Frustrated/sad all of my making

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Limbo1

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Not sure why I am posting - probably as my OH is sick of me talking about it!

So I have posted a couple of times about the Mare I have `on loan'. She is an expolo pony who I got on perminat loan/with potential ownership sign over. So she arrived late Nov, by early Dec I realized she was slightly lame in front - advised owner. Gave her a few weeks to see if any improvement and xmas was very busy. So in the new year she was no different so as I was getting her teeth done I got the vet to take a look. She said prob DJD in lower joint, to see how she goes over next few weeks etc. The only way to get a definitive diagnosis would be xrays. I put her on turmeric and oil etc. So she has been ok, some days seems fine but others not so. The other day I took her out and I could really feel it and she was not keen to trot.

So I have decided she is not up to what I want her for. After stressing for a day or two I wrote a message to her owner saying this. All I got back was he is fine with me finding a companion home for her! I don't mind trying for a bit.

So I advertised her in the same facebook group she came from tagging him. A few people posted what a nice horse she is and had I tried turmeric? Owner posted a slightly sarky comment about turmeric not being a quick fix it takes months to work. She was on turmeric at previous home so only had 3-4 weeks off it! I was very close to replying to this effect but did not as it is a open forum.

SO I am sad that the lovely horse who is perfect for me is not sound enough to ride. I am frustrated as I seem to be left holding the baby! And most sorry for the lovely horse with an uncertain future. And before you ask no there is no loan agreement!
 
Can you give them notice? ie further to our conversation, just to let you know that I cannot continue to care for x and after xyz date and I will be bringing her back to your yard?
 
If I knew where they lived! I took her from a previous loanee. As I said I don't mind helping for a few weeks to rehome her I was expecting hi to come back with thanks for letting me know can you keep her till I find alternative - that would have been fine but I feel a bit like he thinks it is my fault - lots of she was never lame with us comments. This is what I mean when I know I have been daft in accepting a horse on a loose arrangement.
 
PonyclubmumZ said:
Can you give them notice? ie further to our conversation, just to let you know that I cannot continue to care for x and after xyz date and I will be bringing her back to your yard?
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I would suggest this too.

I remember a previous thread about this mare and although I'm sorry to hear that things haven't worked out, I'm glad you've come to a decision.

I know you say you don't mind helping rehome her but it sounds like this is already proving to be (understandably) emotionally draining for you, so I agree with the above post and would encourage you to return her and move on.
 
Limbo1 said:
If I knew where they lived! I took her from a previous loanee. As I said I don't mind helping for a few weeks to rehome her I was expecting hi to come back with thanks for letting me know can you keep her till I find alternative - that would have been fine but I feel a bit like he thinks it is my fault - lots of she was never lame with us comments. This is what I mean when I know I have been daft in accepting a horse on a loose arrangement.
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In that case just be more forthright with the owner. Explain that you need to return her and ask where to ��
 
If the owners are not prepared to take the horse back, and it is not fit for purpose, or can be found a companion home, then I would give the owners a set time period to take the poor horse back or euthanize.

Tbh I think pts would be the obvious solution - there are too many unwanted horses out there and at least the creature would have a guaranteed future.

If you have BHS gold insurance, I would be asking their legal advice.......tricky situation but the welfare of the horse must come first.
 
If he's on a fb group, could you do a bit of stalking? Try to identify the area he's in, mutual friends etc. Do the previous loaners have an address for him?
 
I assume that the owner did not provide you with a loan agreement.
Do you have the horses passport because that should have been handed over with the horse and had the owners contact details in it.
I would ask the owner for his address and contact telephone numbers.
If he fails to provide them then he is abandoning his horse.
 
Thanks guys, I do have the passport and am `friends' with owner through FB. The address is old as I know he has relocated around xmas from posts on FB. I think I will send him a message asking for phone number and try to speak directly to him. My vet is going to give me a quote for xrays so if he wants them done I can offer to take her - he pay. At least that way he would know what the prognosis is, also if it is worth him treating her. He is also quite well known in a certain community so I don't think he would want to damage his reputation by simply leaving her here. I think he may just hope I am a soft touch and keep her!
 
Limbo1 said:
I think he may just hope I am a soft touch and keep her!
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I think you're right. Time to be brave and strong and insist he takes her back. You've done nothing wrong, so please don't feel any of this is of your making. The risk anyone takes when loaning is that the horse comes back broken through nobody's fault. Horses can become lame overnight with a problem they've had a long time and suddenly it's too much. Him saying "she was never lame with us" is utterly pointless, she's lame now and she's still his responsibility.

I'd try to find an address (try searching the electoral register - long shot as he may not be registered to vote) but if you can't and the only contact you have for him is a mobile number, I'd text him, telling him you're giving formal notice and he has 28 days to collect the mare or you will charge him for livery. Although texting may not be legally binding (there are varying views as to whether they are or not) it should hopefully be enough to prompt him into action.

I wouldn't keep trying to find her a home on Facebook, it just serves to show him you're doing what he wants and taking responsibility for her when you don't have to.

Good luck.
 
You can always use the embarrassment factor if it comes to that. I had to do it myself with a horse on loan, who had an undisclosed back problem and bucked. Her owner had given her to me and then gone to work in a big show jumping yard abroad.

When I messaged on fb to say we needed to drop her back to her mothers I got no response. So a couple of weeks later I left a message on her page that all could read saying that I could only assume she was now abandoning the mare as I had heard nothing from her. Well, with all her horsey friends able to read it she wasn't long answering, saying there was no question of abandonment. It did the trick, but otherwise I may well have been ignored.
 
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