How can i keep myself moving forward

[Horsekaren]

So we are two weeks into official retirement, Strawberry is happy and i have become a slave.
He has had the HBV out who has suggested i do some pole work with him on the ground and i am in the process of teaching strawberry target training in the hope that i can hold a stick with a ball on the end and he can follow the ball at liberty. Its going well and is currently keeping me sane in my slave duties.
cue ball on stick photo -


I don't think i have ridden properly now since September and it is getting me down, especially as now i know i don't have the hope that my Strawberry will come right. But i feel really sad that all my hard work trying to be a better rider has ground to a halt.

I'm just really looking for ideas on how i can keep it up.

Ideally i would love to buy another but ive spent so much money on him i now have 4k debt to clear. I would love to find a full loan to come and live with us but they just dont seem to exist, especially for someone that's not wanting a competition horse or hack.
I have thought about a part loan 1 -2 days a week including a lesson but as i still need to sort Strawberry every day and work full time my time will be a struggle. There are a couple of ridden horses (i say ridden, i mean they have been broken and not done much else) on my yard that the owners have really kindly said i can ride but i imagine they are probably to green, although one is said to be a plod and has only been ridden i'd say 8 times ever and is 4... probably not the best match.

It makes me sad to think of going back to a riding school as thats where i started and didnt learn much. it inspired me to get my own in which case i realized i hadn't really learnt anything at the school. so the thought of bumbling around with a load of teenagers doesn't appeal to me. I want to continue to learn properly as it really all was coming together.

Besides a lottery win i'm really not sure what the answer is.
I would add as i came back to horses in my late 20's and have always been on small yards i dont have a crowd of people with suitable horses around me.
I wish i was a bit shorter so i could open the world of ponies up, i feel like im looking for a unicorn ( i have a unicorn) i basically want to clone him or turn my ball on a stick into a magic wand which would make him better.


Is there anything im missing?

 

[Annagain]

I think I'd give the horses you've been offered a try - with supervision at first. I think you have a supportive trainer to help you, don't you? You've proved how open you are to learning and how ready you are to listen so with the right support I don't think you'd get into too much trouble! It's not like buying one that you'd have to sell on if it all goes wrong, if it doesn't work you can just say thank you very much and move on and if they're not doing anything at the moment, anything you do will be good.

 

[ihatework]

I’d try riding school again. But not a rubbish one. Private weekly sessions at somewhere like Contessa (I think that might be do-able for your location) would be a valuable investment for the future

 

[nikicb]

It's not surprising you are feeling rather low as you've spent so long trying to get Strawberry right, and now all your hopes have been taken away. If you can afford to keep a horse, but not buy one, have a look at rehoming one from a charity - then you've always got the option to give it back if your circumstances change. And take care of yourself as well, it's been a tough time for you. xx

 

[Michen]

I really feel for you and really respect you for keeping strawberry at the expense of being able to have a rideable horse. Lots of people wouldn’t (indeed I wouldn’t have for some of the horses I’ve had- but would for my current).
Would you consider sending strawberry on retirement livery somewhere that may be cheaper and also less time consuming, allowing you to get another horse on loan perhaps (they are out there) or take on a committee share (equally out there- my sharer pays 50 a month for unlimited riding of a superb horse).

 

[Dyllymoo]

I feel for you, I went through this as well. I would suggest a riding school, but a different one if at all possible. I had a few lessons recently at one near me and it was fantastic. It allowed me to really focus on my position and how to ask even basics that I kind of didn't really think of as Daisy and I would just get on with it (whilst I would hold on for dear life hoping she wouldn't deck me - she had a lot of medical issues we later found out).

Maybe see about the horses you have been offered to ride, but if it was me, I would be careful as you don't want to knock your confidence on something that isn't even your own.

There are loans out there that don't require you to do any jobs, and I know there are lots of people around our way that advertise for people to hack out their horses which would be nice.

Chin up xx

 

[Hormonal Filly]

I also feel for you and was going to say the same as @Michen

Would you consider sending strawberry on retirement livery somewhere that may be cheaper and also less time consuming, allowing you to get another horse on loan perhaps (they are out there) or take on a committee share (equally out there- my sharer pays 50 a month for unlimited riding of a superb horse).

 

[Afon_34]

Horsekaren where are you? & what size & what are you looking to do with said Loan?

 

[Starzaan]

I really feel for you and admire you for keeping strawberry and doing some new work and training with him.

My suggestion would be to send him to a lovely retirement yard where he can have a happy life, and free up some time for you to get back into riding.

I am also sad to see you feel you didn’t learn anything at a riding school. I was a riding school instructor for many years and would be heartbroken to hear a client felt like that. I think maybe you would do best to look for a better riding school. If you would like to pm me your location I’m sure I could recommend somewhere or would know someone who can. Same goes for the retirement livery. I have used one and it was fabulous.

