Honestly, why is finding a sharer so difficult?

[sidesaddlegirl]

Not an ad as it has nothing to do with my horse but am ranting on behalf of my friend as I have to hear about her search for a sharer woes all the time.

She has a cracking Connemara that will turn it's hoof to anything with the right rider (even went well in my side saddle!!) and would even get to come to shows with us too! So far she has been let down with people disappearing off the face of the planet, being stroppy because they have to pay every 2 months for his front shoes, etc, etc.

She is getting down with it all (I'd take him if he was a hand taller) and just wondered if this is the norm with trying to find a sharer. No one seems to want to take it seriously

 

[Chestnutmare]

Your friend is not alone with this as I am trying to find sharer for my mare but not had a single sniff yet she's a darling of a mare I'm wandering if its time of year?
I am wanting someone couple days to help with her exercise n small contribution I want adults or competent teenagers I'm not sure I will find anyone til weather changes.
I know how your friend feels.

 

[kerrieberry2]

I think a lot of people want something for nothing these days! loaners included! a friend of mine used to ask far too much of her sharers and no wonder she never keeps them!

but also might be the time of year! we are all fed up of mud, hard work and not much time for riding, maybe she will have much more luck finding someone come spring! fingers xd

 

[sidesaddlegirl]

It's been really frustrating for her as she doesn't even mind if it's a novice rider as she would be happy to help them but it's like no one wants to take it seriously or they want her to pay them!

You are probably right about the wrong time of year but then again, it's those who stick it out in the winter that will be the ones who take it seriously in the long run.

 

[sidesaddlegirl]

She only wants £35 every two months for shoes and as long as they pay half the diesel with me, she'll take us both to shows. She'd even pay for them to enter dressage comps as she wants more dressaging done with him. Oh, and they would have to help poo pick, hardly asking a lot but so far she has been getting people who think it's a free pony ride.

I'll tell her to maybe hold off for now and then advertise more in the spring.

 

[webble]

Wow sounds like ride is offering a really good deal. Time of year is def a factor. I had a horse share this time a few years ago she lived out so not much work but the weather was so bad at the start I was riding less than once a week

 

[Wiz201]

I'm the opposite, I would like a share to get into riding, but its finding the right horse in the right area. You haven't said how tall the connemara is, but I'd happily pay £35 every two months and do chores.

 

[Always_A_Moody_Mare]

I had the opposite problem, could not find a horse. My main problem was that the owners would not 'let go' enough, I understand that their horse is precious, but i'm not going to pay school their horse for them + all chores, then for it to go lame all the time.

Your friends horse/the deal sounds fantastic. Have they tried putting adverts into local tack shops? Also to let people know what she is looking for as word of mouth is normally the best way to find the right person.
If I hadn't already found somebody who lets me ride in return for stable duties, it would sound like the kind of thing I would look for, especially with the competing too.

Hope she finds someone soon.

 

[sidesaddlegirl]

I was going to help her draft some ads too. We're going to the tack shop tomorrow to look for a new saddle for him and they have a notice board there too so will draft a quick ad tomorrow too. We've been trying word of mouth but all our horsey friends, already have horses! May ask my OH to keep an ear out at work too.

Wiz201, off-hand he is about 14.2. I'm 5'9" and used to ride him sometimes when I was much lighter (too heavy now ) and even jumped him at shows- and I hate jumping, but on him, I felt safe!

 

[Littlelegs]

Try pc, rc, local comp centres & any decent rs too.

 

[Lippyx]

It's so hard for both sides. I am horseless, and have looked into full loaning ( I've part loaned quite a few horses over the years). There are a few things that stop me though. Cost is first. I cannot believe the amount some people ask for! Their advert goes on about how they don't have the time, and their horse is wasted, but then they want the loaner to pay over £50 a week, for 3-5 days plus half towards Shoeing each month or so, and help with chores... Surely the person loaning is doing them a favour by looking after their horse?. If I could afford that, I could probably afford my own horse. Some owners just won't let go. I loaned one horse whose owner didn't have time for it, but yet every time I was there to ride, she was too!! What about when you do all that hard work bringing a horse on or back into work, and then the owner decides they no longer need your help!

It is tough for loaners. I have decided for me, I would rather buy my own. I've spent too much time, money, love and energy into someone else's horse, for them to drop me!

(obviously not all horse owners are like this, and I hope your friend finds someone suitable soon! x )

 

[Polos]

I had the opposite problem. I got fed up of being messed around by owners when trying to arrange to try the horse. Most of them would disappear of the face of the earth! I later found out (on this forum) that the owners of one of the horses didn't want to loan the horse out anymore but then they changed their mind a week or two later without telling us, which is fair enough but an email or even a text would have been nice to let us know. I ended up buying a horse (I have now ended up with 2!) as I couldn't face dealing with another owner as I have only ever had bad experiences. having my own is much more relaxed and pretty much stress free. Given my experiences I would never look for a share or loan again.

