Had her for 5 months but..

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swampdonkey

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Hi all, need advise, feel like giving in. As I said I have had my new horse for 5 months now but I just don't enjoy riding her, she is strong and stubbon but not dangerous, she pulls faces and tests me on the ground quite a lot still. I am having lessons every week but still find her hard work to ride and very rarely enjoy it. Do I give it more time and stick with her, I don't compete and have no desire to, just want to hack and school, but everything feels so difficult with her. She is not my 1st horse, I had my ex riding school plod for 3 years so she is completely different. I know she's a good safe horse but its supposed to be more fun than this, isn't it?
 
I personally think that if things are like this after 5 months, they aren't going to change, if you dislike riding this horse, and looking after it, it simply is not the right horse for you. You shouldn't feel bad about it. She may be 100% the right horse for someone else.
 
If its not fun, then its not right. Owning a horse, and in many cases riding a horse should be a pleasurable experience, and if it's getting you down then something isn't clicking. It's not the end of the world, and if you get slated for it, then bad on them.
It will be entirely up to you if you sell, but by the sounds of it, it is the best decision. Good luck.
 
Too be totally honest I would sell her.

I had Beacon for 8 years and I love him dearly he was a loving kind horse. BUT very hard to ride, he was slow off the leg, would stop and run out, spooky hacking, he was too strong for me a lot of the time. I could never really get him to work well in a nice outline, from behind etc.

The part where you say 'everything is so difficult with her' is just how it was with Beacon

I bought Micah a year ago and the difference is incredible!!!!!!!! I would never go through a 'Beacon' again
 
so not the response I expected to get, thank you I do feel better. I have really tried with her but expected people to say work at it harder. Part of me feels that I should continue with her as she does nothing bad, but I just don't think I'm a good enough rider for her, she needs to be ridden 'properly' if not she spooks at everything and pulls faces. I want to improve my riding but want something a bit more willing to work with me. I haven't told anyone how I feel but feel better now for sharing it. Thanks for replys.
 
I'm going through the same thing at the moment after nearly the same amount of time, nothing seems to be easy. I really do love her and she'll be a wonderful horse for somebody as she is really talented and has done allsorts, but I'm the same as you and just want to hack out and do the odd bit of schooling. I'm not enjoying it and to be honest I think my confidence is actually being chipped away at gradually, so I'm looking around to see what is out there. I don't think there is any shame in admitting a horse isn't for you, and I keep thinking that if I'm not enjoying it, it can't really be much fun for the horse either...
 
My current horse I only have because she had belonged to someone who'd struggled for 5 months and admitted she'd not bought the right horse. My girl now has a (hopefully) home for life, she's perfect for me. Person I got her from has a very different type of horse, also I'd guess in a home for life. That means 4 of us now totally happy with our lot, because someone had the strength to say "This isn't the horse for me".
 
I also think she isn't horse for you. Yes all horses can have their days where they are spooky or a pain in the bum but the majority of the time you should be smiling and feel happy when you ride your horse. You should wake up in the morning and look forward to riding, you shouldn't dread it. Perhaps you need to find her another home x
 
Forgot to add I got my horse (in sig) because he wasn't 'the one' for his old owner. I had him on loan first before I brought him to make sure he was right. He is perfect for me, I find him the easiest, most pleasurable horse in the world. It's not a bad thing to admit you don't click, you don't expect to get on with every person you meet. It's the same thing I think :)
 
It takes guts to recognise that a particular horse is not for you. I struggled with a really tricky little mare for 3 years. It took us a year just to build a relationship where she was not trying to kill me all the time. In her particular case, I struggled on with her because she'd had a really tough time in her previous home and been neglected badly, so I could understand a certain degree of unwillingness to attach to a new owner.
I was very lucky because she did respond to me eventually and we went from a love : hate relationship (I loved her, she hated me) to one of grudging mutual respect. People who had known her from when I got her commented on what a nice horse she had become.
But I always knew from day 1 that she was never going to be my 'forever horse', we just didn't bond that way. She was, however, finally able to be rehomed as a companion / hack with a knowledgable lady in a lovely home where I believe she will live out the rest of her days.
We learnt a lot from each other, and I don't regret for one day the time I spent with her, the broken bones, the bruises, the skin ripped from the palms of my hands, the ruined clothes, the mornings late for work...
Sometimes horses are just 'loaned' to us as a halfway house between two homes. There's nothing wrong with playing foster mum for a few months and then realising that you both need something different.
I hope it all works out for the best for you both
xxx
 
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