Heartbroken. My friend just died ?

Gusbear

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My YO (who is a close friend) just called to tell me my friend (her horse and mine share a field), died in her sleep on Christmas Day. I’m beyond heartbroken. She was only 44, had just started a new job that she loved and had also started seeing a lovely guy recently. My dear friend had made arrangements to have her ashes scattered in our horses field. I offered to buy her horse however my lovely YO has offered to keep him on livery free of charge for the rest of his life. All the liveries of which there are a dozen of us have promised to take turns to groom, feed and exercise her dearly loved horse. I can’t stop crying. I’ve never lost a friend before like this and in all honesty I’m really struggling tp deal with it. I’ve been crying non stop for 5 hours. She was such a lovely soul, so kind, so bubbly and a one of a kind good person. I’ll miss her for sure. I’m feeling so very lost. I’ve not felt this sad in years. I just wish she was still here ?
 

PapaverFollis

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I'm so sorry, Gusbear. What a dreadful shock for you. Have a big virtual hug from me. I recommend a cup of tea with a sugar in it and get yourself wrapped up in a blanket. This will take some processing so be very kind to yourself. x
 

luckyoldme

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I'm so sorry Gusbear.
Any thing any of us say right now can't Evan touch the sides of the way you are feeling.
Loosing someone so young and so unexpectedly is traumatic and very hard to come to terms with.
I m so sorry you are going through this.xx
 

Gusbear

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Thanks guys. It’s so surreal at present. I was only talking with her at the yard last week. She leaves behind a wheelchair bound mum with emphysema who relied on her for support. I’m struggling to comprehend how to deal with her mum and losing my friend. I know she had other family members to help with her mum so she’s ok it seems but how to accept a vibrant and lively women would simply die in her sleep simply has floored me TBH. It’s certainly hit me for six. Wherever she now now I’m sure is a much nicer place than where we all are at present.
 

Pearlsasinger

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What an awful shock for you! Try to take some comfort from the fact that wouldn't know anything about it. What a sensible person she was to have set out a plan for the worst case.
 

pistolpete

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I’m so sorry you have lost this friend. Really very shocking circumstances and you will have many stages of grief ahead to face. Take comfort in the fact that her beloved horse has a secure future with your lovely YO and you and other liveries. The tears are part of the process your eyes will be sore for a long time. It’s so very sad someone so young dying suddenly but at least there was minimal/no suffering. You have to find your own way to deal with such loss. Some like to be busy others like to stay quiet and alone. Do what works for you and give yourself time. Lots of time. Life does go in and some time in the future your first thought in the morning of her won’t be of this sad tie but of joyful times you spent together. I’m so sorry. Christmas will have a new meaning for you now. Sending gentle virtual hugs.
 

Nicnac

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So sorry to read this. Unexpected death knocks one for six. Unbelievably sad. What lovely friends you are to take on her beloved horse.
 

Mrs. Jingle

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How awful for you and all who knew her. Such a young age to be taken, and especially hard to deal with such tragic and unforeseen circumstances. I am so sorry and please take care of yourself at a very difficult time.
 
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