HELP! Clingy companion...

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Overgrown Pony

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Hey guys

I only brought my horse and his new companion home on the 25th Feb so i'm maybe worrying about nothing and they'll settle in. They have instantly become so attached to each other that I can't ride my horse as I can't take him out the field away her. She screams her head off, runs up and down the fenceline and winds him up something cronic (all 17.2hh of him). I have them at home so there are no other horses around.

I understand that they're probably insecure with a new home and everything is new.

I've been taking him out the field (in a Richard Maxwell halter for safety), grooming him, feeding him and then putting him back in for the last week and she's not much calmer. Where I tie him up she can see him so I just give her a feed and she stands eating and watching. It's when i'm leading him in/out that I have the problems. I'm too worried to hack him out incase she hurts herself. I also need to ride down a track that runs parallel to our field for about 200yards to get to our hacking.

I've only managed to ride him 4 times since I brought them home (they are from different yards and she's just on loan) and that was because I got a chum to ride her out with me. I really don't want to have to rely on other people to come along so I can ride my horse.

Help! Am I worrying about nothing and they'll settle... Or do I get a replacement companion that's old and doddery and doesn't care about being left?

Cheers xx
 
I think I'll have this problem in two weeks when I move my two to live at home!

The only way forward is to get another pony to keep the companion company :D I'm hoping for another highland.

Have you tried giving the companion some food or a hay net when you leave her? Can you shut her inside?
 
I could try tacking him up in the field and hope he doesn't go too scatty with her being daft bombing up and down the fence line when I take him away. She'll just have to get used to it. Got to go through the rough to get to the smooth sometimes I suppose.
 
Did you check with preivous owners to see what she would be like when shes alone? it might not be a bond to your Horse as such, but she doesn't want to be alone at all! could you get another Pony? you could try a loan from a rescue centre. That way when you take your boy out, your Mare will have another Horse for a companion.
 
Hey LaurenBay

Yes the owner of the companion mare said she was fine left on her own at the last yard and that she must just really love my horse... I hope it's just going to take some time and when they both feel secure and settled things will calm down. I really don't have room for a 3rd as I only have 1.5 acres. Plus what would happen when a chum comes to ride the mare and then the 3rd companion is on it's own?! It would be never ending :) My other thought would be to get a couple of wee shetlands instead of the mare if she doesn't settle. Would be a shame though as she's very gentle and great in every other way.
 
Give her a pile of hay in the field, even in middle of summer. make up a feed for her but don't give it to her. If she likes carrot-balls, chop up some carrots and put into a carrot ball but don't give it to her.

Tack up the boy. When you're ready to go. Deep breath. Calm. Give her the feed and the carrot ball. She is loose in the field.

Mount your boy and ride off. Don't look behind. Trot and get going, get out of sight smartly and don't look back. Be gone for 15 mins and come back.

She might be sweaty and you might feel awful. Don't.

Repeat 5 times a week. Up the time-away. Once she can go half-hour, she can go 1 hour, 2 hrs.

Calmness and repetition are the key. She will realise that you go and you come back. She will associate you going with her being fed nice things.

A few months will also make a huge difference as once she feels more settled in the field herself, she will mind less when the boy goes out.

I wouldn't stable her because (a) you haven't got a stable, (b) she might kick it to pieces and (c) you want her to stay in the field, not the stable, so start as you mean to go along.

PS when you come back, it's normal that she will whinny for him as soon as she hears his hoofbeats, so don't expect her to be quiet.

(My gelding lives in a 1.9 acre field with a companion - orignally a laminitic whinnying Shetland, then a Welsh who was good, now a 2yo (bought as a 10mth old) gelding). The first 2 were easy, the 2yo needed the way I've described above.
 
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We had this problem and got a third (now a 4th!) pony to stop it. WHW have loads of Shetlands and other ponys in need of new homes if you do think about getting another companion. Or could you rent out a space to someone else or put one of them on part loan so you have someone to ride with?
 
Suechoccy, that sounds like fantastic advise... thank you so much for taking the time to write that out. I just need to suck it up, take the bull by the horns and follow this plan of action.

