Hovis_and_SidsMum
Well-Known Member
Dear diary
I have had a mixed week in some ways I have had great fun, in others I have been traumatised and violated beyond words.
Get comfy and I will explain .
On Saturday morning mum, Dad and grandma arrived and loaded fancy pants and I onto the lorry. I was a little dubious about this as it was raining quite a lot, but under the assumption my mother knows what she is doing, I ambled onto the lorry quite happily.
We arrived at evil Army mans house and brother dearest was tacked up and went off to the ménage. As it was still drizzling with rain I happily stood on the lorry eating my hay and generally mooching. I also sniggered as fancy pants had to do a flat work lesson whereas mum had promised me some jumping yippee! However the sniggering came too early as when it was my turn to go out the heavens opened and the rain decided to attack me sideways not just from above. Evil Army man did say I did the most impressive half pass hes ever seen from a big horse a half what? All I knew is that I couldnt even see where we were going. Even the Evil one himself took pity on me and allowed mum and I to go and stand under his barn til the worst of the rain passed. We then did some jumping! He was mean to mum, told her to grow a set and we did a little course in canter (she usually wusses and jumps in trot). From the way she was breathing I think mum really enjoyed herself well I know I did! Why her legs were shaking so much she had to hang onto me when she got off I have NO idea. It was hardly like we were doing puissance although I do fancy that too. Mum is funny sometimes.
After my exertions on Saturday mum let me have Sunday off which was cool and then she went back to Scotland. Thats when it happened .. The final proof my brother is a big poof and the most traumatic experience a young boy can imagine ..
It all started off so innocently we were playing in the field, larking about when all of a sudden he, well he he man mated with me! I have never been so shocked in all my life. For a second I thought I was imaging things but no! The dude was giving me some full on man love. Now Im a willing to try anything kind of a guy (see pictures from last Christmas of me sporting antlers if you dont believe me) but seriously this was awful. Needless to say a swift kick removed him and he tried to pass off the whole thing as a bit of fun. FUN! For who? I have enough issues with the ladies without them seeing that little performance. Since then he hasnt tried it again but I have started grazing with my bum to the fence. Hey Id rather get voltage up my bottom than a Pride surprise again. I think the dude has issues. I mean Im all for a game of Im a stallion but the whole point is were BOTH stallions. Not him be the stallion and me be his conquest. Eeeuuuuwwwwwwwww. So so so wrong.
Anyway yesterday I went out for a lovely hack with Dad and Aunty Sarah in the sunshine. I did keep a wary eye open for both tractors and Pride launching a rear guard action again but all was fine. We had a lovely canter but Im not liking this new canter up the only hill in the area malarkey. Why cant be walk up and canter back down? So much easier I feel. The downside to our lovely hack was I appeared to have robbed the local area of all the sticky buds and hidden them in my feathers. Quite when that happened I have no idea but mum seriously needs to learn to handle those bad boys a little bit better my feathers now look like I have mange. So I can thus suggest that my chances of pulling at my new home are something akin to zilch I have a gay brother who screams like a girl when Im not there and doesnt seem to understand that man love is wrong, mum has pulled my mane so I look like a basin head and now I have manky feathers. Life at time sucks ..
I have had a mixed week in some ways I have had great fun, in others I have been traumatised and violated beyond words.
Get comfy and I will explain .
On Saturday morning mum, Dad and grandma arrived and loaded fancy pants and I onto the lorry. I was a little dubious about this as it was raining quite a lot, but under the assumption my mother knows what she is doing, I ambled onto the lorry quite happily.
We arrived at evil Army mans house and brother dearest was tacked up and went off to the ménage. As it was still drizzling with rain I happily stood on the lorry eating my hay and generally mooching. I also sniggered as fancy pants had to do a flat work lesson whereas mum had promised me some jumping yippee! However the sniggering came too early as when it was my turn to go out the heavens opened and the rain decided to attack me sideways not just from above. Evil Army man did say I did the most impressive half pass hes ever seen from a big horse a half what? All I knew is that I couldnt even see where we were going. Even the Evil one himself took pity on me and allowed mum and I to go and stand under his barn til the worst of the rain passed. We then did some jumping! He was mean to mum, told her to grow a set and we did a little course in canter (she usually wusses and jumps in trot). From the way she was breathing I think mum really enjoyed herself well I know I did! Why her legs were shaking so much she had to hang onto me when she got off I have NO idea. It was hardly like we were doing puissance although I do fancy that too. Mum is funny sometimes.
After my exertions on Saturday mum let me have Sunday off which was cool and then she went back to Scotland. Thats when it happened .. The final proof my brother is a big poof and the most traumatic experience a young boy can imagine ..
It all started off so innocently we were playing in the field, larking about when all of a sudden he, well he he man mated with me! I have never been so shocked in all my life. For a second I thought I was imaging things but no! The dude was giving me some full on man love. Now Im a willing to try anything kind of a guy (see pictures from last Christmas of me sporting antlers if you dont believe me) but seriously this was awful. Needless to say a swift kick removed him and he tried to pass off the whole thing as a bit of fun. FUN! For who? I have enough issues with the ladies without them seeing that little performance. Since then he hasnt tried it again but I have started grazing with my bum to the fence. Hey Id rather get voltage up my bottom than a Pride surprise again. I think the dude has issues. I mean Im all for a game of Im a stallion but the whole point is were BOTH stallions. Not him be the stallion and me be his conquest. Eeeuuuuwwwwwwwww. So so so wrong.
Anyway yesterday I went out for a lovely hack with Dad and Aunty Sarah in the sunshine. I did keep a wary eye open for both tractors and Pride launching a rear guard action again but all was fine. We had a lovely canter but Im not liking this new canter up the only hill in the area malarkey. Why cant be walk up and canter back down? So much easier I feel. The downside to our lovely hack was I appeared to have robbed the local area of all the sticky buds and hidden them in my feathers. Quite when that happened I have no idea but mum seriously needs to learn to handle those bad boys a little bit better my feathers now look like I have mange. So I can thus suggest that my chances of pulling at my new home are something akin to zilch I have a gay brother who screams like a girl when Im not there and doesnt seem to understand that man love is wrong, mum has pulled my mane so I look like a basin head and now I have manky feathers. Life at time sucks ..
my mum hates it when you go into a jump too fast too. Think they must just be wimps tho. I always maintain that I know better tho, and one or two knocked poles later mum lets me do it myself (until I get it wrong then she says I told you So.
xx