how do you get your confidence back?

[china]

iv started to think enough is enough. i used to thoroughly enjoy jumping, was the only thing i ever wanted to do! me and prince were jumping 3ft3 round fantastic, but then he started stopping at fillers, now i have a serious issue with fillers!! moved yards last year with an arena and did some jumping, took him showjumping and did 2ft6 got him around all the fillers! fantastic, then he stopped at a plain oxer and i went flying landing on my coxics! big ouch, got back on and he jumped it then i went around the course again (was clear round) couldnt do the class as i couldnt sit in the saddle lol. anyhow, i havnt rely jumped him since, i have poped a cross pole every now and then but not much more, i just dont feel up to it and this has been for about 8 months, my YO jumps him for me and we registered him with bsja and he has jumped absolutley everything with her. not one stop! but i dont like the way he goes, he is very hold hold hold, go go go. i rather a nice steady rythem and no real change in pace its just looks tidier. but how do i get that trust back? its not just jumping him its any horse really. we compete prelim/novice dressage succesfully but i would like to do a few ode's this summer but ovb this involves jumping. sorry its ended up so long but just abit down in the dumps, doesnt help he might be going in for x-rays in six weeks but thats a seperate issue. am i always going to be like this or is there light at the end of the tunnel. im only 18 so should be the gutsy rider lol.

 

[Sol]

You say 'im only 18 so should be the gutsy rider' but I'm 16 and my confidence went out the window a while ago!

Possibly something to do with schooling too many crazy horses but that's another story

You said you don't like the look of his jumping style? This is something I can relate too right now tbh. My last mare could jump anything but I found her jump quite 'pingy' and in all honesty the whole thing used to be over so fast I'd either stayed on or I'd suddenly find myself on the deck not knowing what the hell happened! So although I always trusted her ability, it was never a comfortable experience.
New horse I find a LOT easier to sit to, ride to a fence, feel what he's doing etc. so although he's not really an easier ride, it feels nicer! So my confidence is slowly rising So I'd say it would be well worth a try having some lessons on a well schooled jumper with a good instructor, or even just being allowed to play around on the horse on your own, and feel comfortable. May also be worth having your horse schooled for a while, this also helped with the mare I mentioned, so she jumped in a style I was happier with! (slower, judged distances better)

Other than that, take it slowly and lots of lessons! Good luck Hope that wasn't all random waffle...

 

[JoG]

Definately light at the end of the tunnel!! I think we all loose some nerve as we get older as we are more aware of our own safety/mortality but that just means we take more calculated risks

Find a really good instructor, who specialises in jumping and have a few lessons, or join a group in a clinic. Tell them everything you've just said and have them talk you over the fence. Am sure once you get back into it you will have the same enjoyment of it and you can have him going the way you want, plus you may find that you develop a slightly more defensive seat so should he slam on the anchor then you can stay in the saddle (or at worse, halfway up his neck and not the other side of the fence!!)

 

[ester]

If you are anything like me the longer you dont do it for the worst I get.

Having fell off twice in quick succesion in the summer, both with injuries, the second with a broken arm it has taken me a while to get back in to it and as we dont have an arena we are limited with opportunities at home. But I have just popped a pole when we got back from a hack etc and also manged to jump a few low rails out hunting which really helped as I knew he def wouldnt stop then!

We managed to get round to having a lesson 3 weeks ago and we were both not great, and very sticky and not really up for it.
had a second today and different story he was great and we he is like that he fills you with confidence. I am hoping we will be ok now!

just need to make the effort to take him out competing but winter SJ does drive me a bit mad!

 

[Jay89]

I too hate jumping, it terrifies me!!

However I have found a really good and encouraging instructior.

Who can point out where you going wrong and encourage you to get over the fences!!

So my advice would be find yourself a jumping instructor.

 

[bushbaby28]

I would recommend having some lessons on a jumping school master to get confidence in your ability back. It sounds like he isn't the most confidence giving horse and right now you just need a little help to get you back to where you were.

Its great you have your YO jumping him as hopefully they can conitnue to school him a bit for you so that when you are ready to start jumping on him again he should be bit better behaved.

Keep going, its totally normal to lose your confidence after a few falls but you'll get it back in time, have faith

 

[phoebeast]

sory to hear about your situation, i know exactly how you feel, i went through a good few years of jumping nightmares recently.

perhaps you need to go back to square one and not pressure yourself into jumping, as i did. find a way to enjoy riding again! go hacking, have a few flatwork lessons, this should help you to see how much you already know! then, when you're ready, start with pole work and then build up the jumps slowly and if you're not ready, don't force it. it might be a case however that you remember how good a rider you are! there are some confidence issues you can ride through but others do take a fair bit of work. there's no point in trying to force it.