How do you stop yourself from beating yourself up?

[Jenko109]

Yesterday evening I took my whippet to the local field. We have only ever had pleasant experiences there with well mannered dogs.

So he was minding his own business, having a sniff in the grass, when a black shepherd ran over and stopped a few feet away. He glanced at it and then carried on with his sniffing, making it clear that he was not interested in engaging.

The shepherd decided to ignore his clear communication that he wasnt interested and instead bowled over, frightening him and causing him to run away. He did a loop of the field with the shepherd chasing him, whimpering a bit where he was scared.

I called him back to me and got his lead on and left.

He walked home fine. He was jolly greeting the other dogs on his return home and has been seemingly not affected by it long term, but I still feel so awful for putting him in the situation in the first place.

Hes booked in for an obedience class in the week, just to make sure that it hasnt knocked his confidence too much.

We also had an episode when he was maybe 11 months old. I took him canoeing. The area where the canoeing is, is not the nicest of areas. We had taken a break from the canoe and were walking along a street next to a pub, when an off lead XL bully ran straight over to us. He was very submissive and put himself straight on his back. The dog returned to its owner fairly quickly but even now, while he is rising 2, I still feel awful for taking him to that type of area.

We wont be going to either of those places again. We walk on the forest around 4 times a week in the very early morning (4.30am this morning), have a walk on the forest once a week with friends in a low dog dense area and the remainder of the days will either be in the private field where the horses are kept or around our local roads.

It just isn't worth it. The stress induced by dealing with other people and their animals is enough to put me in an early grave, I swear it.

 

[Christmascinnamoncookie]

Listen, you didn’t put him in that position, the other idiot owners did. Don’t beat yourself up, it wasn’t your fault either time. Does he have any doggy pals to walk with to boost his confidence?

When Zak was attacked, I entirely blamed the owner, who let go of the lead. Hated him ever since, not helped by him being the next door neighbour’s (grown up) son who would then bring his horrible dog round to his mum’s, which of course really upset Zak and the others and meant I had to keep them out of the garden.

 

[Jenko109]

Thank you

Yes. He has a couple of friends who we usually walk with once a week.

We have not seen them through the school holidays, however will be picking up again with them soon.

I think it's just that 'what if?' feeling.

I dont know how people manage with children. Having a dog is an emotional rollercoaster enough as it is

 

[SaddlePsych'D]

Short answer is 'I don't' - interestingly timed post because I am doing exactly that today! Today it's misjudging the morning heat, not having a car with working air con so that we can get out of the neighbourhood we live in which is pretty much one of those types of area you describe. 'Don't worry he's friendly' was annoying but manageable when we lived in the land of mainly labradors, spaniels and doodle variations of those, now it's a different thing all together.

I agree with CT though, it doesn't sound like you did anything wrong. It sounds like a horribly stressful situation for you both but it was good he was able to listen and come back to you so you could get him out of there.

Other people and their dogs is one of the worst parts of having a dog I think. Not that there aren't lots of nice dogs and owners to meet, it's just they are sparsely sprinkled among varying degrees of annoying/dangerous ones.

 

[lizziebell]

As a fellow whippet owner I know how it feels. They are a super sensitive breed and they have completely different reactions and body language to non-sighthounds which can cause stressful interactions with other dogs. Been there, got the T-shirt and still feel guilty… I tend to be on high alert when ever we see other dogs out walking (luckily we don’t have to walk in busy dog areas a lot).

 

[oldandgold]

Maybe you should ask yourself where was the owner of the shepherd, you or your dog did nothing wrong and I don't think there was anything you could have done to avoid it.

Many years ago my dad had a springer who was minding her own business in the field opposite their house (dad was with her obviously) when she was attacked by another dog, bearing in mind she was
very well trained fear took over and she legged it home, crossing a fairly busy road. There was nothing he could have done, luckily no lasting problems but it shook my dad up no end to think that he couldn't stop the attack or stop her running off.

I will admit that I am now overcautious with other dogs approaching mine especially dogs that I haven't seen before, and always call her to heel.

 

[CorvusCorax]

It's why I am so anal about letting my dogs interact with others. German Shepherds are generally dicks in terms of social interactions, they can often be OTT. I cringe when I see a bunch of them at the dog park, bullying each other, as I walk past with my....German Shepherd.

My young one had some bad experiences in her youth and is quite spiky as a result - there was literally no way I could have stopped a spaniel jumping into my garden and chasing her. So tonight the weather was nice and there were loads of people about so she got a quick blast on the green and I'm going to take her on a proper leg stretch now when it's quieter and cooler.

 

[skinnydipper]

It is absolutely not your fault Jenko.

Our lives are more pleasant and less stressful since I changed where we walk in order to avoid ignorant owners and their dogs. She still gets 2 walks a day but in areas where we are less likely to meet off lead dogs.

5 days a week I hire a dog field, different one each day. I play with her, she gets a good run and we have fun with our amateur scent work and trying out the agility equipment, agility peeps would be horrified as I am sure we break all the rules

I feel bad that she doesn't get to play with other dogs now but she had indicated that her patience was wearing thin with the pushy bullying dogs so I took action to change things before it all ended in tears.


ETA. She seems happy and relaxed and enjoys our new routine.

 

[skinnydipper]

I was thinking about this thread this morning.

I was wondering if any of the thick as pig shit owners will read it and think 'Yep, that's me. I let my dog harass and intimidate other dogs'. So, if you are reading it thicko, buck your ideas up and stop being a thoughtless, selfish prat.

 

[Xmasha]

It’s not your fault at all .
We hadn’t taken Wallace out for walks for quite a few years due to his failing health . So now I’ve started taking Stirling out I’ve been amazed at the change . So many dogs off lead in areas that stipulate they should be on the lead . So many ‘ he’s friendly can he meet yours ‘ then turns nasty and tries to bite . I’m fed up with all the idiots out there .
We tend to go early for our walks to avoid them now , plus he’s got a rottie friend that he plays with off the lead at a local dog hire place .
I know very little about dogs , but you sound like a very caring owner and I’m sure your lad will be fine

Skinnydipper the scent training sounds right up Stirlings street . Can you offer any tips / advice on that ?

 

[skinnydipper]

I’m in no way an expert and probably do things all wrong for proper scent work. Before we started going to the fields it was a game we played at home.

I have some balls that I store in a bag with a star anise. I hide them round the house and garden and she has to find them and when she indicates she has found them, she gets a treat.

When I hide food I started with toilet rolls or kitchen rolls with a treat inside and ends tucked in which she could find and open and get the treats herself, now I use a Kong ballistic hide and treat and a Busy Buddy rip'n tug barbell which she has to find and open.

At the fields I just use treats for her to find, in the grass and on equipment. Being the treat driven dog she is, she is unlikely to leave any treats but I watch her to make sure she finds them in case anyone following us has a dog with allergies.

There are others on here who can give you better advice, for us its just a game where she uses her nose.

Have fun

ETA. You might be able to find a trainer locally who offers scent training or man trailing.