Hello, new here & some tips to convert non-horsey OH!

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Dinkz82

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Hello all, first post so please be kind!

Have been missing my horsey fix as spend the last 18months sidelined due to various injurys (one horsey, one not). Still in recovery mode after a recent op and was hoping to go to watch some events while I can't ride but catch is I live abroad and don't have horsey friends here!

So, as you might have guessed need to get boyfriend interested enough to come with me! He has never been around horses but loves other animals and countryside so I have some hope of success..

Anyone any tips or past experience to share?

Thanks in advance :)

X
 
Welcome! Hope you are making a good recovery.
My advice is don't encourage any interest in horses. If you do, he'll know how much it all costs! Easier to hide a horse (s) when they don't go anywhere near the yard.
No I don't speak from experience.... really ;-)
 
Are you CobRambler!? Only joking, welcome! I don't think there is much you can do apart from trying to include him if you can but I strongly think going from experience you can get someone interested to a point but if that spark doesn't ignite then it's probably not going too. Where are you? When do you get back in the saddle? We having riding clubs and fun rides etc here is there anything like that?
 
Ditto hope you feel better soon!

I wouldn't try to cultivate an interest in horses, think of the effect of a pushy parent, it's similar! If your partner knows it is important to you that he makes an effort to go along to things with you, then I am sure he will want to make you happy :-)

My partner has gradually got more into it, first he would just walk down with me occasionally to see the horse, then he would sometimes help poo pick, hold while I was getting on... Then I got a tiny companion pony who he loves and grooms, does her rugs, learnt about handling (she is a youngster so not super easy but this has helped him grow in confidence), he feeds them when I am away and I was very proud when he put the big horse's fly rug on the other day as he didn't want her to be irritated :-) he is super good like this though and I make an effort to embrace his interests and not moan when he plays computer games etc!
 
I have challenged my oh's arrogant side. He can't understand why it is so hard to ride after all you just sit there right...?!? So he's challenged me to find a horse big enough (he's 6ft4 and built like a tank) and he will learn to ride. I obviously know how addictive it is so if he likes it great, he can come along and if not he might realise what hard work it is riding and stop telling me how easy it is!!
I also have him helping at the yard by doing things that appeal to him, he's pretty handy so he built me a mounting block and will put up shelves lights etc. In fairness my horse didn't make the best impression, first time oh actually came to help my horse head butted him right in the face!!
 
hope u get better soon...
tbh, i have never seen any successful conversion from non-horsey to horsey...
i think either u have it from the beginning or have not...
:)
 
Hello, thanks for the replys!

I needed to have my cruciate ligament repaired so full recovery 6-9months (am one month in!) hence need to do something until then, after having let my h&h subscription lapse started viewing online and discovered the forum so that's keeping me occupied :)

Sorry to disappoint but am not cobrambler, not likely to be abandoned foals on my doorstop living in the middle of a city ;)

Old nag.. See where you are coming from on this one, will keep in mind if ever manage to fully own again! My mum manage do hide the fact we had two horses rather than one from my dad for at least a year!

Hnmisty.. Last time I rode regularly here it was in the evening after work and we had a buffet and wine after horses put away for the night (never seen such a thing in uk) so could be a plan.

Mandwhy... Will see how it goes, am sure if I had my own he would be happy to help and become attached but sadly not in owning position (yet!)

What are thought on going to a badminton/Olympia? How do other halfs handle this?

Thanks again
X
 
DO NOT get him into horses!!! other half is a farrier and shows horses as well and that is all we ever argue about. Would rather have one that doesn't show any interest at all instead of always telling me the things I'm not doing right or should be doing or what I should be feeding etc etc etc
 
StoptheCavalry said:
I have challenged my oh's arrogant side. He can't understand why it is so hard to ride after all you just sit there right...?!? So he's challenged me to find a horse big enough (he's 6ft4 and built like a tank) and he will learn to ride. I obviously know how addictive it is so if he likes it great, he can come along and if not he might realise what hard work it is riding and stop telling me how easy it is!!
I also have him helping at the yard by doing things that appeal to him, he's pretty handy so he built me a mounting block and will put up shelves lights etc. In fairness my horse didn't make the best impression, first time oh actually came to help my horse head butted him right in the face!!
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Ah, I used to really enjoy the 'but the horse does it all'' comments. The only time oh saw me ride I managed to fall off with accident number 1, dosent help my argument ;) well done on training for yard job !
 