So it could just be that people have had bad experiences like me and just don't want to take the chance.

Have you contacted your local riding club?

 

[sidesaddlegirl]

No, as the two in our area, we know most of the people in them and they already have their own horses. There was only one who didn't have their own horse and unfortunately, that was one of the ones who stropped off after being told that they would have to poo pick and that their non-riding teenage mates wouldn't be allowed to hang out and party at the yard all the time!

It is an excellent idea about RS's though, will tell her that too!!

 

[Antw23uk]

Not an ad as it has nothing to do with my horse but am ranting on behalf of my friend as I have to hear about her search for a sharer woes all the time.

She has a cracking Connemara that will turn it's hoof to anything with the right rider (even went well in my side saddle!!) and would even get to come to shows with us too! So far she has been let down with people disappearing off the face of the planet, being stroppy because they have to pay every 2 months for his front shoes, etc, etc.

She is getting down with it all (I'd take him if he was a hand taller) and just wondered if this is the norm with trying to find a sharer. No one seems to want to take it seriously

Most people want a sharer in winter when the weather is crap, its cold, misserable and it seems not even the owner wants to do there own horse!! ... Sorry i meant they 'don't have enough time!'

So this person is getting soaked, cold and freezing there arss off and expected to pick up someone elses horse ***** AND hardly able to ride because of the weather and then to add insult to injury they are expected to pay as well .... sounds like a great deal to me!

And before people shoot me down i dont share and have my own horse.

Funny how the majority of 'share' wanted ads disapear in the summer!

 

[wingedhorse]

It's so hard for both sides. I am horseless, and have looked into full loaning ( I've part loaned quite a few horses over the years). There are a few things that stop me though. Cost is first. I cannot believe the amount some people ask for! Their advert goes on about how they don't have the time, and their horse is wasted, but then they want the loaner to pay over £50 a week, for 3-5 days plus half towards Shoeing each month or so, and help with chores... Surely the person loaning is doing them a favour by looking after their horse?. If I could afford that, I could probably afford my own horse. Some owners just won't let go. I loaned one horse whose owner didn't have time for it, but yet every time I was there to ride, she was too!! What about when you do all that hard work bringing a horse on or back into work, and then the owner decides they no longer need your help!

It is tough for loaners. I have decided for me, I would rather buy my own. I've spent too much time, money, love and energy into someone else's horse, for them to drop me!

(obviously not all horse owners are like this, and I hope your friend finds someone suitable soon! x )

Where I live the full cost of DIY livery for a horse stabled by night, and in field by day is a LOT more than £50 a week. I would expect a sharer to pay e.g. 3/7 ths of a horses full costs, probably rounded down a bit, for three days of riding and care.

 

[showpony]

Pity not in Ireland as sounds perfect!

 

[Elsiecat]

Sorry i meant they 'don't have enough time!'

So this person is getting soaked, cold and freezing there arss off and expected to pick up someone elses horse ***** AND hardly able to ride because of the weather and then to add insult to injury they are expected to pay as well .... sounds like a great deal to me!

And before people shoot me down i dont share and have my own horse.

Funny how the majority of 'share' wanted ads disapear in the summer!

You're paragraph about the weather and paying confuse me - should they only pay in the summer? We still have bills in Winter? MORE bills! We have to be in the cold and work too, its part of horses and if someone wants to get into it via loaning and sharing then they need to have the experience of the winters to decide if the summers are good enough to make them want their own horse!

Not the same in every scenario about the adverts disappearing in summer also.
I genuinely DON'T have enough time for the horses I have in my care and a part loaner would be perfect. 1 day a week or 7, their choice. They can go to shows, hacks, whatever.
15 pounds a week is all i'm asking for. (And I'm happy with a novice who has their head screwed on! I'm not asking for Zara Phillips here!)

 

[Antw23uk]

You're paragraph about the weather and paying confuse me - should they only pay in the summer? We still have bills in Winter? MORE bills! We have to be in the cold and work too, its part of horses and if someone wants to get into it via loaning and sharing then they need to have the experience of the winters to decide if the summers are good enough to make them want their own horse!

Not the same in every scenario about the adverts disappearing in summer also.
I genuinely DON'T have enough time for the horses I have in my care and a part loaner would be perfect. 1 day a week or 7, their choice. They can go to shows, hacks, whatever.
15 pounds a week is all i'm asking for. (And I'm happy with a novice who has their head screwed on! I'm not asking for Zara Phillips here!)

