Follow on from the 'You've got a horse, you're loaded' post

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Flicker

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What's the most insulting thing anyone's ever said to you regarding the amount of money you spend on your horse?

My OH's mother told us that I should 'get rid' of my horse so that we could spend the money on a bigger mortgage for a 'better house'. Fortunately OH's response to her was short, sharp and cannot be repeated on a public forum...
 
My Mother once said 'what is the point of keeping a horse you can't ride, your wasting your money?' when our old mare was retired due to injury. I was a bit mad, and explained to her that I felt the same way about said horse as she did about her cat, and that she was now a large pet and she would be loved and looked after until the end of her days. I think she just wanted to start an argument really. :rolleyes:
 
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My OH is always telling me what we COULD afford if I "got rid" of the horses. If I say anything like "oh, I wish I could go on holiday" - the reply is always "well you could if you didnt have horses". Wow, helpful. Recently, because I now have a horse worth a decent (IMO) amount of money he now says "well when you sell the horse, with the money we can buy...". Erm no. I made the horse gain value by riding it and spending money competing it over several years, he did nothing to help therefore I earned it! If I sold, I'd spend it on what I chose! It doesn't matter that he constantly bails me out money-wise coz I can't afford to pay the bills because my horse needs fed... lol. Us horsey people are so unreasonable!
 
My brother regularly mutters something about 'spending all the money on those ******* horses' as we leave the horse to turn out/bring in. And he nearly had a frigging hissy fit when he read the livery bill.

He's disgusted that my parent's are spending all his inheritance I think ;)

Although I do feel a >tiny< bit sorry for him as he is the only non horsey one out of us all, but hey, what can you do!?:)
 
I'm lucky in that I live on my own so have no-one to moan about the money I spend on the ponies. Also, though my Mum is not horsey and really doesn't understand why I choose to spend all my money on them, she realises that it is my choice and doesn't lecture me on it! Also they look after my savings so I don't spend it all and where quite happy to send over £600 for a vets bill!
 
Not money related, but 4 days (yes. FOUR DAYS) after my beloved Dylan - who I'd had for more than seven years and was my best friend - was put down, someone at work told me I "needed to put my loss into perspective".

I nearly ******* smacked her.
 
dibbin said:
Not money related, but 4 days (yes. FOUR DAYS) after my beloved Dylan - who I'd had for more than seven years and was my best friend - was put down, someone at work told me I "needed to put my loss into perspective".

I nearly ******* smacked her.
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Nice...

I am lucky at work, my manager is animal-mad and one of our senior directors took a week off work when his dog died - ahhhh.

I am extremely fortunate with my OH - he's not horsey but adores my lad and recognises that I am frequently a much nicer person when I get home after spending a few hours up at the yard, so shares in the benefits LOL. His parents think I'm frittering his money away though - what they don't appreciate is that we have very separate financial lives and the only one who incurs financial hardship from horse ownership is me!! Example - a recent trip to the Lake District saw me buying a couple of slabs of mint cake and OH buying £500 worth of gear in the Joules shop in about half an hour. That's just over 2 months' livery for me!!
 
Flicker said:
Nice...

I am lucky at work, my manager is animal-mad and one of our senior directors took a week off work when his dog died - ahhhh.

I am extremely fortunate with my OH - he's not horsey but adores my lad and recognises that I am frequently a much nicer person when I get home after spending a few hours up at the yard, so shares in the benefits LOL. His parents think I'm frittering his money away though - what they don't appreciate is that we have very separate financial lives and the only one who incurs financial hardship from horse ownership is me!! Example - a recent trip to the Lake District saw me buying a couple of slabs of mint cake and OH buying £500 worth of gear in the Joules shop in about half an hour. That's just over 2 months' livery for me!!
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My (non-horsey) OH is fab, when he found out Dylan had been pts he abandoned his dinner and drove from Edinburgh to Ayrshire (75 miles) to spend the night with me.

Score on the Joules stuff :p I bought mine a Joules polo shirt, he loves it lol. And he's agreed to try riding at some point.

I tended to get a bit of the "you've got a horse, you must have loads of money" thing at uni ... no, I'm an impoverished student like the rest of you, I just got less lie-ins!
 
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dibbin said:
Not money related, but 4 days (yes. FOUR DAYS) after my beloved Dylan - who I'd had for more than seven years and was my best friend - was put down, someone at work told me I "needed to put my loss into perspective".

I nearly ******* smacked her.
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I don't know how you didn't! I very very very rarely lose my temper but I know full well that when I do, it's normally something to do with the horses. Never get between me and my boys :p
 
dibbin said:
Not money related, but 4 days (yes. FOUR DAYS) after my beloved Dylan - who I'd had for more than seven years and was my best friend - was put down, someone at work told me I "needed to put my loss into perspective".

