Following on from poor horse owner...........

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matthew

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Was reading with interest GT'S post and it got me wondering the following.
If you are married / living with unhorsey partner how do you agree between you that you can afford your horse? ie: do you feel guilty that hubby has to go without for your hobby?
And do you all pay for your horses purely from your own wage or if you are married and have joint accounts- how does that work?

I hope i have made sense. Basically i dont think i could afford a horse at the moment- but i am wondering if you pay for you horse yourself does your o/h pay more money towards morgage, bills etc to help you out?
I know every situation is different but i would just be really worried about my o/h suffering for my hobby- it would be so much easier if he was horsey too!
 
TBH it's not something that would ever occur to me to worry about. I had my horse long before OH. They also have an expensive hobby - sailing - which I certainly wouldn't expect to be consulted on either.
 
I pay for most things for my horse but hubby often treats me to extras. He absolutely encourages me because he knows I'll always be in a good mood when I've been to the yard!! He also jetskis and kite surfs so we both have time consuming hobbies. We don't struggle financially and enjoy the time together more if we've had our own space!
 
Hmm- yeah i see what you are saying but my o/h's thing is his car- but it doesnt reallycost a great deal and i would worry that if i was paying for a horse then i wouldnt be able to put money towards holidays and meals etc!
If i already had a horse when i met him that would be different as he would have to take me as i am!
I think in a few years we could discuss it seriously- he is really supportive though- he came riding with me last weekend (he is terrified of horses) and really enjoyed it!
 
I have to be honest, if I were in your position I would be thinking 'Can we afford for ME to have a horse?' Rightly or wrongly.

Marriage is a partnership. About doing things that make both of you happy. If you choose to take up an expensive hobby or any hobby really I would expect OH to supprt you as much as you would support him if the foot was on the other foot.
 
Before I had my daughter and was working full-time I paid all the costs of my horse myself. We had a joint household account and we both had individual personal accounts - we paid a set amount into the joint account every month which covered the mortgage, bills etc, so any money left in our personal accounts was ours to spend as we wished.

The situation is more blurred now as OH is self-employed and I work for him. So although I am spending 'his' money on the horses, I've actually helped earn the money in the first place!
 
We have always put all our money in a central pot but now I earn lots less than my husband I feel guilty that so much of our money goes on Domino. He says its OK and he will let me know if it becomes a problem. He is great
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Cassandra
 
I pay for all my horses needs, my OH has yet to meet my horse (supposed to see her this W/E - this is not as bad as it sounds). We don't argue over the costs as that would likened to arguing over her welfare which, is never a discussion point.

As we've only owned her for just over a year it has been expensive with new tack, rugs & moving etc however; the costs are tapering off now
 
So it seems most people pay for it out of there own money only!
If you knew my o/h you would know why i get worried! he is so laid back he is almost laid down most of the time! if i asked him if he minded he would say no! but he might be a bit miffed deep down!
It isnt really just about money though- if i owned a horse i would be out competing every weekend so o/h would either have to come with me or spend the weekend apart!
He is a teacher so is on a different planet uring the week!
I think for me- a share in a horse would be ideal! rather than having to commit 100%.
 
Mines easy, I pay for the horses (work full time) and OH pays the Mortgage and the bills. He knows his place, he, he! No seriously he knows how much enjoyment I get from the horses so he doesn’t really mind. Plus it helps that I don’t always tell him how much I’m spending, I know he spends more on his hobbies (shooting, ducks, pigs) then he tells me sometimes. Especially when I find an Ostrich egg incubator in the garage.
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I'll be paying for Chex once I leave uni in a few months (parents pay just now), but I'm also hoping to get a house with OH. I was thinking about how the horse would fit into it all, not really sure! I think maybe join the money to pay any bills, then have our seperate money for whatever we want.
 
I've just recently bought a horse and thoroughly discussed it with my husband beforehand. He knows how happy riding and just being around my horse makes me and is also well aware of the time/expense involved.