Maybe buy him a driving lesson? Lots of men do that, the horse is a bit "incidental" to the nuts/bolts/disc brakes etc. Good luck.
 
Haha I can't believe she managed to hide that from him for a year! I forget to tell my dad we have four (three on loan) instead of just one :p he doesn't live near and is a technophobe lucky for me.

Wishing you a speedy recovery.
 
Dinkz82 said:
What are thought on going to a badminton/Olympia? How do other halfs handle this?
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My oh came to Badminton with me last year and loved it. My horsey friend came along to with her non-horsey oh and we all had a fab time. Definitely worth a shot I reckon. I'm trying to persuade my oh ATM that a horse of my own would be a good idea - he's desperate to get fitter and lose some weight so I've told him that helping me out with a horse would be perfect - can't beat a spot of poo picking toe the old arm muscles ;) Not sure he's so keen but I'm working on it haha!

All the best with your recovery, am sure you'll be back in the saddle in no time.
 
Why not ask OH to meet you half way?

Me and my hubby don't share common hobbies (I ride a pony - he rides a motorbike) - My hubby will go with me to horsey events so long as I go with him to Bike shows. It's not a case of converting them - but of giving a bit to your partner even if it's not your thing - to make them happy and support their interests (Oh - and try not to yawn whilst he's explaining the inner workings of his hobby - because yours probably makes him think the same :) ).

Hope you get better soon OP xxx
 
I've managed to get my partner into horses, just enough to be helpful and understanding and not enough to be a pain. He had never touched a horse before we meet, so a big change. He comes down the yard a few times a week, will help do all the chores, poo pick, mend fencing, feed, muck out, etc. we normally do them together and have a natter when do, but sometimes he will do on his own, like if I'm ill. It's lovely knowing he will help and enjoy it, although he has no desire to get in the saddle. I can send him off the country store to pick up bedding/ feed etc, and he knows how much I spend on the horse per month £500+ (eeeeek!) but it doesn't bother him. But I've had to put on part livery as we had no time together on our own. As with my son, horse and a full time job there is very little time left to be a couple so the horse has had to give a little bit. Having said that the horse is the happiest I've ever seen him (moved yards to do part livery) so that's a big plus. But most of all he puts up with my saddle woes, I'm on my 5th one this year! He is so understanding is amazing, I love my OH.
 
mrogers said:
DO NOT get him into horses!!! other half is a farrier and shows horses as well and that is all we ever argue about. Would rather have one that doesn't show any interest at all instead of always telling me the things I'm not doing right or should be doing or what I should be feeding etc etc etc
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^^ This ^^

My BF can be a dreadful know-it-all when he thinks he knows about something and I'd hate it if he got involved with horses! He very occasionally comes to the yard and will do jobs while he's there (and have found him giving the pony cuddles when he thinks I'm not looking!), but he has nothing other than a passing interest. I compete and he's never yet even seen me ride, let alone been to watch a competition. He *might* come to a HT I'm doing tomorrow but TBH I'd almost rather he doesn't as he's nervous about me jumping and I don't want his nerves to rub off on me!

OP, I say enjoy having your time away from the OH with the horses! I have a BF-free weekend this weekend (he's gone off to do man things; I've had a lesson this morning, XC course walking in a min then HT tomorrow) and really enjoying it rather a lot! ;)
 
I have my horses at home and have done for a year and a half, my partner used to see them about once a year before we moved here, I went away to my Mums last weekend and left him to look after both my horses, dog and guinea pig he said he was knackered and never doing it again lol!

No seriously he has got much more envolved we bought a little horsebox and he drives me to shows and stuff and he really enjoys it, its much harder for him to not be envolved now as they are on our doorstep, just take him down the yard and see how you get on he might love it you never know.
 
Mine was anti horse until I started looking for a new one. He bought it for me for my birthday and ever since he's taken an interest! We even got him a schoolmaster to learn on last year. Have to say it was pure fluke though. I don't think you can convince anyone to like anything, they have to find their own way into it.
 
hello, thanks all for the advice, consensus seems to be aim for him having an appreciation of horses rather than become an equestrian himself :)

Hopefully we will manage a trip to Badminton next year (limiting to the Saturday with plenty of action!) and see how we go from there. I might even go to watch some car racing in return ;)

And unless he is mad keen will leave him at home when i finally get to go riding myself, better still could schedule for when his parents visit.. lol

Well done to all the ladies who have OH's that help out or even buy horsies for them - think thats the defnition of ''a keeper''!!

Thanks again
 
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