GRRRRRR So hard not to say anything!!!

S

showpony

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Raging at moment - know should prob not be bothered as not my horse but seriously raging @ a new livery!
Girl is a complete beginner, rode a handful of times last year & fancied the idea of owning her own horse & she has said sure if it doesnt' work out she can just sell the horse on!
She hangs off horses mouth in rising trot but to be fair is taking lessons to improve this.
She has been up to the yard once in past week to see her horse, and expected it to be tacked up for her .... She has just about mastered putting a headcollar on but myself & couple of other people have been trying to help her with tacking up , rugging up etc but she just doens't seem to get it! She doesn't know how to groom etc & the horse is a kicker! very very bad with its back legs being touched - so much so that horse booted my friend in the leg last nigh with such force she was slammed into the back wall of the stable...
Seriously I think people should have to do some sort of a course in stable management or at least give a S*** about learning and asking questions before owning a horse. Later when I go up I will prob give horse a brush just to make her feel semi wanted as feel so bad for her
 
Unfortunately this happens all the time :( Yard where my boy is they loan ponies to young (well 14 yr old) girls. One girl cannot hang onto her pony bringing her in and pone now knows that she can step sideways and she will let go! Proper annoying when they are then loose in the lane and if I want to bring mine in i have to help her just so i can get by. I also had an Arab on loan a few yars abck cos some stupid woman GAVE her 11 year old grand daughter an Irish Sports Horse and this loopy Arab when she had only been riding for a few weeks! Its madnedd :(
 
Honestly after seeing this time and time again the best thing you can do is to not get involved. It will bite you straight in the ass (your help not the horse!). There is nothing you can do. You will only get hurt and for what? Do you think the horse cares if its wanted or not or just where the next meal is coming from? And if something goes drastically wrong who do you think is going to get it in the neck? Is she paying you? choose reason over emotion.
 
I think some people don't want to learn and others are too scared to ask.

I find sometimes you get shot down if you ask something silly. I have several times (not in RL though, they're very helpful) and I just ended up feeling silly and like a bad horsewoman because I had to ask.
Though I'm almost as guilty! A girl has started riding out with us, she's a teenager but only just started riding and I was shocked that I thought "Good grief girl, don't do that, how can you not know that?!" when I saw her tacking up a horse badly.
I didn't say it to her, or anyone else, but I thought it and I felt mean. I decided to go and give her a helping hand and she was so grateful and learnt for next time.

The girl you are talking about sounds like she doesn't really 'get' horses, but there are a lot of people, including me, who sometimes maybe don't ask when they should because they're scared.
 
Its just so frustrating as know so many people with bags of experience who just can't afford to own a horse but if they did horse would be well looked after.
Am trying my best to try to help her when she bothers to come up but tbh there is only so much I can do to help if she just interested in learning & taking advice on board.
 
Doesn't anyone run pony club where she can learn the basics? Not really fair on the horse if she can't take care of it. Or give her an idiots guide to horses...
 
Yard I am at is super friendly & all the liverys have been trying to help... no one is unapproachable where we are & owner is super friendly & outgoing so don't think its a case of being too shy to ask! Im far from super experienced & have felt like a numpty at times with some of the questions I have asked !

Nah said:
I think some people don't want to learn and others are too scared to ask.

I find sometimes you get shot down if you ask something silly. I have several times (not in RL though, they're very helpful) and I just ended up feeling silly and like a bad horsewoman because I had to ask.
Though I'm almost as guilty! A girl has started riding out with us, she's a teenager but only just started riding and I was shocked that I thought "Good grief girl, don't do that, how can you not know that?!" when I saw her tacking up a horse badly.
I didn't say it to her, or anyone else, but I thought it and I felt mean. I decided to go and give her a helping hand and she was so grateful and learnt for next time.

The girl you are talking about sounds like she doesn't really 'get' horses, but there are a lot of people, including me, who sometimes maybe don't ask when they should because they're scared.
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Don't help her; tell her. And suggest that she gets some intensive lessons in horse management at a good yard - some yards will tailor a few "information days" for complete beginners (I know of one in Meath that does this).
 
showpony said:
Yard I am at is super friendly & all the liverys have been trying to help... no one is unapproachable where we are & owner is super friendly & outgoing so don't think its a case of being too shy to ask! Im far from super experienced & have felt like a numpty at times with some of the questions I have asked !
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Ooh yea, mine is good too :) but on this website and others, it can be very hard to ask questions without people thinking you're a moron!
 
It is sad really, owner and horse probably so miss matched something is waiting to go wrong. I did nvq one and two and both horse owner certificates part time before I got mine and sons horse. We have a beginner on our yard who came this weekend and we told her we were very willing to teach her things she did not know but we don't wish to interfere so she must ask us if she feels lost. Our yard owner is v good too.
 
Good thing about the net though aside from forums is just typing in your question and bobs your uncle. There are loads of web pages on basic horse care.
 