 

[Horsekaren]

Strawberry costs me very little to keep, in summer he can cost as little at £70.00 a month as my rent is so cheap and his insurance is going to be reduced. It costs me £12.00 a week to hay him and his buddy in winter. I rent a stable on the yard for £80.00 so i can use the facilities and be part of the action but thats not really needed. His grass livery is £10.00 a week so i dont think i could beat it. Plus i would absolutely miss him to much if i didn't see him every day. With his condition i also want to be keeping a close eye on how he is doing.

Anna- I am tempted by the offer and i do have a trainer but the same trainer when this horse went to visit didnt think she was ready and was basically a bomb waiting to explode... to then be told she is a plod it makes me wonder if she is bubbling away waiting for the explosion.

IHW- i have had a nose but if i was to have one lesson a week i am looking about £100.00 a week taking petrol into account. Its just too expensive.

Niki- I did think about a rehoming type situation as the actual keeping cost would be fine, its the initial outlay i dont have. unfortunately every thing seems to be a companion or to small, or young and too small.
I'm about 5ft 8, 10stone on a good day 11 stone on a bad day. I dont like high horses as its far to fall but i do like cobby types with a bit of stockyness to them. In fact i love cobs! i think they are incredible, it seems so do a lot of people so they seem hard to come by.

Stazaan- I am really sad to say that, i thought i was great but as soon as i sat on my Strawberry who was advertised as a novice type i quickly realized id learned nothing. Up down up down and canter ect but non of the actuall nitty gritty and feel. I'm in south essex

Lol maybe i will try and sprinkle some glitter on my ball on a stick to see if that creates a bit of magic and cures wobblers

 

[tristar]

i would keep him near, the companionship of of nice horse is not to be underestimated, giving and receiving of affection on both sides, and the comfort of being able to observe and monitor his condition would be easier and might give you more peace of mind.

its midwinter so all is a little on the dull side, but in a couple of months with longer warmer days and spring on the way things could turn around, opportunities to ride will surely appear and you will have had time to come to terms with the loss of strawberry as a riding horse, but it all takes time, look after yourself x

 

[Carrottom]

Is there a local riding club you could join to meet more horsey people? It might be a way to find someone who wants a sensible person to help with their horses, just on a friendly basis.

 

[Pinkvboots]

I am sorry I must have missed that he had to be retired it is incredibly hard when they just break at a young age I know how it feels been through it myself, if you fancy having a ride on one of my Arabs your quite welcome, they can be a bit testing but there safe and really good fun, I am in Hertfordshire drop me a message if you're up for it.

 

[SEL]

As we head into summer you'll have more daylight and more time. Might be worth popping something on a local FB page to see if anyone has a sensible cob they want riding a few times a week. If you explain what has happened and that you'd like to have lessons with your instructor then I reckon you'd get people interested.

I'm currently dealing with my lack of riding badly too. I was having regular lessons while Sick Note was off work, but her latest vet visit has cost at least 6 lessons so grounded again.

 

[LaurenBay]

When I retired my mare, I felt lost! I went back to lessons and really enjoyed them and then I found a share 2-3 days a week, which gave me my riding fix. Unfortunately I lost my Horse, but I am still sharing the same share Horse.

 

[canteron]

Lots of good ideas - I am sure you are so lovely that if you keep looking the right loan horse will come, but in the meantime this is an opportunity to ride lots of different horses and try different things and learn from that. With Strawberry you could always try some trick training (I think Connection Training have a new book out) Strawberry can be your guinea pig to perfect your training technique! My old retired horse, I taught to laugh at bad jokes - it impressed people much more than the rosettes!!

 

[Winters100]

How very sad for you. But you know if you keep an open mind something will come up. There was a recent post by someone who did not have time to adequately exercise her horses, maybe you could ask around locally if anyone needs help exercising in exchange for help with stable duties. I really wish you good luck in finding something suitable and fun - and I am sure that it will come along - hopefully sooner rather than later.

 

[BlackRider]

Definitely try s few of the more charities, Im sure some of their ridden ones are rehomed without being advertised.

 

[SatansLittleHelper]

I've just had a quick look on Preloved and there are quite a few cob loans in Essex, take a look

https://www.preloved.co.uk/search?k...rtType=forloan&advertiserType=&promotionType=

I also wanted to say what an incredibly lucky boy Strawberry is to have the good fortune of you as his slave. I very much admire what you've done for him and wish him a happy, well loved retirement xx

 

[J&S]

Opportunities do arise! When my little coloured mare had to be retired I was pretty devastated, I had owned and ridden horses/ponies all my adult life (and of course child hood) and for a couple of months I just took up every offer I was lucky enough to be given. Quite by chance one evening we went to a very non horsey social event and an old RC team mate came to greet me. I had a little moan about "no horse to ride" and it turned out she had the job of fittening up a horse for the owner of where she liveried her own horse. Why didn't I ride it out instead of her leading it she suggested. So owners, who just happened to be an old PC family from when we had children in the same club, agreed heartily with this idea, and hey presto I had the ride on probably the best horse in the area, a local legend it turned out! That was very nearly 4 years ago and we are still hacking out together and he has now turned his very able hand to arena Trec and added it to his list of abilities.
You have put much effort into extending your riding capabilities and I am sure some one will recommend you, just keep on reaching out into your local horsey community.

