Happy birthday to me!!

H

Hovis_and_SidsMum

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Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear meeee, happy birthday to me.

I'm on client site in Cardiff, my Dads not good at the moment, I'm not seeing the Destroyer til tomorrow and I am generally miffed off.
Tell me some funny horse stories / jokes or something to brighten an otherwise dull birthday pretty please?
 
Happy Birthday to You :D

Cardiff is by the sea, so :D

Fingers tightly crossed for your Dad.

The Destroyer will have saved up some lovely slobbery kisses for you :D:D:D

And I'll sing...:D:D:cool::eek:

Hippo Birdy two ewe!
Hippo Birdy two ewe :D
Hippo Birdy deer Hovis n Sids Muuuuuum,
Hippo Birdy two eeeeewwwwweeee.
 
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUUUUU:D:D:D:D

I'm sure the Destroyer is spending the day organising a party for you.
Look forward to reading about it on Friday!!:D:eek::rolleyes:
 
Happy Birthday to you!!!

Ok here's the only horsey joke I know and it's really, really bad.......


How do you spell hungry horse by just using 4 letters?


M T G G
 
Here's a silly horsey joke for you...

Q: How many legs do horses have?

A: Ten - 2 x forelegs and 2 x hindlegs. (2 x 4 legs - geddit?)

Happy Birthday HASM and best wishes to your Dad.
 
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Happy birthday!!!!!

A horse walks into a bar and the barman says "why the long face?"

Hope my joke cheered you up :D
 
Q: Why did the pony have to gargle?
A: Because it was a little horse!

Q: What did the horse say when it fell?
A: I've fallen and I can't giddyup!

Q: What do you call a horse that lives next door?
A: A neigh-bor!

Q: When does a horse talk?
A: Whinney wants to!


Murphy's Horse Laws
• No one ever notices how you ride until you fall off.
• The least useful horse in your stable will eat the most, require shoes every four weeks, and need the vet at least once a month
• A horse's misbehaviour will be in direct proportion to the number of people who are watching.
• Your favourite tack always gets chewed on, and your new rug gets torn.
• Tack you hate will never wear out, and rugs you hate cannot be destroyed.
• Horses you hate cannot be sold and will outlive you.
• Clipper blades will become dull when your horse is half clipped.
• If you approach within 50 feet of your stable yard in clean clothes, you will get dirty.
• The number of horses you own will increase to the number of stables in your yard.
• Your stables will fall down without bailing twine.
• Hoof picks always run away from home.
• If you fall off, you will land on the site of your most recent injury.
• If you are winning, then quit, because there is only one way to go. Down!

How do you...
induce labour in a mare? Take a nap.
cure equine constipation? Load them in a clean trailer.
get a horse to wash his own feet? Clean the water trough and fill it with fresh water.
get a mare to come in season? Take her to a show.
get a mare in foal the first cover? Let the wrong stallion get out of his stall.
make sure that a mare has that beautiful, perfectly marked foal you always wanted? Sell her before she foals.
get a dressage horse to work perfectly and really stretch? Get him out late at night or anytime no one is around to see him.
induce a cold snap in the weather? Clip a horse.
make it rain? Mow a field of hay.
make a small fortune in the horse business? Start with a large one.
 
Happy birthday to you :D (Iwon't sing, 'cos I can't carry a tune in a bucket)
Can't rememberany horse jokes, but do know that our lot think I am the joke :D :D I give them hours of ammusement!
The whole bally lot of them had a great time watching me and (elderly) father building the stable for the new girl, I will swear that they were taking bets on which of us would fall off the ladder first! :D

Hope your Dad gets well soon (isn't it difficult when we have to worry about them?)
 
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