Hovis_and_SidsMum
Well-Known Member
Dear Diary
Can you see the news banner at the top of the forum page? Thats about me that is. As mum will have revealed yesterday my new book is out and will be hitting doormats across the country soon - well as long as you've bought it, I'm not giving them away for free! As I told you all last week once again I have shown my charitable side and given every last bean of profit to starving ponies and abused horses. I need to get myself a new agent - I would have at least thought a few million, a movie deal and some serious merchandise could have been negoiated? My mother is pants......
Anyway this week it has once again been scorching hot but despite this and an epic hangover I still had aunty Sammie thrashing me aorund the roads sans wingman all weekend. I hasten to add the hangover was Aunty Sammies not mine - mum doesnt allow me beer despite the German needle man telling mum i should have some every day. Shes such a spoil sport
By monday it was so hot though that even Aunt Sam wilted and gave me the night off. Mum has bought me a new fly sheet so the most strenous thing i did all day was try that on for size. Tough day was monday...........
Wednesday though the weather was deemed a little cooler and Aunt sam, Dolly, her mum and I went out for a lovely romantic stroll. Well it was romantic until we were set upon by a rat with attitude. I was all for stamping on the nipping, snarling little broom head on legs but Aunt Sam wouldnt let me. Dollys mum was yelling all sorts of rude things to the house it had escaped from but no one came to get the pesky little thing under control. So despite me offering to flick it back over the garden wall with the aid of my hoof Aunt sam got off and went to find its owners. I did breifly entertain the idea of seeing if i moved suddenly if i could pull Dollys mum out of the saddle (she was holding my reins) but decided life would not be worth living so stood rock still. Eventually the idiotic owners of the vertically challenged fur ball came and retrieved it but without a word of apology for ruining my romantic evening with my bird. Charming.
Seriously though since the new girl arrived and so obviously adores me, Dolly has been all over me like a rash. I'm not complaining - its great!
So all in all i have been pretty much in the good books with everyone until I went out to the field this morning a little too enthusiastically. Mum let me off and I showed dolly my ballet moves - up and spin andextend rear legs and spring up and........... you get the idea. Then mid darcy Busell impression I nearly stood on one of those big legged, big eared fur balls who try to eat my grass so for good measure I chased it out of my field. Mother was last seen muttering about special needs horses who think they are gun dogs. I am confused? I dont need a gun - i have Destroyer feet!
I understand that its some big important thing this weekend so everyone has four days off work. Well thanks your majesty - i now have four days bootcamp with Aunt sam to look forward to accompanied by a very "fresh" Hot Stepper who's had two weeks off. That'll be him wetting himself if a worm farts in the next county then..... Fab. God Save the Queen? God save me from that queen i can tell you.......
Laters.......
Can you see the news banner at the top of the forum page? Thats about me that is. As mum will have revealed yesterday my new book is out and will be hitting doormats across the country soon - well as long as you've bought it, I'm not giving them away for free! As I told you all last week once again I have shown my charitable side and given every last bean of profit to starving ponies and abused horses. I need to get myself a new agent - I would have at least thought a few million, a movie deal and some serious merchandise could have been negoiated? My mother is pants......
Anyway this week it has once again been scorching hot but despite this and an epic hangover I still had aunty Sammie thrashing me aorund the roads sans wingman all weekend. I hasten to add the hangover was Aunty Sammies not mine - mum doesnt allow me beer despite the German needle man telling mum i should have some every day. Shes such a spoil sport
By monday it was so hot though that even Aunt Sam wilted and gave me the night off. Mum has bought me a new fly sheet so the most strenous thing i did all day was try that on for size. Tough day was monday...........
Wednesday though the weather was deemed a little cooler and Aunt sam, Dolly, her mum and I went out for a lovely romantic stroll. Well it was romantic until we were set upon by a rat with attitude. I was all for stamping on the nipping, snarling little broom head on legs but Aunt Sam wouldnt let me. Dollys mum was yelling all sorts of rude things to the house it had escaped from but no one came to get the pesky little thing under control. So despite me offering to flick it back over the garden wall with the aid of my hoof Aunt sam got off and went to find its owners. I did breifly entertain the idea of seeing if i moved suddenly if i could pull Dollys mum out of the saddle (she was holding my reins) but decided life would not be worth living so stood rock still. Eventually the idiotic owners of the vertically challenged fur ball came and retrieved it but without a word of apology for ruining my romantic evening with my bird. Charming.
Seriously though since the new girl arrived and so obviously adores me, Dolly has been all over me like a rash. I'm not complaining - its great!
So all in all i have been pretty much in the good books with everyone until I went out to the field this morning a little too enthusiastically. Mum let me off and I showed dolly my ballet moves - up and spin andextend rear legs and spring up and........... you get the idea. Then mid darcy Busell impression I nearly stood on one of those big legged, big eared fur balls who try to eat my grass so for good measure I chased it out of my field. Mother was last seen muttering about special needs horses who think they are gun dogs. I am confused? I dont need a gun - i have Destroyer feet!
I understand that its some big important thing this weekend so everyone has four days off work. Well thanks your majesty - i now have four days bootcamp with Aunt sam to look forward to accompanied by a very "fresh" Hot Stepper who's had two weeks off. That'll be him wetting himself if a worm farts in the next county then..... Fab. God Save the Queen? God save me from that queen i can tell you.......
Laters.......
