Horses you just click with

[measles]

I'm always fascinated watching new partnerships together and how they develop in their early stages. The "click", the horses way of going and how it matches something a rider can be unaware that they want or need or would benefit from is intriguing.

What brought this to mind was a recent trip to Ireland which instead of sourcing horses was looking for a showjumping schoolmaster for our 8yo son who has been anxious jumping. We tried three ponies, one of whom we discounted immediately, and there was a difference of opinion over the other two. I and my friends who came with us thought that the third pony would best suit my son as the pony was built uphill and had active paces yet was snaffle mouthed. However, B much preferred the second pony who is built downhill and much less comfortable looking.

After much discussion we bought the second pony and we've now had him home 5 days. B has ridden him 4 times for no more than half an hour and, flying in the face of my concerns, he is sitting much taller than he would previously and is jumping confidently after all of two 10 minute sessions popping fences. He and the pony seem to have an almost telepathic understanding and look as though they have been together for years. How is this I want to know..?

Yesterday I saw the same thing happen with a client trying a lovely 5yo horse we have. To say they were both beaming within 20 minutes of work on the flat would be an understatement and clearly there was a connection that rider and horse was aware of. To witness this twice in a week has really got me thinking.

This is B and his new pony with huge grin in evidence. What are your thoughts on similar experiences?

 

[Tangaroo]

I think you are right. I have just bought a lovely ID x TB and after going to see quite a few, some of which i didnt even sit on, as soon as i saw him i liked him and once i got on him i just felt safe and at home.
I have had him nearly 3 months and he can be a cheeky, stuffy bugger at times but i am always smiling when im riding him and even when he does something to try my patience, i cant help but smile.
I hope he will event at BE90 but i like him so much he will be staying whatever
I think sometimes you just click with a horse. It doesnt happen often but when it does you should go with your gut instinct and grab it with both hands.

 

[ellie_e]

Aww great pic!! Both B and pony look like there enjoying each other! Yes know exactly what you mean about 'clicking' the other horse I have which my mum now rides I bought 9years and we never really clicked, he's a great horse bold jumps and is lovely but I never really enjoyed him as much as I do my current horse. I ride Zu and just get him, I enjoy him even when the chips are down he's a pleasure to be around and even if my mum is lunging/grooming him, he'll hear my voice and instantly ignore my mum until he gets a pat off me, we have a great relationship and my horse of a life time.

 

[wench]

If its a nice sane sensible thoroughbred... I like them!

On the flip side it's quite painful to see your own horse you don't get on with too well going much better for someone else!

 

[NR99]

Moose who I have had 15 years I only walked and trotted and bought. Cruise who I bought in the snow, in Scotland would you believe I hope to also have the same long relationship with once he is back in full swing

R feels the same about Pig, some days she can be an absolute witch others angelic (though this really has been levelled with Regumate) but she would not change her for the world

 

[ClassicG&T]

I've had my fell for just under 3 years, we are as thick as theives. We know eachother inside out and i know exactly what the pony is going to do before he does it, we click

Just got my new horsey last week, 4y/o TB x Welsh. We clicked right away. I had tried a few and none made me want to never get off. Then i rode my new on a few weeks ago, and even though he bucked, almost jumped me off and then refused, i loved him. He now follows me in the field, trusts me and i trust him. So far, he has been an absolute chilled out gem

 

[alwaysbroke]

Ah have been waiting to see a pic of the new pony and B they both look so happy together, will look forward to reading the reports on this pair

Years ago I clicked with a lovely horse, I wanted him the people who were selling him wanted me to have him. The instructor I had at the time said no, I have always slightly regretted going against what she said. I have been lucky enough to ride a friends pony for years who I feel as safe as houses on she can read my mind and I love her to bits. OH and I purchased an ex racer nearly 10 yrs ago, I had provisionally 'bought' her in my head the moment the seller told me she was born on the same day as OH's horse of a life time, he was born in Leicester, the mare in Kentucky! went we went to see her the moment we looked at her we nodded to each other and had decided to buy her before even sitting on her. She is fondly known as the Baggage, has given us 2 lovely foals, plenty of memories, and is currently growing old disgracefully teaching the teenage daughters a thing or two.

 

[tigers_eye]

I do think some horses are better built for certain riders too, I know that the cute little mare I rode earlier in the season, Homespun, was one like that, you just felt "right" on her, and everyone I've spoken to who has ridden her says the same. Some horses make people ride better, others are very difficult to ride well!