I nearly ******* smacked her.
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Similar - I was in a training meeting at work when I found out my dog was critically ill with meningitis. I took a call from my husband and started to pack my things and the trainer said he sympothised but could I leave personal calls to coffee time.

I went red with anger - thankfully my colleagues who know me very well stepped in, helped me pack my things and told the trainer to sod off!
 
my colleagues gave frequently made comments about how wealthy I must be - particulalry when i had more than 1 horse - they have shut up a bit since i pointed out that i havn't had any sort of holiday for 8 yrs, never, ever go out for drinks, meals etc [ including work dos], shop in Aldi & the local market & have a 25 yr old cooker & a 15 yr old microwave:D
it does occasionally annoy me that its seen as fine for colleagues to spend £30/40 on a night out but my v basic horse costs are up for debate & comment
 
smiffyimp said:
Similar - I was in a training meeting at work when I found out my dog was critically ill with meningitis. I took a call from my husband and started to pack my things and the trainer said he sympothised but could I leave personal calls to coffee time.

I went red with anger - thankfully my colleagues who know me very well stepped in, helped me pack my things and told the trainer to sod off!
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Hehe - my friend's mare got colic and got cast in her stable, we got her back up, put a rug on, built up her bankings and called my friend at work. Her manager told her he'd rather she stayed at work ... friend burst into tears and sobbed "if this was my child, you'd let me leave!" Boss (like all men, terrified of crying women) let her come home to her baby :p
 
dibbin said:
Hehe - my friend's mare got colic and got cast in her stable, we got her back up, put a rug on, built up her bankings and called my friend at work. Her manager told her he'd rather she stayed at work ... friend burst into tears and sobbed "if this was my child, you'd let me leave!" Boss (like all men, terrified of crying women) let her come home to her baby :p
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HEHE tears do work well. I wasnt about to cry, I was about to lose my Yorkshire temper with him though. I did scare him! Which to this day I am very proud of. AND 3 years later, my puppy is well and alive (went to hell and back but we got there).
 
Sorry if this seems harsh, but I would not dream of mentioning my pets or their injuries to my manager or most of my colleagues, even when things are not going well. I think it can be pretty unprofessional let one's pets impact on work.

Also, it makes sense to me to pay a yard manager or professional groom to assist with the horse in the event of emergency while I am at work. I also prefer paying for part livery so that I can work late, travel on short notice etc whenever required.

If you are lucky enough to have a pet-loving manager and team, that is great. But lots of people are not into pets. Some work places are not overly keen on people staying home with sick kids, so obviously may be rather unimpressed about horse emergencies. So why potentially make a really bad impression?
 
_CJ_ said:
Sorry if this seems harsh, but I would not dream of mentioning my pets or their injuries to my manager or most of my colleagues, even when things are not going well. I think it can be pretty unprofessional let one's pets impact on work.
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The thing is, I wasn't going on about it at all ... I hadn't even brought it up because I didn't fancy bursting into tears at work! I'd phoned work the day after he was PTS, just so that everyone would know and I wouldn't have to tell them all about it when I went in on the Saturday. The comment from my colleague was TOTALLY out of the blue, I was so shocked I didn't even say anything back.
 
My next door neighbours mum and dad asked me "but why get a horse" when I bought my mare. "they are very expensive" - I actually did not bother answering because it would have been down the lines of "well if you and your family spent less on bloody champagne then you could have a polo team!!"
 
So _CJ_ if your horse of a lifetime was about to be pts because he had, I don't know - impaction colic or a twisted gut, you would wait til your break, call your yard and say "you deal with it I am working"? Really? Hell I'd quit my job if I had to, to get to the yard for either of mine! Luckily I think my managers would understand if I really had to go.
 
_CJ_ said:
Sorry if this seems harsh, but I would not dream of mentioning my pets or their injuries to my manager or most of my colleagues, even when things are not going well. I think it can be pretty unprofessional let one's pets impact on work.

Also, it makes sense to me to pay a yard manager or professional groom to assist with the horse in the event of emergency while I am at work. I also prefer paying for part livery so that I can work late, travel on short notice etc whenever required.

If you are lucky enough to have a pet-loving manager and team, that is great. But lots of people are not into pets. Some work places are not overly keen on people staying home with sick kids, so obviously may be rather unimpressed about horse emergencies. So why potentially make a really bad impression?
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I hear what you're saying, and it would have to be an emergency but nor do I think it is up to somebody else to make potentially serious decisions on my behalf, in the case of my dog she had an emergency referral with an immediate payment of 2.5k (over the 3 years it added up to a lot more) - how could somebody else make that decision for me? I am lucky in that my managers know how much I love my animals and would never have a problem with me dealing with them in an emergency, but at the same token as an owner we have a responsibilty to the animals in these situation. If you are happy for somebody to deal with yours - thats great and your choice. I wouldnt be and my boss would have to deal with it. PS - non of my managers have animals, but they respect me and the fact that I do.
 
