Help with wording an advert.

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becksten

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Hi all! Just need a bit of help with how to word an advert for a livery yard. Ive put adverts on a few websites and they've been on for about 3months now, and not had 1 phone call! Maybe ive worded it wrong? Or is it just a quiet time of year? Help please, any ideas welcome!
Thanks x
 
New small and private livery yard in North Gulham. Vacancies for FULL (5/7days) / PREMIERE / SALES PREP / SCHOOLING & BREAKING LIVERY. Friendly, knowledgeable and dedicated owners. All stables are 12x12 and rubber matted, secure tack/rug room, 35 acres of Post and Rail paddocks, 30x60 Menage, Jumping paddock, 4 Horse Walker, Hydrotherapy Pool, Drying off stable, Small gallop around the yard. Owners on site 24/7. Set in beautifull Lincolnshire countryside. Prices start from £75 P/W. Call us to discuss your individual requirements.
 
I'd drop 'small and private' sounds amatuerish
Exclusive, or Small but not private
Assuming full is all care inc exercisng, what is Premier?
WOudl you offer Part? Your price wou be a bargin in commuter-land, but is there that much of a market for Full near to you?

As to sales prep and schooling .breaking- peole will choose ny recommendation, or proof- what erperince .successes?
Sales prep makes me think its a place with loads of new stock in and out, and buyers ina nd out every weekend -which I don't like.
Just have Scholing and breaking- and experience level of staff, any specialisms, - eg comepted to whatever level in any discpilne.?
 
How about something like

Livery yard with Excellent facilities situated near North Gulham, including ~ 35 acres post & rail paddocks, 30x60 Menage, Jumping paddock,rubber matted stables, Hydrotherapy pool and small Gallop. Owners on site.
Current vacancies include Full livery(5-7days) or for Schooling/Breaking/Sales Preparation.
To discuss how we can assist you further, please call......

I don't know where you have advertised, but perhaps this is something else to review too? Have you thought about trying on the local tackshop board, vets or in the back of your farriers van?

You've got some cracking facilities!!
 
As a happy hacker "PREMIERE / SALES PREP / SCHOOLING & BREAKING LIVERY " would put me off as I'd feel unwelcome
crazy.gif
. Of course you may not want happy hackers"!!!!! If you do maybe add something to that effect.
 
Thanks for your help! Apparently, there is a 'shortage' of full livery around that area. Full is excersized 3 times per week and Premier is excersized upto 6 times per week and competing if req. To be honest, This yard will be our 1st proper yard that we've managed/owned, so its still new to us. Thanks!
If anyone wants to pm me to help, that would be great, as there are some issues i dont want to put public.
 
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