Got me thinking....

Equus Leather

Equus Leather

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I've just been for my first riding lesson in approx 2 years.

When I got there the (very nice) lady asked me all the usual questions about previous experience, why I stopped riding etc

My standard response has been that I have ridden alot up until about 3 years ago when I had a nasty fall and broke my wrist.

She then said to me how loss of confidence didn't usually come from a fall (especially when i'd had a lot of experience), but from something else. She mentioned a lady who lost all confidence, and after having counselling, it came out that she was grieving for a dog that she'd had put to sleep.

I didn't say anything else, but it got me thinking.

My mum died very suddenly in June 2002. Up until then I had been completing my degree and working (and living) for a family and their horses. I was in charge of 3 horses and a pony and did lots of riding etc. The family moved to New York in October of 2002, just after I'd had the accident I previously described where I broke my wrist in September 2002.

Now, I'd always said that I'd stopped riding because of the accident and I'd lost my nerve, but I wonder if mums death actually had something to do with it.

Thinking on I wonder if it was a 'I can't do something that I enjoy and makes me smile because I should be grieving' think.

Does that make any sense?
 
It does make sense, it's amazing what you sub concious (sp?) thinks about. Was your mum linked to you riding in anyway?
 
I used to be a confident (if not very good rider), and lost my nerve after a series of events, all riding.

I don't mean to be funny, but it sounds like your instructor has made good use of psychology, ie if you don't associate loss of confidence with an accident it will be easier to restore.
 
TBH I think that makes a lot of sense! Maybe that is what confidence comes down to, such as if you loose your confidence about something at work, you won't be very confident when you go out socialising, so it would make sense if it works the same when it comes down to riding, if that made sense?
 
Maybe part and part. But I wouldnt read too much into it, you lose your confidence when you're scared of getting hurt falling off again. Sorry, I'm a bit of a cynic when it comes to these things.
 
Well, I'm a bit of a cynic like t'other Kate so I'd probably think the instructor was being a bit melodramatic if it was me.... but, if it struck a chord with you then there may well be a good reason - only you know your inner self after all.

Did you enjoy the lesson? Going back?
 
Strikes me you've conquered the problem - well done. I use to persecute myself over such matters and try to seek ways of amending what I perceived to be mistakes. However, this is foolish as I cannot change the past. We all too often suppose our lives should be perfect a bit like a wedding in an Amercian film a perfect idealic moment for most of us it is not made up that way. A chap called Dr Jung always believed that through suffering we were able to deal better with our day to day emotions, little consolation in that I know but it is something to build upon.

Get on that horse........
 
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