Coldfeet! said:
Good thing about the net though aside from forums is just typing in your question and bobs your uncle. There are loads of web pages on basic horse care.
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This is definately very helpful but IMO not so useful when it comes to handling horses and dealing with their little oddities and is no substitute for hands on experience. There is knowledge and there is the application of knowledge. I'm really fortunate to have friend's with horses who've shown me how to tack up and groom and lead safely. This has allowed me to apply what I've learnt with safe hands to guide me when I messed up.
OP..I know your frustration and have first hand experience with less than good horse ownership and first time horse owners who's riding ability is questionable and the poor horse ends up on the receiving end and getting the blame when things go wrong. Hopefully your YO will step in and advise. Personally I have real issues with people who have a few lessons then decide they know it all and get a horse of their own.
 
Tbh, whilst I wouldn't recommend it I don't have an issue with it if the horse is on a good full livery yard, with good staff & a ym who'll supervise, if the person is eager to learn. It only bothers me when its not full livery & the horses welfare is compromised.
 
Trasm,

I agree, I did say horse care, agreed no subsitute for hands on, I read lots of books before I even got anywhere near a horse and although I had the care aspect information to hand (although these days even with abundance of information around people still dont do their homework or research) I dont think I have known a single person not to have had to have some hands on with people around who are willing to show you whats what.

Everyone has to learn from scratch and I always try and help a beginner. I am still learning even after all this time.
 
I hate to say this but do not become involved, it really will bite you on the bum. I am afraid this where I started with horse ownership, but to be fair I had ridden as a teenager and then re-started much, much later. I had riding lessons for about 8 months, plus some stable management lessons from my instructor, but I then bought my cob and oh my god did I learn the hard way.

The trouble is, us as horse owners are so judgemental, and from what I have seen of the horse world, we all think that we are the best people to ride and handle horses. OK, I know this really isnt true, and to be fair I would probably be gnashing my teeth in frustration as well. If she is on full livery then let the YO put her right. I always take the view that as long as there is no downright cruelty involved, how a fellow livery rides and treats their horse is their concern.

My story was a little different though. I was on full livery, YO and instrucor and YM helped me out, and although I had to muddle through on occasions (like now knowing how to attach a saddle cloth to a saddle, not knowing how to his his brand new martingale on ......), I managed to come out of it with some knowledge of basic horse care and I suspect this young lady will either sink or swim herself.
 
Honestly, who sold her the horse? Outrageous. Poor girl, talk about steep learning curve. I would leave it to the YO to guide her and explain the basics. I would be very nervous allowing an inexperienced person near the horse if it is a bit free with the feet, even if it is her horse.
 
A Dealer:rolleyes: - tbh its an accident waiting to happen

RebelRebel said:
Honestly, who sold her the horse? Outrageous. Poor girl, talk about steep learning curve. I would leave it to the YO to guide her and explain the basics. I would be very nervous allowing an inexperienced person near the horse if it is a bit free with the feet, even if it is her horse.
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More fool the yard manager having a livery like that up there! Tell the livery it is her she should be turning to for help not you.
 
Stay well away. Offer a friendly hand if she ever wants it, then wait to be asked, don't just interfere (say by inviting yourself to grrom the horse). It is the YO responsibility to ensure horses are kept, & if it is full livery it really is no business of yours. Not condoning her lack of knowledge/interest, but it is nothing to do with you unless the horse is suffering in which case report it to authorities. If another livery decided to interfere in how I kept my girls because their standards/ideas were different from mine I would be very angry.
 
Sorry if im being stupid but people keep saying to stay away as its full livery but where did the OP say that? Or am i being blind? lol.
 
Sam_1985 said:
Sorry if im being stupid but people keep saying to stay away as its full livery but where did the OP say that? Or am i being blind? lol.
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I've made the assumption that the horse is on full livery, as the owner does not see to it daily.

OP has neither confirmed or denied this.
 
showpony said:
.... very very bad with its back legs being touched - so much so that horse booted my friend in the leg last nigh with such force she was slammed into the back wall of the stable...
Later when I go up I will prob give horse a brush just to make her feel semi wanted as feel so bad for her
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Why was your friend in the stable in a position to be kicked in the first place? And why would you be thinking of giving the horse a brush yourself?

It is NOT your horse and as long as it is being fed, watered and mucked out then it should be of no concern to yourself.

If the horse is on full or assisted livery then the yard manager/owner should be the only person apart from the owner who deals with the horse on a daily basis.
 
amymay said:
I've made the assumption that the horse is on full livery, as the owner does not see to it daily.

OP has neither confirmed or denied this.
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ahh okies. Just making sure my eyes are still working properly. lol. Does seem like its full livery as the girl hasnt been there but I was thinking that it could have been someone else seeing to horse for her (i.e. friend or something).

In that case if horse is on full livery and that is the arrangement not much OP can do if the girl doesnt turn up!
 
Eh Friend works @ the yard! She was in taking horses rug off as owner didn't know how to! Would give the horse a brush if owner decides to show up today ( she was there last monday ) to show her the basics!

SallyBatty said:
Why was your friend in the stable in a position to be kicked in the first place? And why would you be thinking of giving the horse a brush yourself?

It is NOT your horse and as long as it is being fed, watered and mucked out then it should be of no concern to yourself.

If the horse is on full or assisted livery then the yard manager/owner should be the only person apart from the owner who deals with the horse on a daily basis.
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