The sharer wanted ads tend to disapear when the nice weather comes! People seem to find more time when its lovely, bright and dry!

If people dont have enough time or need finacial contribution towards a horse then surely they should be thinking twice about having a horse?

 

[Elsiecat]

The sharer wanted ads tend to disapear when the nice weather comes! People seem to find more time when its lovely, bright and dry!

If people dont have enough time or need finacial contribution towards a horse then surely they should be thinking twice about having a horse?

Exactly the horse I'm looking for a sharer of isn't technically my horse, I didn't buy it or want it. But if I don't care for it no-one will. But I don't have the time too.. (not that thats ANY of your business ). I also can't really afford it, you're right. However 15 pound a week would pay for the hay at least.

 

[Littlelegs]

The sharer I had didn't contribute, but that was my choice, not the sharers right. Basically a teen who's parents change of circumstances meant after years of shares her loan pony went back, & her horsey contact was limited to hanging round her mates horses. I felt sorry for her the day before a show when her friends were prepping & offered her my 14.2 to take & we took it from there. Working ft as the single mum of a baby, the help was needed more than the money. Although her duties were fixed to certain days, she was able to ride pretty much whenever, & do comps & shows. On the understanding that if baby was unwell, she'd do extra days. So I basically got assisted livery for free, my pony exercised & pony able to enjoy herself going out & about. In return, she got a cracking schoolmistress pony who frankly would have been out of her parents budget even before their change of circumstances, one or two free private lessons a week, & the chance to do local shows & comps on a decent pony, for the cost of entry fees. However, if I was looking for a sharer now when I don't need to have emergency back up in place, I would feel quite justified in demanding a % of costs & set days. With my sharer I could also have asked for contribution & used it to pay for services if & when required, but truth of the matter was I felt sorry for her & she was a fab kid who deserved a nice pony to ride & love. And as it happened, only time I asked her to do extra was once for two days. If she'd been from a wealthy home & between ponies, I most certainly would have asked for payment & not felt guilty. Ditto if I'd advertised.

 

[Antw23uk]

Exactly the horse I'm looking for a sharer of isn't technically my horse, I didn't buy it or want it. But if I don't care for it no-one will. But I don't have the time too.. (not that thats ANY of your business ). I also can't really afford it, you're right. However 15 pound a week would pay for the hay at least.

If its not your horse then i suggest you walk away and stop being taken for a mug! ... Not that its any of my bsiness on an open forum!!!

 

[Elsiecat]

If its not your horse then i suggest you walk away and stop being taken for a mug! ... Not that its any of my bsiness on an open forum!!!

If only it was that simple

 

[chessy]

I've been on both sides of the fence! I'm looking for a share horse, but have come across owners who want too much money (don't want "something for nothing" but keeping my own horse was cheaper compared to some of the ads I've seen!) or the horse is unsuitable, or what seems like a perfect share horse but the distance is too far.

I am visiting a potential share at the weekend, the owner isn't fussed about money and knows I can't offer a large contribution as a student, though I will still pay what I am able to. She mainly wants a sharer so she can spend more time with her young children. Hopefully it goes well.

When I owned my own horse, finding a good sharer was difficult, and I only asked a small contribution and did not ask for any money toward shoes. Went through quite a lot of joyriders! Eventually I managed to find someone, she was a novice but really helped me out, and she actually now owns my horse now I've gone to uni. Can't think of a better person to have my horse now.

Good sharers are out there! Your friend is offering a total bargain there! Keep trying

 

[sidesaddlegirl]

My friend is a hard grafter at her yard and would have keep her ponio all to herself if it wasn't for her job hours (she gets up at 4:30 am and gets back home at 6pm) and she wasn't a happy hacker. He just isn't getting ridden enough any more due to the present job she is in and she thinks it's a shame that he's being wasted when when she thought( !!) that there were lots of people who would like to have a cracking pony to ride and show for minimal cost.

They could ride whenever they wanted in the week and by arrangement at the weekends so she could ride too (she is only a happy hacker) and wouldn't mind him being ridden twice in one day as he needs it! Since she doesn't like showing (dressage, jumping or showing), she would like a potential sharer to take him to shows with me! Our two horses travel perfectly together. She has a 4x4 and I have the trailer! Her yard only offers grass livery so no mucking out stables, just poopick a wheel barrow of poo a day (yard owner rules)- that's it!

There is a excellent livery yard down the lane with indoor and outdoor schools that you can hire for cheap in the winter and you can school in the fields in summer.

It would hardly be a summer only thing but a year round commitment as she needs the extra help due to her job. It seems that poor sharers and sharees have ruined it for genuine people who need the extra help and who want to be generous with their ponio.