 

[dafthoss]

Me and the YP clicked as soon as I sat on him. He might have been out of work for a few months and a very very green 5 year old but we got on and despite being advised not to buy him by my friend I did and I'm so glad I did. We get along like an old married couple as in we both know what to do to annoy the other at times but help each other out when needed and we are both equally stubborn .

 

[kerilli]

interesting thread, i'd kind of forgotten about the real 'clicking with' thing... i tend to poo-poo the old 'didn't bond with it' saying, and reckon that if you're a decent enough rider you'll be able to get on with anything you sit on...
but, years and years ago, i went and tried a horse at a rather rough and ready dealer's, and we absolutely clicked, enough that after a few minutes he was really complimenting me (unheard of from him, i swear) and saying "i didn't know you rode that well!" i told him the truth - i usually didn't! that horse and i were just on totally the same wavelength, flat and jumps, from the start.
of course, he failed the vet. c'est la vie.
glad to hear that B is getting on so well with new pony, sounds as if you definitely made the right choice.

 

[only_me]

Pony is gorgeous!

I get what you mean about clicking with horses - I defiantly clicked with billy when I first sat on him - he just felt right.

But then I would say most people would get on bill and be able to ride him, he's not complicated but just remembering that he is 6 can be difficult!

He is the first horse that i sat on thinking this feels right - and his attitude of wanting to work for/with me certainly made it an easy choice

 

[millitiger]

I don't know the reasoning behind it, maybe it is just like with people and there are some you instantly have 'chemistry' with and some will always rub you up the wrong way without ever really doing anything wrong?

I've had Millie and Vinnie from foals and have never intentionally had a favourite but it is very clear now which one is 'my' horse

Vinnie is definitely the horse I have clicked with most out of literally 100's of them.

He isn't an easy horse to ride and has been through a few pro riders (he only lasted 4 days with one!).
I wouldn't profess to say I ride him better than them or that he goes better for me, but we do seem to just click and even on the days he is being difficult, he is still my gorgeous, wonderful Vinnie

Millie, I never really 'meshed' well with and, in hindsight, we struggled on for too long without ever really being on the same wavelength which wasn't good for either of us.
No real reason for it, our personalities just don't work together very well.

 

[KatB]

Yep completely agree. I ended up with madam as we just clicked. I'd tried a couple of other lovely horses who ticked the boxes so to speak, but I just didn't want to go any further with them. I disliked madam in the stable, and she was completely not what I wanted, but as soon as I got on her I knew I wanted her and was buzzing for days! There was one other horse I loved when I tried him, but for whatever reason it wasnt to be. I still see him about and think what if, but I think he is with his match

 

[Dexter]

My new one is a big sharp idiot, who is prone to rearing and general idicoy, he also doesnt hack very well, which is a nightmare as I keep mine on thier own with just 1 livery. However, I LOVE him! I feel safe even when hes doing his ninja moves, which I never thought would happen after a hideous fall which took me over a year to recover from a couple of years back. If it feels right and they make you grin, its right!

 

[seabsicuit2]

I think horses that are naturally light, uphill , naturally balanced, and simply sit you in the right place, will always make you ride better, and sit better over one that doesn't have those attributes. hence why they will make you smile. This is why these horses usually tend to be great competition horses,& why their pro riders look so good on them!
Its not totally black and white but a good horse makes a good rider. You feel bad/negative when you ride an average or rubbish horse.

 

[Nicnac]

How apt that OP posted. After losing my mare in April who I'd had since was 6 months old, I never thought I'd 'click' with another. I have an ex-racehorse who is a pain and I have never really clicked with him - my daughter bought him and I ended up with him (long story). I have been riding him a lot since April, but still no real bond.
I decided to start looking at horses without any real conviction that I would find one. I went alone and saw a few.....(no comments please about not taking anyone with me!); rode a couple and then BANG. Smokey arrived home last Saturday and it's lurve. He's a cheeky 4 year old, green as anything and a gelding whereas I thought I was looking for an older schoolmistress.......
Can't explain it; it just happened.

 

[ihatework]

I very much believe in the 'click' I bought my current and one before last on that basis. I had a horse between those who was a good horse in his own right but I never liked riding him much and didn't 'get' him as a personality. I eventually sold him because of it.

 

[ihatework]

To add, I will now only buy something again if I have that instant connection, not worth the heartache trying to create something that wasn't there in the beginning.