I hasten to add that I do still give daily attention to the retired mare and her companion, we pootle round the lanes together when the weather is nice and they are happy to do pony rides for children/grand children. Give your Strawberry time to himself and take your own riding forward, you have years ahead of you.

 

[doodle]

I also couldn’t send a horse away on retirement and I would miss him too much.
Join your local riding club and volunteer to help at lessons, shows etc. Put the word out you are looking for something to ride. There are always horses out there for whatever reason. Mention to you farrier also. Also contact charities direct and explain the situation as they might have something suitable not advertised.

 

[TheHairyOne]

Ive not really had much to offer to yiur previous posts, but I am.so sorry how its worked out for you and Strawberry.

In your shoes I'd try the horses at your yard, but would do some work with them on the floor before thinking about getting on. If they have basically had nothing done with them then some regular work might just settle them down. If not nothing lost.

Good luck.

 

[Trouper]

Definitely try s few of the more charities, Im sure some of their ridden ones are rehomed without being advertised.

Do try the charities, especially if you like cobs. I am sure you know all the main ones but there is also Hopton Re-hab and Re-homing who have a specialist niche in re-homing horses who have a useful life ahead of them which their owners sadly could not fulfil.

 

[Pearlsasinger]

I would accept the offers on your yard to start with, get an instructor to help you get started with them and see how it goes. If either you or the RI think it's not a good idea after a couple or so sessions, you won't have lost anything.

And you have Strawberry to spend time with every day. I wish you both a long and happy retirement for him.

 

[Horsekaren]

Well, i went for a lessons/ assessment at a riding school 30 mins from me. Nice enough place, i was fully expecting a pony to come which was to small and i was to heavy for like my very local school and as i was waiting at the mounting block out came this 17'3 black gelding, he was lovely. I was told he was grumpy on the ground but lovely to ride... reminded me of someone.
I told the instructor id been working on riding with a contact and getting my horse moving correctly, lateral work and my seat. I was told this horse will not work in an outline but there are 2 out of 30 plus horses that can.
Walk was fine, trot was really good, i was able to slow him and speed him up with my rising (good position, and controlled for never having ridden a tall horse). Canter was ok but i know i tense up, mainly because i dont know the horse and get scared). All in all it was a nice experience but i don't think i am going to learn much. As this horse was trotting, when i went to prepare to ask for a downward transition all i did was think about taking a breath and he stopped which i didn't expect so flew forward (down wards transitions have always been hard for us) its always been prepare, prepare, prepare ... not just think about it and it happens.... perhaps that is normal and its been so hard because of Strawberrys wobblers.

To have a lesson a week will cost be about £55 including petrol. I wondering whether that will really be a waste of money. Can riding schools really only teach you so much?
How can you progress when the horses are ridden by so many different people and rarely asked to work correctly.

I love riding, but i'm not wanting a jolly. I want to keep pushing to get better.

Possibly going to view a part loan on the weekend, sounds promising but a bit nervous in case im not good enough for it, plus not sure if i can fit everything in time wise.
Are there benefits of loaning over going to a riding school, to me it just seems impossible to school a riding school horse well when they are ridden so inconsistently.

 

[blitznbobs]

Where do you live?

 

[Dyllymoo]

Its good you went and tried but if you don't feel like its the right place then don't go but it was an assessment lesson so you aren't ever really going to "learn" much in that one session. Maybe its just not the right place for you though, are there any others locally? I had a few weeks off over summer and did a bootfair and sold a lot of things and then used that money to have 2-3 lessons a week over a 6 week period. It really helped me as I find only riding once a week not enough.

Re: loaning there are people out there that want others to hack their horses or just ride as they don't have time, have you looked for one of those so you wouldn't necessarily be asked to do any jobs and that would mean you wouldn't feel too stretched?

You could always look at going to a schoolmaster type place for lessons? They definitely teach you so much.

 

[Tarragon]

I think that one of the benefits of a riding school is the opportunity to ride many different horses. This might be worth considering.

 

[SEL]

I have to confess to getting quite a kick out of getting RS horses to go properly! (or at least better). I am particular about which riding schools / instructors I go to though and focusing on my position and straightness means that when Sick Note is back in work at least one of us won't be too wonky.

I do agree it is nowhere near as much of a buzz as working and achieving with your own horse, but it is also a bit of a relief for me to be riding and schooling without worrying that every mis-step is yet another lameness / vet bill issue

Sometimes it is a case of finding the right RS to work on what you want to achieve.

 

[Horsekaren]

I think i had the horse going as nicely as i could, they said he will walk around with his head in the clouds but id got him stretching down in walk which they said he doesnt do so that was nice. I guess it goes back to trying to learn feel, i need something that is schooled and can work with me, so i can know when ive got it spot on.
I did think it was great to ride something completely not my cup of tea, it made me realised even more how much i love cobby types

I am based in Essex.

I'll keep having a look for loans or rides only. As for a school master, i would love that but i worry they are aimed at people that are a lot more advanced.


PS i know i sound like a utter Brat! First world problems, girl cant ride her pony :/ waaa