I made a spreadsheet "budget" to determine the average monthly cost for stuff like livery, shoes, food, insurance, random vet costs and weighed up whether we could afford it without having to go without too much other things. He was happy for me to go for it as long as it wasn't affecting our finances any more than I'd predicted and if circumstances change for the worse, the horse as a "luxury" and one of our biggest "lifestyle" outgoings would be the first to be reconsidered and possibly sold/loaned out.

This is fair enough as if I wasn't able to afford to keep her and keep her well, I'd rather someone else could. Especially regarding welfare such as vet costs.

We have joint accounts. My husband does a lot of karate and goes to the gym, which although not as expensive as the horse, keeps him busy and he doesn't feel hard done by.

We give ourselves an "allowance" on a weekly basis which makes sure we don't firtter money away needlessly and I pay for any lessons out of this. This money also has to pay for lunches at work, nights out etc, so it means I have to choose what I want and go without alcohol etc, but I really don't mind and would rather ride anyway!

Apologies for the long-winded ramble! I guess at the end of the day, as long as you're always happy to discuss and accept some compromise in some areas, it's do-able.
 
lol, the fact that my OH works nights so that we can keep a pony (so he's here in the day to look after youngest child) speaks for itself.
but then he knows how much of a family affair it is, how much the kids love the ponio, and doesnt mind.
He gets nights out with mates etc, and as the pony was my idea (and my baby lol) i don't.
 
My Oh took me on with my horse years ago. We have a set amount we put into joint account and then we each pay for our own hobbies (he races cars) works perfect for us
 
I pay for the Donkey out of my money, however hubby is known to sneak up to local store and buy her treats, feed and carrots without being asked!! He did also buy me my trailer - but this is with the view that we can go off places with the Donkey and his mountain bike and ride together!!

His other hobby is just as expensive, but as he points out less time consuming as he puts it away in the hanger until he wants to play again - flying!!!!!!!!!!!
 
We have a joint account which both wages go in to and everything goes out of. I work part time as we have a 3 year old daughter and my hubby has a fairly well paid job (he earns 3x my wages) but we share everything and I just pay for my horse out of our joint account.
I earn enough to pay for my horse and contribute towards the bills etc.
Anyway he bought Axey for me, so he can't really compain can he?
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I owned horses before I met my hubby. However, hee is very supportive and has never once complained I have 3 on full livery !!! I pay for them out of my own wages but he does contribute slightly more towards the mortgage to cover my shortfall ! He's a star !
 
we have one joint acc and everything goes from there - he never grumbles about how much they cost or that i had one horse when I met him and now have 4... in fact he encourages it and has now got the bug himself. He does earn considerably more than me though so if we were to work it out he prob pays for 2/3 of the horses...

He is into retro mountain bikes and I try to take part as much as i can with that too.
 
Ahhh that is so sweet! that is what i would like with mat- i would love for us both to be able to get out in the countryside together- he might prefer being on a bike to being on a horse!
 
My OH is totally unhorsey. He is self employed and works all hours, I therefore only can work part time around the children (we have no nearby family to help out). We have separate bank accounts and I do about three part time jobs to pay for the horses and the dogs. He never moans about the horses (I've always had them anyway) but we have nothing in common so horses good for me but not good for a relationship!
 
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We split all the household bills between us, then do as we please with what is left, whether that is saving, spending..whatever..horses in my case

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Works exactly the same in my house
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I have a joint account with the OH, but only household things and food comes out of that account, we both equally put in a set amount each month. I dont have a horse but I equate it to his car.... I wouldnt be happy paying more into a joint account so he can drive his BMW, as im sure he wouldnt be happy supporting my horse if I had one.
 
She gets nervous around them and in fairness up until recently shes been kept an hours drive away so it's a long way to go to watch me run round in circles however, I'll have her picking hoofs out and cleaning tack before you know it.
 
OH wasn't horsey when I met him but it didn't take me long to 'change' that
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I had my old mare so OH would ride Jazz until last year when my girl was PTS and we moved. So now Jazz is all mine
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and OH has emotional attachment and pays the bills
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Seriously though he has always been fantastic about all the animals and although he enjoys his sailing and classic bikes we are both commited to putting their needs first
I'm a lucky woman, I appreciate him
 
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