Horse pts- friends left behind

poiuytrewq

poiuytrewq

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I've been very lucky in the past that even horses who seemed friends were quite unbothered when we lost one. Maybe a bit looky for a day tops then normality resumed, Pretty fickle creatures sometimes!

I have decided to have one of my horses pts. He's been lame or stiff (alternating, sometimes just looks a bit stiff, others a bit lame, less often pretty lame) Prior to retiring he had a LOT of investigations. We ended up with a probable neck issue, spinal impingment type thing which didnt respond to medicating/physio/rehab so he retired.
He's worsened and I get the impression off him that he isn't happy. His face looks miserable more often than not. My vet had a look at him last week and agreed he had gone downhill, she said It wasn't a clear must be pts but that I'd need to be very careful and keep a close eye and a few other things which made me think it is actually time, or at the very least its not too early, especially as it looks like a wet grassless winter coming up and what fun retired is that.

Anyhow, I've not actually arranged it but I'm happy in my decision, so that's ok.

My worry is my mare, she is only ever turned out with him and although she will leave him she panics if he leaves her or go's out of sight. They have only been together 4/5 months but I'm worried how she is going to cope with suddenly not having him. She can be turned out with my other horse who she knows from passing stable sniff but they don't go out together as a 3 as the boys didnt get on.

Has this ever been a real issue or does they always get over it within 2 minutes as per previous (sadly fairly extensive) experience? It's worrying me quite a lot.
 
If you say your mare can go with your other horse I'd steadily increase the time they are spending together, so when you do decide to PTS they will be used to each other and she wont feel so alone. it sounds like your other boy isn't going to be an issue.
I'd just make sure you let her sniff your boy when he's gone so that she knows - it does help with their processing if close. When my first horse died his pair bond was in the yard with him and she sniffed him all over when he had gone, the other two horses weren't bothered in the slightest. She neighed a little when he was transported away and was a bit clingy for a few days, but at least she did have the two boys with her.
Never nice to have to think about so hugs.
 
I had my two oldest boys pts together last month as they were best field buddies and were both showing signs of arthritis despite medication. There were six horses at home who had all lived out together in a herd since being foals. We took the remaining four horses up to see/sniff the bodies. Three of them were a little bit subdued for a day but one of them did call for three days.

If she gets on with one of the boys I would suggest as windswoo above has and gradually increase her time with the horse that she is familiar with.
 
I agree that I would start trying to introduce another horse to her, the worry being that you don't want to cause an upset to the horse who is due to be pts.

It could be worth getting some calmers in case she is distressed once he has gone. I lost one to colic and although another two horses were still there the mare was beside herself when she was put back out in what had been their normal field, even with a new horse that she had accepted in strip paddocks when introduced. She cantered round and round and round the fence eventually slowing to walking. It was heartbreaking, a calmer really helped (NAF magic was what I used but that was because it was what was available) and within a week she had pretty much stopped.
 
It's unfortunate that the two boys don't get along or i'd say to turn them out all together so she had a new friend already in the making. Is it possible to turn her out with the other horse and her buddy on the other side of a fence? Just so you're only chnaging one thing at once rather than her losing her buddy and having a brand new field companion on the same day.

I just had to have my gelding put down, after 12 years in the same herd (6 total) and very friendly with a couple of the others. I had them all there (other side of the fence) when vet came so he was calm, then let them in with him for an hour afterwards. Vet stuck around for 15 minutes as apparently occasionally you get one that goes a bit hysterical but other than a bit of nuzzling (and theft of the treat he'd dropped when he went down) it was all very calm, no calling or any signs of distress. One seemed to be trying to wake him up then sniffed him all over, the old girl did a drive by sniff then shrugged and went about her business as usual. I left them alone with him after the vet went so I didn't interrupt their natural behaviour and when I came back after a cuppa they'd all moved away to graze.

The last one we had to have put down I did bring her son (19yo, lived with her his whole life) in to see her body, but we were at a rented field then surrounded by footpaths and I was worried kids would show up and see, so he only got a few minutes before the knackers van came. None of the other 3 got time to visit her but they had watched her drop from inside the field with no visible upset. He was ok on the day, but next time I hacked him out to the woods where they'd last ridden together he was in hysterics calling for her and was frothed white by the time we got home the poor guy.
I still have him, and he wasn't upset by my gelding at all despite being pretty good friends for 12 years. I don't know whether more time with his mum would have made a difference or not, unfortunately didn't have the choice.

So, other than the vets mention of occasional hysterics, mine mostly haven't been too upset, although I think letting them see does help.