 

[TarrSteps]

Don't you just meet people you like - or don't like - instantly? You might find out or rationalise why you like them later but the initial reaction isn't consciously based in that information.

That said, people notoriously don't always make the best choices in their relationships and it's no different with horses. Some people persist in owning/riding horses that aren't suitable for them because they think somehow that "love" makes up for being able to do right by a horse. Suitability is a different subject - I like my friends but that doesn't mean I expect every one of them to be good at every job. Nor would I want them to be doing jobs for which they are ill suited. If you buy a horse to do a job it'm more like hiring someone -liking them is important, being able to work ŵith them is essential, but they also have to be able to do the task at hand.

Other people (I'd say you fall into this category, OP) are so educated they make good choices often without having to think things through consciously. They just learn to like good horses! Re suitability, would you have let B have a pony that jumped like an arthritic hippo just because he liked it?

I like some horses I don't especially like riding, I like riding some horses I don't necessarily like that much as "people". if I wanted a horse of my very own I would want both, obviously, and yes, it probably would be a case of knowing it when I saw it. Like love.

There are also horses I grow to appreciate or admire as I work with them. I'm not sure I'd want one of those as my own though, either.

I have also known people who are exceptional "matchmakers" - they often know what people want better than the people themselves. Like the human variety they don't force people into relationships they don't want but they can be an objective guiding hand in an emotional situation. Sometimes they've made good matches that looked bad on paper, sometimes they've encouraged someone to look past an initial lukewarm response. Sometimes they just seem to know.

I think one of the marks of a good trainer is they make as many horses as possible easier for other people to like. They bring out the good bits of the horse and smooth off the edges, so other people can see the real, best edition of the horse, not the products of tension/discomfort/misunderstanding. I rode a horse for someone today who rarely sees it go and doesn't think it's that able, and she was genuinely surprised at the moments when he pulled it together - she described the two different "hims" as "Donkey" and "Dressage Diva". Did it make her like him more? No, she already loves him no matter what. But she saw him with new eyes, even though she's had him for years. That shows how important 'first' impressions can be! So once you like a horse it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy, I think, as you expect better. Perhaps horses feel the same way.

 

[Missadelaide]

I know what you mean. When I was looking for Cracker, I was specifically looking for an event mare. I had seen a few, a nice bay mare from Elite Irish Horses, who was lovely but just not my bag. I saw a few from Emerald Equine who were awful, shoes hanging off, terrible conformation etc. Then I rang up about Cracker who was 4 t the time (now 6) and she sounded perfect. I had bought her in my head from the moment I saw her! She was lovely to ride, had a few bucks and a bit of a spook which she still does now but to jump, she was fab, there was something about her I couldn't put my finger on but I still feel it now, 100% trustworthy to jump, she always tries and is always totally committed into a fence. I told the woman there and then I wanted her and haven't looked back.
I think some horses and riders just gel, it's just like people, no rhyme or reason to it, it just is.

 

[measles]

OH and I purchased an ex racer nearly 10 yrs ago, I had provisionally 'bought' her in my head the moment the seller told me she was born on the same day as OH's horse of a life time, he was born in Leicester, the mare in Kentucky! went we went to see her the moment we looked at her we nodded to each other and had decided to buy her before even sitting on her.

The nod. That is just it.

 

[measles]

Thanks. We may have made the right choice but it wasn't the choice my instinct told me to make and I'm struggling with that a bit I must admit as it is what I usually rely on..

 

[TarrSteps]

would you have let B have a pony that jumped like an arthritic hippo just because he liked it?

To clarify, I did not mean you bought him an arthritic hippo just because he liked it, I mean that IF an arthritic hippo had been on offer, you would not have bought it for him as a suitable pony to go on with his jumping simply because he liked it.

Okay? New pony clearly not an arthritic hippo.

 

[Goldenstar]

I have had horses for more than forty years and have experianced that click three times it's odd it's like you know them I have had strong relationships with many other horses where the relationship developed but that click is different ,very special.

 

[GreyCoast]

it wasn't the choice my instinct told me to make and I'm struggling with that a bit I must admit as it is what I usually rely on..

Measles, with all due respect, your instinct probably wasn't wrong, just looking for something different. Correct me if I'm wrong but you normally buy horses that are saleable without the pressure of having to match it to a rider. Riders come to you until the right one clicks with the horse you chose. The pony you chose was probably far more saleable than the one your son picked.

