Have i done wrong?

J

jacksmum

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Just wondered what other views are really. Yard i am on is all adults and they have a monthly visit from a 'top rider' (3DE) Said rider doesn't suit me as i do pure dressage so i have my own trainer who i travel to, anyway good friend on yard had a really bad lesson with said rider (on the flat) that ended up severly denting her confidence so i mentioned my trainer as she is very good at confidence building. So this week took my friend to my trainer for lesson, but this was done as YO and YO sidekick were away for two days and they wouldn't know, now i did know she went cause they were away but at no point did i lie to anybody. Bear with me i am getting to the point! So today friend told YO and YOs sidekick what she'd done and got the 'you've hurt our feelings' cr*p, but i have just found out i am the one getting the very adult thing called 'the silent treatment' and seem to be being blamed for taking her
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So question is did i do wrong in taking friend to a lesson with my trainer and not asking their permmision as she was too scared to? Be honest as i am obviously seeing it just from my side.
God i hate yard politics
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Thanks for bearing with it
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Your friend can have lessons with whoever they want. So what if you reccommend them someone, not every instructor suits every rider. Its not up to said YO and YO sidekick, if it didn't work out it didn't work out, especially since your friends confudence knocked.
 
OMG, how bl00dy annoyingly petty are people!!! It really pi55es me off to think that you cannot make your own decisions on who you want to train you, who the hell do they think they are anyway, GOD?????

You've done absolutely NOTHING wrong, so don't feel the least bit ashamed, they're BIG FAT EGO has been dented, is all, grrr grrr grrr
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No you didnt do anything wrong, you or your friend can have lessons with whoever you want, after all they are your horses.
 
Totally agree - it's not up to yard owner or sidekick to run your friends life. I hate issues like that - it's her horse, her life and her riding so what's it to do with the YO?
 
you certainly didn't do anything wrong in my book!
if they aren't adult enough to realise that every rider benefits by seeing another trainer then that's their problem.
the important thing is that your friend felt she got something from the lesson, be it confidence or a few tips.
my two instructors have this outlook, and frequently refer their customers to other instructors for more help.
the instructor I see most says of riding lessons that..."instructors are like a DIY store, and your brain is like a toolbox. the more time you spend picking things up in a number of DIY stores and filling up your toolbox, the more likely you are to be able to fix a problem at home!"
 
Why does ur friend need permission? Surely she can have lessons with whoever she wants seeing as it wan't actually on the yard? Some YOs are def nutters!!
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Why should you have to get YO permission to take YOUR horses out to another trainer?!?! That's ridiculous. You and your friend can do whatever you like with your horses and get taught by whoever you like. Hope your YO and sidekick grow up soon!
 
Thanks guys, unfortunately YO and YO sidekick have a brown nose following on our yard and i was starting to feel like i had been a naughty school girl! They are strong personalities but this has opened my eyes to how petty they are. Anybody know of a nice yard in Oxfordshire?!
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You have not done anything wrong.

You both pay for the YO for a service (livery) and your friend can go wherever she likes with her horse. Permission from YO not required!

Although, I hate yard politics, I rubbish at it and usually annoy someone!
 
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