Hovis_and_SidsMum
Well-Known Member
Dear Diary
I am sorry for writing a bit later today but its taken until now to persuade mum to let me have the laptop. Thanks to that high stepping river dancing pansy of a supposed friend of mine I am SO in trouble. So much trouble that mum says Santa Paws isnt going to visit because he only comes to good ponies.
So this week had been ok. Last week Billy didnt come out for a hack so mum and I went for a little stroll alone. It went ok despite a minor misunderstanding between mother and I about the evasive manoeuvres one should undertake upon spotting a snake. Or indeed a pile of baling twine as it transpired to be......
Ive worked pretty well for mum this week, some semi decent schooling and some very well behaved lunging so all in all I was pretty confident that Santa paws would be visiting and perhaps bringing me one of those really nice sticky lick things that I love so much.
The one minor blot on the landscape had been Hot Stepper biting my face too hard during a game of we are stallions over the fence and removing a chunk of hair. I thought it made me look manly mother said it makes me look like I have mange.
So in summary we had a fairly happy mum, a small piece of missing hair and a Destroyer in the good books. Good times. Then yesterday it all changed......
Now to explain this more clearly I must transgress a little and explain the way our yard works: We all have two fields a summer and a winter field although we do swap between them more regularly if the grass is not so good (or if Ive eaten it all....). However since Hot Stepper arrived things have changed a little. We still have our own summer fields but we share three winter fields between him and me. This is due to the fact no one else will baby sit the high prancing buffoon. So we have two smaller ones, and my old winter field to use between us for winter. The two smaller fields are properly fenced off but my old winter field has a proper boundary and then electric fencing down the middle to keep us apart. So I have Hot Stepper on one side and then Dolly in her winter field on the other side of me. You with me so far?
So yesterday for reasons that do alarm me when I think about them for too long Hot Stepper decided to take out the electric fence poles, drop the electric fencing to the floor, step over it and come and play with me. Admittedly we were having a pretty good time until I spotted mums black car coming down the drive. Thinking quickly I leapt in front of the highly bred bozo and hid him from view. Mum drove past and for one split second I thought wed got away with it. Alas mother is not easily fooled and the next thing shes storming down the drive yelling at us both. I quickly rushed to her to give her big cuddles hoping that the equine Michael Flatley would hot foot it back over his side of the fence and we could pretend the whole thing had been some figment of mums imagination. But no. He stood goofily whickering hello to my mum, clearly not registering the murder in her eyes.......
I was summarily dragged back to the stables where she proceeded to check my legs for damage whilst suggesting what my parentage might be and how short my life might be cut short if Id hurt myself. Hot Stepper was then dragged out of my bit of the field, put back in his, the fencing reinstated and his legs and body inspected too. I dont know why. The only thing cut up was the grass from where wed been practising sliding stops.
I can assure you that no amount of cuddling nor behaving on the lunge last night has so far put a dent in mums frostiness. I think this is grossly unfair as it was clearly idiot faces fault and not mine so why am I being blamed as well? Life is so unfair. If Santa Paws visits him and not me I shall be lodging a complaint with the Elves Union.
So I am in the dog house, Hot Stepper is in the dog house, Dolly thinks I prefer geldings, my grass has been cut up to ribbons, Santa paws might not be coming, its raining heavily, Im wet and all in all Im not happy. Merry blinking Christmas............... BAH HUMBUG!!!
I am sorry for writing a bit later today but its taken until now to persuade mum to let me have the laptop. Thanks to that high stepping river dancing pansy of a supposed friend of mine I am SO in trouble. So much trouble that mum says Santa Paws isnt going to visit because he only comes to good ponies.
So this week had been ok. Last week Billy didnt come out for a hack so mum and I went for a little stroll alone. It went ok despite a minor misunderstanding between mother and I about the evasive manoeuvres one should undertake upon spotting a snake. Or indeed a pile of baling twine as it transpired to be......
Ive worked pretty well for mum this week, some semi decent schooling and some very well behaved lunging so all in all I was pretty confident that Santa paws would be visiting and perhaps bringing me one of those really nice sticky lick things that I love so much.
The one minor blot on the landscape had been Hot Stepper biting my face too hard during a game of we are stallions over the fence and removing a chunk of hair. I thought it made me look manly mother said it makes me look like I have mange.
So in summary we had a fairly happy mum, a small piece of missing hair and a Destroyer in the good books. Good times. Then yesterday it all changed......
Now to explain this more clearly I must transgress a little and explain the way our yard works: We all have two fields a summer and a winter field although we do swap between them more regularly if the grass is not so good (or if Ive eaten it all....). However since Hot Stepper arrived things have changed a little. We still have our own summer fields but we share three winter fields between him and me. This is due to the fact no one else will baby sit the high prancing buffoon. So we have two smaller ones, and my old winter field to use between us for winter. The two smaller fields are properly fenced off but my old winter field has a proper boundary and then electric fencing down the middle to keep us apart. So I have Hot Stepper on one side and then Dolly in her winter field on the other side of me. You with me so far?
So yesterday for reasons that do alarm me when I think about them for too long Hot Stepper decided to take out the electric fence poles, drop the electric fencing to the floor, step over it and come and play with me. Admittedly we were having a pretty good time until I spotted mums black car coming down the drive. Thinking quickly I leapt in front of the highly bred bozo and hid him from view. Mum drove past and for one split second I thought wed got away with it. Alas mother is not easily fooled and the next thing shes storming down the drive yelling at us both. I quickly rushed to her to give her big cuddles hoping that the equine Michael Flatley would hot foot it back over his side of the fence and we could pretend the whole thing had been some figment of mums imagination. But no. He stood goofily whickering hello to my mum, clearly not registering the murder in her eyes.......
I was summarily dragged back to the stables where she proceeded to check my legs for damage whilst suggesting what my parentage might be and how short my life might be cut short if Id hurt myself. Hot Stepper was then dragged out of my bit of the field, put back in his, the fencing reinstated and his legs and body inspected too. I dont know why. The only thing cut up was the grass from where wed been practising sliding stops.
I can assure you that no amount of cuddling nor behaving on the lunge last night has so far put a dent in mums frostiness. I think this is grossly unfair as it was clearly idiot faces fault and not mine so why am I being blamed as well? Life is so unfair. If Santa Paws visits him and not me I shall be lodging a complaint with the Elves Union.
So I am in the dog house, Hot Stepper is in the dog house, Dolly thinks I prefer geldings, my grass has been cut up to ribbons, Santa paws might not be coming, its raining heavily, Im wet and all in all Im not happy. Merry blinking Christmas............... BAH HUMBUG!!!
I am sure Santa Paws will come to you as you have been a very good boy with the lovely sales of your book. 
