Giving Up

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sarahmagic

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I don't post very often (more of a lurker!) but I'm really upset at the mo and need to get it off my chest. The horse I part loan is nappy and rears when asked go somewhere he doesn't want to. I've ridden a rearer in the past and managed to get her out of it so I decided to persevere with him as he's a nice horse otherwise. He was getting on really well until today when he just threw a complete fit and tried to gallop back to his field. He was rearing upright and leaping when I tried to get him to turn around and basically trying to scare the c**p out of me (it was working!) so I got off him in the end. Probably the wrong thing to do but I could just feel my confidence ebbing away. Anyway, I've decided not to ride him again as he's not even my horse (the owner doesn't ride him and wants to sell him anyway) as its not worth losing my confidence over and also I don't want to make him worse. I'm just feeling really rubbish as it feels like I'm giving in but I'm just not enjoying riding anymore. Problem is the owner wants to sell and I'm worried where he's gonna end up. Sorry for long post but I really needed to get that out after crying all morning.
 
i had a loan horse for 2 weeks as he turned out to be a nitemare !! dragged friend across yard flat out because there was a horse leaving the yard for a ride !! i since found out that hes always like it !!! not what i wanted in a loan horse !!
well when i got new loan horse i worried the whole time he was going to be like last horse,but now know hes totally different and a very good boy apart from not wanting to come in lol lol found out that ex loan horse is up for sale and i worry that hes going to be passed around alot unless she is honest about him and he goes to rite people who will work with him etc !!
dont worry you have done your best to help the horse but you dont want to ruin it for you as having no confidance is horrible when looking for new horse !!
 
It's not worth you risking your life over a horse that isn't even yours. Even if he WERE yours, if he's scaring the sh:t out of you, then IMO it's time to call it a day and get yourself a horse you enjoy.
I can understand that you're worried about where he'll end up if he's sold, but that really isn't your responsibility. I don't know how experienced you are, but there are plenty of professionals who specialise in taking on and improving problem horses and if he is, apart from the rearing, a nice ride and he's not overpriced, someone will take him on.
I assume his tack, back and teeth have been checked to make sure the rearing isn't caused by pain?
 
Don't feel bad - there's a point at which you have to say enough. I tried for 2 years with a horse - long story I won't bore you with - because I just hate giving up. Then I realised I was dreading each day's ride and the battle I knew was coming. I told myself it's supposed to be a pleasure, for God's sake! Let him go and move on. It's harder to get confidence back than to lose it.
 
I think you have done the right thing, I woudn't have even got on it knowing it was nappy and reared!
My first horse was nappy, he used to spin 180 degrees and head back home, That, I could handle, but then he started to buck (only when I was out with a friends mare, never did it on his own or with geldings) I decided he was too dangerous for me as I was a novice (he was sold to me as 100percent everyway, now know there's no such thing)I rang a dealer 10 mins after the last bucking session, she came the next day and took him.
I was a little upset, but I did my best for a year with him. Its the best thing to do as I had some more lessons after, until I found my new lovely pony!
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I think you're doing the right thing, its not worth risking your health and confidence over a horse which isn't even yours. Riding is supposed to be fun. Its so hard to regain your confidence and enjoyment in riding once you've lost it. I know!! Its the owners responsibility to make sure that she sells him responsibly. there are alot of horses out there which will suit you much better. Good luck
 
Thanks for all your replies. I feel a lot better about my decision now, I just have to tell his owner now, which I'm not looking forward to. My old mare used to rear so I thought I could deal with him but he's so violent with his leaping and rearing I'm just losing my confidence - he's never been as bad as he was today - something must have spooked him.

Papa Frita - his back, teeth and tack have all been checked, I think he's just very nappy as he's fine with other horses. I will mention to his owner about sending him to a professional - I would say I am a good rider but this is just one step too far for me!
 
youre doing the right thing, there are safe horses out there and once your confidence is knocked its hard to get it back. i tested a loanhorse that dragged me down the drive, into the road, in a ditch, back up the drive and smashed my car up and it rocked me for weeks and i said never again, ive ridden for 24years, anyway i persevered with another and after alot of work got it back and then bought my own, much safer option! good luck and dont give in.
 
Listen you ride for one reason only and that's to enjoy it!!!
Stop riding this horse, advertise for another locally in shop windows/feed merchants'/tack shops etc, and get back to enjoying what you do..
Don't feel bad, it's the right decision.
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Poor you, it's not nice when you feel your confidence is being zapped from you
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I too have recently been through a similar thing and to tell you the truth, it's not worth it. You have tried your best for the horse and it hasn't got any better, so it is not worth risking your life over. Put it down to experience and move on. Find something that will help your confidence, make you smile and bring the fun back to owning a horse again. I wish you all the luck and keep smiling
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