Really sorry you've had to make this decision, it was similar with my gelding, multiple issues, trucking along ok on painkillers, able to play with the others etc and probably would have continued for at least a year according to vet, but looking a bit miserable when the ground got more difficult and slippery. Wish there had been anything else I could have done for him, but it is what it is and I'm confident I made the choice at the right time.

I hope you can arrange things so it's easy for your mare, and she takes it well.
 
I am going through something very similar with my 16 year old mare. She sounds very much like yours and I suspect it stems from the same sort of thing - neck, spine issue which despite extensive investigations we have not been able to pin down. She's been lame in front for months, though has been a bit better this summer and bute helps. I nearly had her PTS last spring but made it through a bit longer. Like yours, she looks miserable some of the time. The other two happily graze, but she stands by the gate wanting to come in, then when in, she wants to go out. It's so difficult to bring yourself to call it a day when it's not colic or an acute injury. Well done for making the call and I hope that your other one manages without her friend.
 
The two boys did get on until she came along! They have lived together for years with no problem but now i think the one would literally try and kill the other, so i cant turn all 3 out. I also can't leave the one who we are saying goodbye too i his stable and turn the other two out really, He's fine when she is ridden but is always stabled along side the other, he's never without one of them.
Theb other bit to make life awkward is the one that's staying is currently still on box rest but has a week til he can go out.
I can let her roam loose on the yard and properly chat over the door.

@Marigold4 Its a pretty rubbish situation isnt it. The shock of something sudden is horrible but this, on and off. looks horrific one minute then almost bright the next is tough to call. I'm going on the fact that he's worsened more recently than over the past years and if that continues I'll regret not calling it sooner.
 
I do also have the ponies and she has been turned out with them before, they all stayed quite seperate though, the two ponies together and the two bigger horses. She kows them though, just not overly keen on them!
The other gelding is also fine with them as untl his recent box rest was being turned out with them over night (keeping the geldings apart)
 
It doesn't sound like you have a choice of keeping him going, just for her company. And if you can't really pair her up with something else in the interim then you'll just have to work through whatever she throws at you.
It sounds like you have options with the other gelding and ponies to try different combinations.

My herd of 4 was in reality two pairs - by their choice! When we had to cut that down to 3 the one that was closest to the PTS one did go quiet for a few days and the herd dynamic took months to sort out !

I think 4 is an optimal number but given I struggle to ride 2, getting a 4th is a bit mad !!
 
I’d let her see him afterwards so that she knows he’s gone and then deal with whatever from there.

She may surprise you. One of the horses where I am was really pair bonded to a mare that was PTS (like used to get really distressed and shout if she went out of sight, didn’t give a stuff about the 10 other horses he had for company etc). He was surprisingly fine & seemed to understand what had happened & that she was gone and moved on from it very quickly.
 
I had 3 that were inseparable. The other 2 would call constantly if you took one away, couldn't seem to settle.
One of them had to go to horspital for investigation, the other 2 stayed silent as we drove away. I thought that was odd, but I think they knew, he never returned (pts) & it was like they knew & accepted, appeared completely settled straight away. Even became happy to be left alone in the field when the other was ridden.
 
Lamehorses said:
I had 3 that were inseparable. The other 2 would call constantly if you took one away, couldn't seem to settle.
One of them had to go to horspital for investigation, the other 2 stayed silent as we drove away. I thought that was odd, but I think they knew, he never returned (pts) & it was like they knew & accepted
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That's interesting isn't it. They can definitely tell when an old or sick horse is coming to the end of its life. There must've been something about yours that meant they'd picked up on how serious it was, even if you weren't fully aware until the results of the vet investigations.
 
Widgeon said:
That's interesting isn't it. They can definitely tell when an old or sick horse is coming to the end of its life. There must've been something about yours that meant they'd picked up on how serious it was, even if you weren't fully aware until the results of the vet investigations.
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Absolutely, I'm certain they could sense the issues & knew that we were finally sorting ( the horse had been under vet investigations for a couple of weeks).
Turned out he had a huge internal tumour.
 
I've had this recently I had to let my retired horse go who had been a companion to my mare since I have owned her which is 3 years. He was her rock and although she wasnt velcroed to him he was always there for her. I didn't want her around when he was let go as I didn't want her to hear the noise and get stressed with strange happenings as she is very sensitive so she didn't get to see the body. I had bought a pony to keep her company a week before so she wasn't on her own but she got very depressed and wouldn't graze much for a couple of months but thankfully has now settled with the pony. I have had long time companions pts before but not experienced the one left behind being so affected. Unfortunately I was also very upset over losing him so whether she picked up on that I don't know.
 
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