SNORKEY cheers for your reply. I'd love to take on a heap of waifs and strays but I just don't have the land to do it unfortunately.

Thanks guys :)
 
Exactly, you're in similar situation to me - small piece of land, got one riding horse, got a 2nd one to keep him/her company. No acreage (or time or money in my case!) for a 3rd, so 2 has to work.
 
I had a similar problem when I got my companion horse. I couldn't leave the companion in the field on her own initially, as she would stress beyond belief. I used to stable her every time I rode, but I appreciate that you don't have that option.
Eventually, after about 18 months, she just decided that she was happy out on her own and could cope until her friend returned. One day she simply didn't bother to follow me to the gate when I went to ride, and hasn't bothered ever since. She does have company over the fence though but now doesn't stress if even they go at the same time.
For me, it was about being patient and just continuing to ride and separate them when needed. My companion mare still calls when I leave the yard and when I'm on the way home. I can hear her from about half a mile away! However, I'm told she's quiet and relaxed whilst I'm out.
On the other hand, I can't take the companion mare out and leave my ridden mare on her own in the field as she stresses! Luckily, I never really need to do that. For the first few weeks I did wonder what I'd done, as the two were almost inseperable. I think it comes down to being patient and letting them settle in to their new home.
 
Thanks again for your replies guys.

Had a wee breakthrough tonight! The mare didn't follow us to the gate so my riding horse quietly and sensibly came in to be groomed and fed then just as sensibly went back out. She did shreak on him at one point when I started taking him back to the field and he got a bit het up but I was just firm and quiet with him and he relaxed. Even when I put him in the field she didn't come careering over, she just stayed away and finished her dinner :) Yay!!

Next step will be to hack him out without her on Thurs (my next day off work). I'm going to take the advise and just get on and get outta there without looking back. I'll come back after 15 mins and will do the same every day for the rest of the week. Got all my fingers and toes crossed they settle.

Cheers xx
 
My companion horse does that and I have a nappy tb so not fun...

They do settle down whilst you are out. When I get away, I can look back down on the field and I can see that he has settled down and is munching the grass. Just started taking the boy out again just for walks down the road to get them used to being apart again. The noise they make is like I am weaning a foal... but they'll survive!!!

Perseverance is the key!
 
A wee update...

After spending a month seperating them to feed, groom etc, and riding my lad in the field or hacking them out together I finally felt like it was time to hack my lad out on his own. I tacked up, got on, got my neice to go and feed the mare in the field (I don't have stables) and off I set. At first she stood and watched and didn't look too worried. He marched off happily in his usual fashion, then off she went. She came careering over to the fence screaming her head off. I just ignored her and marched on. Off I went down the track, he was tense but kept going. He had a bit of a fit shouting and bouncing and a few attempts to spin round further down the track but I was really firm with him. She was making such a fuss I swear I thought she was going to be beside me any moment. I could still hear her shrieking when I was 15 mins away. I did a loop with my lad and as soon as we were facing home he started... He was bucking, plunging, threatening to rear, trying to b*gger off with me, shouting his head off. All I could think was this is so dangerous and i'll be lucky to get home in one piece (baring in mind he's 17.2hh and I really don't know him yet). So I stayed firm and calm and varied between walk and trot (with lots of lowping about being an idiot thrown in for good measure). By the time I got home I was sweating and dying to get off :) My fiance said the mare was going absolutely mental the whole time I was away.

So i've bitten the bullet and made the call, she's getting picked up asap (she's on loan). She's making things so difficult and winding up my gelding something rotten to the point of it being too dangerous to ride him out without her. I have been offered 2 shetland geldings as a temporary measure to keep him company so i'll see how I get on with them.

I feel like i've given up on her pretty quickly (just over a month) but I know that days can turn to weeks turn to months and before you know it the whole summers gone and I still can't ride my horse!
 
At least you tried and put all the sensible measures in before you tried too. Don't feel bad, it just wasn't meant to be.
 
I'd say you've thrown the towel in pretty quickly - yes. One hack out and it's all over, which is a shame.

As for your boy being a prat on the way home, you should have just turned him back around again and taken him off for an hour or so, and if he still did it - do the same again.

The mare would probably have settled if you'd been consistent.
 
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