 

[Spit That Out]

When I was looking to share finding the right horse and owner combo was almost impossible. Either the owner was too clingy and never let you out her sight and went around after you had done the chores and did them again or I didn't see them from one day to the next and even the YO commented that they didn't see them much now I was helping them!
Some people ask too much to share and are basically asking you to pay for their horse in return for a couple if hours riding a week. One woman had her horse on full livery so there were no stable duties to help with, she wanted £45 a week for 2 hours riding. You weren't allowed to hack or jump so basically it was to school her horse!!
I did however share a lovely cob before I bought my own and I paid £15 a week and half the shoe costs every 7 weeks. I had 3 days of my choice where I was in sole charge of him. Great yard facilities, lovely flexible owners and I shared for about 4 years.
I now have my own and I have a girl who shares my boy. I don't charge her anything as its my choice to have a horse However she offers to pay for half his hay bill and the farrier. She goes down mon to fri at nights to ride, skip out, rug up, feed etc I leave her too it and I have never gone down in the morning and something hasn't been done.
There are good and bad sharing experiences on both sides and it's just a case of finding the right partnership for all parties.

 

[Theocat]

She might be getting people who think it's a free pony ride because she isn't charging. Most people charge so a free share might seem suspicious? I'd charge a tenner a week plus poo picking, and nothing extra for shoes. A regular payment might attract some different sorts of people.

 

[Shay]

I think my YO hit it on the head when we were looking for a sharer for my daughter's almost out grown PC Pony. She said "Sharers just don't get it..." And I have to say that has pretty much been my experience.

Now before you all shout at me - I know there are exceptions and I'm sure there are brilliant sharers out there, and horrible owners. But OP - your freind is not alone in finding this difficult.

In a huge generalisation - but based firmly on my experience of tyring to find a sharer - is that they tend not to want the committment that comes with horses. Which is why they are not looking for a loan or part loan. This is particularly true when you're dealing with ponies as it doesn't matter how committed the kids are - you need committed parents too!

A weekly amount would probably help in this case - and there might be a cushion for unexpected costs. Approaching the local PC DC might help - although some PC branches can be a bit odd about ponies on share. One of our local branches (not mine!) won't allow them and insist members either own or full loan thier ponies.

 

[Skib]

I agree that matching share to sharer is very hard.
My previous share was retired - elderly weekday hack - and I have not found another close to home. Most sharers want a horse near where they live and where we live, demand outstrips supply.
London livery costs are high and we sharers expect to pay high for a share. But most horses kept in expensive private livery belong to people wealthy enough not to need a sharer and whose livery includes exercise.
Less wealthy owners trying to cover the high cost of livery via "sharing" may invalidate the insurance. A "share" may turn out to be a horse that has many so-called sharers, with set riding slots and no contract. This amounts to hiring out a horse for which I am told a licence is required. People seem to turn a blind eye. But I cant do that.
Third - a mismatch between owners looking for sharers and people hoping to share. Ads for Surrey, show owners looking for athletic, competitive sharers to exercise and train powerful and aspirational animals. Incongruous for us old, unremarkable riders who would prefer to share because you get more time and more freedom than you do at a riding school.
My experiences mirror those of Spit that Out.

 

[Laura-Maybe-IV]

She only wants £35 every two months for shoes and as long as they pay half the diesel with me, she'll take us both to shows. She'd even pay for them to enter dressage comps as she wants more dressaging done with him. Oh, and they would have to help poo pick, hardly asking a lot but so far she has been getting people who think it's a free pony ride.

I'll tell her to maybe hold off for now and then advertise more in the spring.

What an excellent offer! If I was closer I would've had him! I can't understand why people mess your friend around, and there is hardly any work involved I can't see why people wouldn't snap him up!
I have had nightmare's trying to find a loaner/sharer for my horse I ended up giving up. I was offering 4 days a week including both weekend days, I wanted £25 a week. But that was it. I had a few people try her and she was good, one was a novice and didn't tell me. And the other rode her a few times gave me barely any money, then dissapeared when I said I don't want you to bring your friends to ride her which I didn't think was unreasonable as she isn't a novice ride! It's so difficult to find someone good, but there are sucsess stories out there so fingers crossed!

 

[FinalFurlong]

I have had a horse on full loan (gave up as jumping as frowned upon in the yard and i could not deal with all the dressage, broke my heart as i bloody loved that pony ) and ive been looking out for another one (your deal sounds bloody fab just wish you where nearer!!) so hope i get lucky!!

I saw a local one on preloved, the owner wanted £350 a month for part loan!!!

shocked me as my old one on full loan was 180 a month plus shavings and farrier (no shoes)

Hope you do find a good sharer, along with the bad ones there are also some fabulous dedicated ones out there who dont complain, i never had any troubles with mine!!