_CJ_ said:
Sorry if this seems harsh, but I would not dream of mentioning my pets or their injuries to my manager or most of my colleagues, even when things are not going well. I think it can be pretty unprofessional let one's pets impact on work.

Also, it makes sense to me to pay a yard manager or professional groom to assist with the horse in the event of emergency while I am at work. I also prefer paying for part livery so that I can work late, travel on short notice etc whenever required.

If you are lucky enough to have a pet-loving manager and team, that is great. But lots of people are not into pets. Some work places are not overly keen on people staying home with sick kids, so obviously may be rather unimpressed about horse emergencies. So why potentially make a really bad impression?
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Clearly you are a person that has animals and not an 'animal person' BIG difference, what exactly do you do?
 
No Sanolly, my yard manager is professional and hence would ensure the horse got the veterinary attention it needed straight away. As it happens, my horse of a lifetime had a serious injury while I was far far away with work, which was dealt with appropriately and immediately by the yard owner who ensured she was seen by a vet straight away and then taken to a top equine vet center. I got the phone call from the yard manager straight away however since it was an emergency the yard manager contacted the vet first.

If you can afford to lose your job that is fine for you, but I need it to support myself, my horse, and the enormous vet bill. Doesn't mean I love my horse any less or that I wasn't devastated. It was hard for me to be there, but it made no difference whatsover for my horse - she was heavily sedated and I'm not an equine surgeon.
 
stroppy said:
Clearly you are a person that has animals and not an 'animal person' BIG difference, what exactly do you do?
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I think that is a pretty rude and snap judgment. Just because I take my job seriously and work in an environment where one is expected to put WORK (as opposed to family, pets, etc etc) first, does not make me "not an animal person"!?

I was just trying to point out that bringing up pet emergencies at work, or being sentimental about pets, could be seen as unprofessional by managers and colleagues who neither know nor care about horses.

I was absolutely gutted when my horse was injured, went through rehab, just made it through but I won't get to ride her. The past year has been horrible! But I don't think my manager or colleagues are interested in that, so I choose to keep it to myself.

Just because I don't show, or talk to my manager and colleagues about my feelings and problems, does not mean that I love my horse any less, or that I am not an "animal person".
 
I can 'get' the idea that if one of mine had a cut I would ask my YO to deal with it, but a serious and potentially life threatening injury/illness, I would have to be there in person to speak to the vet, or say good bye. I don't earn good money (minimum wage) and I couldn't really afford to lose my job, however my ponies/dog are everything to me and I know that if I stayed at work I would be an emotional mess and no use to anyone.
 
When my mare was PTS I did get quite a few "what a relief that must be, you will have more money" :o Not a clue have they?

I manage 10 people and frankly if someone needs to be cut some slack for whatever reason (cat, dog, child, possibly husband :D) then so be it. It is not like we are manning the Hadron Collider :D
 
As it happened, I was too far away to get there soon anyway (working abroad) so I had no choice in the matter. If anything happened now I would tell work I had a personal issue and needed to take some time off, and hope they agreed to let me use up some holiday so I could go straight to see mine, but I would not discuss my horse.

My manager does not seem to have any interests outside work, expects everyone to do lots of overtime, seems to put work before family etc so I strongly suspect would not be a good idea to go into details about my horse. I'd have been more comfortable confiding in some of my past managers who were more family and work-balance focused :-)

Also, if I started crying I think my manager would feel extremely uncomfortable, which was another good reason for not bringing up the horse situation.
 
So far I've been incredibly lucky. No snide comments that I remember.

When I had to have Tiggy put to sleep I was a wreck. So much crying. My client at the time was incredibly understanding and wonderful. I managed not to cry most of the time in the offices, but did have to nip to the ladies on the odd occassion. I did a lot of driving at the time, so had time alone to just be sad.
 
My now ex and i had gone out for lunch with his parents and his mum started to say something about the cost of my horses keep, He did reply very quickly with "no ..... pays for them herself" too blinking right he had to be quick saying that i had just bailed him out of a £5k bank loan. and the funny part is they thought i was spending all his money. He had no money for me to spend only debts which i had to pay off
 
Maybe not so much insulting as a tad stupid...I had my little 6 month old gelded a week ago. OH couldn't grasp the concept of why I had it done as 'it's expensive'. Firstly it was me who paid for it and secondly he is one of 8 ponies, 6 of whom are mares/fillies so I'm kinda thinking it was a necessary expense :o
 
TelH said:
Maybe not so much insulting as a tad stupid...I had my little 6 month old gelded a week ago. OH couldn't grasp the concept of why I had it done as 'it's expensive'. Firstly it was me who paid for it and secondly he is one of 8 ponies, 6 of whom are mares/fillies so I'm kinda thinking it was a necessary expense :o
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LOL! My non-horsey OH - although he does understand how much horses mean to me etc etc - was continually astonished how much Dylan cost to run :p
 
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