randomly press all buttons twice....oh look, thats how you wash the windscreen, how interesting. Give my yardowner's hubby a cheery parp of the horn as we leave (accidental parping, was still looking for fog lights).
Arrive safely. Warm up like a hippo on illegal substance (Big Horse, not me). Have a mild panic and crisis about fact Big Horse seems to want to plough forward into every downwards transition. Try to correct by patting gently on neck and begging him to please stop it. Plan does not succeed. Abort niceness plan and give Big Horse a kick. Hippo shoots forward. Panic and crisis.
We produced a fairly nice test which scored high twenties. Although I suspect the judge could only see the upper half of it as the fog was so bad.
On to the sj and despite whacking every pole we had a lucky clear. I left the nail varnish of shame (I.e the paint off the poles) on his feet to encourage him to be more careful.
On to the xc. Now this is what Big Horse comes for. He tolerates dressage. He finds sj a bit meh. But he does them because he knows it leads to his favourite thing...belting wildly across a field with me hanging on to his ears pleading with him to please be careful. After 1.5 hours delay waiting for the fog to lift, the organisers made the decision to abandon the xc phase. Now I personally think this was the right choice in the interests of safety. Big Horse however reached in to the back of the truck to find my longest dressage whip and went in search of the organisers, wearing his grimmest expression.
And thus endeth our 2014 season. We were lying second when we left (having wrestled the whip off Big Horse and used it to prod him back to the truck). You know how it is, we have all been there and disappointing though it was to have the weather ruin our season finale I took it on the chin like a mature adult. Meanwhile, from the back of the truck comes the wails of a tantrumming Big Horse "dont take me home, I want to go xc. I can see the fences perfectly well. Wahhh!!!!"
 

ahml100

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What a shame about the cancellation but well done in the other two phases! I hope you post more often, like you I properly started this season and love reading about other peoples days :) something tells me if they cancelled xc my horse would do the same!!
 

EmmaB

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Haha v funny report, please do more! Shame you didn't get to do the best bit though, hope big horse doesn't hold this as a grudge against you!
 

Fun Times

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Thank you everyone for your encouragement, will defo do more reports in future. As for Big Horse not holding a grudge, I have had to tell him repeatedly that this whole catastrophe (his words - he is very dramatic, I blame his father) is not grounds to call the rspca. That said, we are privileged enough to have qualified for the grassroots champs at badminton next year and if we don't get to run there we will both be tantrumming like spoilt bairns.
 
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We had a similar experience, except for our clinging round the ears extends to showjumping and occasionally dressage too! After a civilised dressage and almost civilised sj Horse was disgruntled to be going home just as the 100 xc was starting ("hellooooooo, you seem to have forgotten the vital part of the event, helloooo, hellooooo, horse in distress here!") and is now in a foul mood slamming around the field not speaking to anybody. It was rather foggy though...

Congratulations on your dressage and sj, guess there's always another day!
 
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Steorra

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Bad luck with the weather but I've been giggling over your report. Your writing is really funny! Any chance of some dressage or sj reports over the winter, or are you having some down-time until next season?
 

Orangehorse

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Nice report and well done with the DR and SJ.

Feeble organisers. They obviously weren't at Batsford XXXXXX years ago, on the side of a Cotswold hill where the competitors jumped over a stone wall into fog, and they were then guided by pony riders shouting "follow me" and belting across the field to the next fence, which was, I think probably the last fence. The ponies must have been whacked by the end of the afternoon, but the competition finished OK and I don't recall anyone falling off.
 

mil1212

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Great report! (well, apart from the fog) Love the nail varnish of shame, we very regularly sport a different shade on each hoof, very vogue! I was at Weston Park today and found the fog so disorientating, and they had to hold the course a few times before the fence judges could see the horses!
 

Vodkagirly

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Love the report, very funny. Shame about the fog, must of been very frustrating. No waiting for the eventing season to restart for more reports we need dressage/sj reports for the winter please.
 

Vickijay

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You should definitely write more reports. That was ace! Well done in your 2nd place, what a shame the fog turned it into combined training!
 

hobo

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Super report shame about XC , I used to live near AB and one winter the fog lasted a week so can imagine what it was like. Will expect reports next year from you plus you will have to do some winter events to keep us entertained.
 

chestnut cob

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Brilliant report, best one I've read in ages! Please do more reports in future! :D

Such a shame about the XC, my horse would sympathise completely with Big Horse's disappointment. Well done on the other two phases. Nail varnish of shame, love it!
 
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