How honest are you with your husband/partner with what you spend

debsey1

debsey1

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My horse is on DIY and my partner(bless him) gives me £100 towards my livery thinking that is all I have to pay!! I pay the rest, usually another £40 - £60 depending on how much haylege, miscanthus, wormer etc I use. Sometimes I feel awful because I can't be truthful to him on how much it really costs me a month.

This month so far it's been £159 for livery, £25 for trim, £45 for dentist, £30 for bath because of show earlier in month plus another £20 for the classes I entered and £20 for a lesson which was done cheap for me!

My partner has not got a clue and would have a fit if I told him.....thats why I tell white lies;) and sometimes big fat ones! How many of you do this? Just as well I have my own bank account but I have to be careful and hide my statements and he always wonders I never have any spare money :( Oh woe!
 
I never tell my boyfriend how much i spend and what on when i do he has a moan....he'd go mad if he knew everything haha.........Im lucky at the moment the horses are out and the fields are my mums OH's so thats free just feed for the ''allergy prone one'' and shoes, worming and jabs. i dont tell him how much it is to go eventing :-/ oh and we went to new york in january and i lost my ray ban sunglasses whilst there so i bought some more when i got back and havent told him haha also i ordered a laptop last week and he was the one who signed for it, i'd forgotten to tell him that i had bought it.
 
He's not daft, he knows what things cost when it comes to horses so there is no way I could possibly be eco with the truth I'm afriad! :D
 
Completly honest as they are both of ours. He spends more than me probably, he has expensive taste too!!! its all we spend our money on really.
 
Lets just say a little economical with the truth ... OH just cannot understand why so many nice saddle cloths are needed
 
I dont tell him every thing but then he dont ask!!

I pay my money up to me how I spend it, I do try and have some left each month to treat family to a meal, cinema

Also my daughter has a pony so he understands that she has less treats
 
ThePinkPony said:
My OH would be far more upset if i was lying to him. As would I vice versa.
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Mine would be far more upset if he found out what i spend...

We're in the process of getting our first house and a mortgage at the moment- So, will i tell him iv just bought the most fantastic dressage saddle and new heavy weight combos for next winter in matching colours for both my boys...?? :o

I think not :rolleyes:
 
He knows what I pay for livery and transport...

The rest, well, he's aware it's not cheap...but I never lie to him or fudge the truth if he asks what such and such costs.
 
lubuzz said:
Mine would be far more upset if he found out what i spend...

We're in the process of getting our first house and a mortgage at the moment- So, will i tell him iv just bought the most fantastic dressage saddle and new heavy weight combos for next winter in matching colours for both my boys...?? :o

I think not :rolleyes:
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lol lol I am exactly the same 'what they don't know won't hurt them'

Anyway, he is into his golf which, is not cheap!
 
Given as his horse lives on the same yard, they eat very similar feeds, and our farriers cost the same, I think he is more than aware what they cost!!!

Also, as we have 4 between us, we are never going to be rich!
 
still dont really understand, but every relationship to its own.

mine is allergic to horses and doesnt like anything bigger than him so horses arent his thing, but they make me ecstatic and he want me to be happy, im very lucky :).

Though today i did have to explain the difference between a headcollar and a cavesson and why I need them both, bless him.
 
DragonSlayer said:
^^^This^^^

I couldn't bear to lie to him about what stuff costs, he is horsey too, and knows full well the cost of things.

I don't understand how a relationship could work if you can't be honest, but thats just me.
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I'll tell you why and maybe this is my problem;

My partner is non horsey thats why I can pull the wool over his eyes, secondly, by being truthful I'll be getting so much grief it would take the pleasure out of owning my boy and thirdly; I see that it is no different to somebody buying a new dress and either hiding the receipt or saying it cost less than it says on the label.

Having said all of the above the relationship does work and 'thats just me' ;)
 
I dont lie he just doesn't ask, he knows they are expensive but not sure he knows just how much I spend, I earn my own money so it wouldn't be an issue if he was to ask. He does know that mine costs more than others and wonders outloud why I cant have one that lives off grass and doesn't injure its self lol.
 
debsey1 said:
I'll tell you why and maybe this is my problem;

My partner is non horsey thats why I can pull the wool over his eyes, secondly, by being truthful I'll be getting so much grief it would take the pleasure out of owning my boy and thirdly; I see that it is no different to somebody buying a new dress and either hiding the receipt or saying it cost less than it says on the label.

Having said all of the above the relationship does work and 'thats just me' ;)
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Never done that with clothes either....! just never seen the point...

But if it works, then it's fine!

:D
 
99% truthful. I think he knows more about my finances than me about his. Our money is separate, as long as we have enough for our joint expenses we don't pry.

I don't have a horse or children though, it'll change when I do!
 
I know exactly what you mean!

My OH is non horsey in every sense of the word and paying x,y,z gives him the hump for that day/night.

If I told him my horse spooked while out hacking he is saying horses are dangerous and I shouldn't be riding and to give up - Yeah cheers, really supportive...!

My life is a lot easier and more pleasant if he doesn't know. It works for me :D
 
I pay for my own so don't lie, he doesn't understand why I spend more on mine than he does on both of his. Well she has needs and is spoilt.
 
I'm totally open and happy to discuss all my expenses with my OH, and he often helps me, but not my parents! They'd have kittens if they knew what I pay for livery, what a bale of haylage costs, and what I spend on things like Rambo rugs! They come from an era when the cost of keeping horses (especially as they had the farm) wasn't a lot, and kit lasted a lifetime or it was repaired.
 
I tell my OH the truth because I'd hate him to lie to me so I don't lie to him. He has never stopped me spending money on my horses/lessons/anything at all and I love him for his easy going attitude :) We both work hard and our money is in a joint account, no his and hers for us. I realise that everyone does things differently though so I guess it comes down to whatever works for you :)
 
ThePinkPony said:
Completely honest... always.

Why lie? I really cant understand it.
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Ditto this 100%.

They are my horses and I pay for them so why on earth would I need to lie to my partner about how much money I am spending?

As long as I pay my half of our domestic bills, he isn't interested in where the rest my money goes and vice versa.
 
Lie, lie, lie: "I got it in a sale", "It was a deal/bargin" "I would loose money if I didn't buy it" "but he really needs another .... " etc etc etc....
If he knew....

And the sad thing is, it is all my own money, he probably doesn't care, I think I lie to hide it from myself as much as him... he he...
 
Completely honest too. I earn my money and he earns his. We each pay half of the bills and spend the rest as we choose. He doesn't mind how much I spend on my horse, likewise, I don't ever question him about what he spends his money on. Suits us great and life is simple!
 
Helbert said:
Lie, lie, lie: "I got it in a sale", "It was a deal/bargin" "I would loose money if I didn't buy it" "but he really needs another .... " etc etc etc....
If he knew....

And the sad thing is, it is all my own money, he probably doesn't care, I think I lie to hide it from myself as much as him... he he...
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You've hit the nail on the head!! lol
 
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