With your older son, you've been a team for a long time so you know him well and can match him easily. He's clearly talented, confident and loves the work (and I believe you said laid-back), so could probably have a good relationship with a horse he doesn't click with. I'm sure if you asked him which horses he clicked with and which he didn't (maybe liked, but didn't feel the earth move) there'd be little difference in his results.

A shaky confidence makes a huge difference in a click and not a click in terms of combined ability and enjoyment.

I've only ever clicked with two horses and both I felt that click on first sight, from a distance. But while very different horses, they have the same root temperament that makes me feel confident. No idea how I could possibly judge that before even touching them. But there you go.

 

[measles]

To clarify, I did not mean you bought him an arthritic hippo just because he liked it, I mean that IF an arthritic hippo had been on offer, you would not have bought it for him as a suitable pony to go on with his jumping simply because he liked it.

Okay? New pony clearly not an arthritic hippo.

I knew just what you meant Trouble is we went more toward arthritic hippo than sports model! I'm being a little unfair to the pony but what I mean is we didn't go on my usual criteria. Which has proven to be fine, if a little weird!

 

[measles]

Measles, with all due respect, your instinct probably wasn't wrong, just looking for something different. Correct me if I'm wrong but you normally buy horses that are saleable without the pressure of having to match it to a rider. Riders come to you until the right one clicks with the horse you chose. The pony you chose was probably far more saleable than the one your son picked.

With your older son, you've been a team for a long time so you know him well and can match him easily. He's clearly talented, confident and loves the work (and I believe you said laid-back), so could probably have a good relationship with a horse he doesn't click with. I'm sure if you asked him which horses he clicked with and which he didn't (maybe liked, but didn't feel the earth move) there'd be little difference in his results.

A shaky confidence makes a huge difference in a click and not a click in terms of combined ability and enjoyment.

I've only ever clicked with two horses and both I felt that click on first sight, from a distance. But while very different horses, they have the same root temperament that makes me feel confident. No idea how I could possibly judge that before even touching them. But there you go.

Wise words, GREYCOAST, and something to mull over at work today

 

[Avonbrook]

The nod. That is just it.

That exactly. When I first saw my old boy as a very raw 6 year old he looked at me and without losing eye contact just raised his nose a little and brought it back down again... 23 years later and retired for the last 3, I've never regretted my choice and that nod is still there.

 

[Sarah1]

Absolutely.
When I was looking for Bailey I tried loads - I was so desperate for my own horse again that I would have ridden anything, and I mean anything, if it wasn't for my sister I'd have probably ended up in hopsital!
Anyway, I tried loads of horses - all very nice animals but there was always 'something' about each one that I couldn't put my finger on - I thought I'd never find one that I really liked and had sort of thought I'd have to compromise, then...along came Baileydoo!
We went to try him - there were 6 of us stood in a tiny dark stable with him, he never flinched, then 3 of us rode him in a tiny school, he never missed a beat, then we saw him in traffic (when I say traffic I mean everything from kids on bikes to articulated lorries!) and he didn't bat an eyelid. He lived at the end of Leeds/Bradford runway so even planes weren't an issue for him. When we returned to the yard the lady walked him throuh the washing hung on the line & he just happily wandered through like it was the most natural thing in the world!
He flew though the vetting and even the vet commented that he'd never met such a nice natured animal.
He's grown into a very big boy & has tested my patience at times but never for 1 second have I ever regretted that trip to Leeds and I'd have bought him even if he'd have been twice the price I could afford!!!!!! In fact when we'd been to see him my sister said if I didn't buy him she was going to buy him for my eldest niece, who wasn't even in the market for a new horse!!!!
We all 'clicked' with him to be honest - everyone that meets him clicks with him!
I knew as soon as I saw him in that stable that I wanted him - something just totally dropped into place - I knew I had found what I'd been searching for!!!!

 

[HotToTrot]

I certainly find that there is an instant click or there's not.

I've just been looking for (and found) a new one. I tried six, all similar age, price range, level of experience. One I couldn't ride for toffee - really, it was embarassing - one I fell off(!!) and two I clicked with.

In amongst all this searching and analysing, my unhorsey, pragmatic husband told me (isn't it funny how the unhorsey are so wise!): "It's a horse, you can't apply cold hard logic to horses, so go with your heart not your head." I think, all things being equal and barring the horse having something dreadfully wrong with it, that's probably not a bad approach to take.