How long until I stop bursting into tears occasionally, because I miss my cat??

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redmone

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God I miss her so much. Some of you might remember that I had to have her put to sleep almost 6 months ago now. She was an old girl, 16, but still so playful and lovely. I was there when she was born and there when she died. And I loved her so much.

I just wondered when I'll stop randomly bursting into tears when I remember her or things she did.

Sorry everyone, I feel a bit silly sat here crying and typing this. :(

RIP Toppy. I miss you.

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Cats become very special parts of your lives. I cant even think about my two now I dont have them with me, take time to remember what a lovely girl she was and the happy times you had together, cry when you need to xxxx
 
I don't know but I still randomly cry at things when I remember Boots and it is four months since I had to have him put down. One of the most ridiculous things I have cried at is when one of the yard cats killed a rat...I cried coz the lazy cats wouldn't kill them all winter and one of the rats bit Boots leading to his illness! Very irrational I know but nobody ever said grief was rational!
 
I should think you should smile at the things she did rather than cry,not much of an epitath :( just remember the good times and make her life worthwhile :)
 
Thanks for the hugs. Definately needed.

It's so damn hard isn't it.

I want to remember her and talk about her and smile, but I can't cause it makes me cry.

We took in a rescue cat after we lost Toppy and she's made it easier, but I just miss her so much.

I'm not a "girly girl" and to be honest, I doubt 99% of people of know me would believe that I get upset over her. I don't come across as the emotional type!

Just sometimes creeps up on you doesn't it. x
 
amage said:
I don't know but I still randomly cry at things when I remember Boots and it is four months since I had to have him put down. One of the most ridiculous things I have cried at is when one of the yard cats killed a rat...I cried coz the lazy cats wouldn't kill them all winter and one of the rats bit Boots leading to his illness! Very irrational I know but nobody ever said grief was rational!
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Awww bless Boots. How long did you have him?

x
 
I am not sure if and when it stops. If I think too much about when I had my old boy of 18 had pts 3yrs ago i get very sad, we had him since a kitten and he was the most wonderful cat. I try to move on with my thoughts otherwise I do get bogged down with the sadness of losing him.
I have a 19yr old who is happy but on borrowed time, gosh its tough.
All I can say after my ramblings is it does get easier, but you never forget the wonderful little creatures *big hugs*
 
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Moggy in Manolos said:
I am not sure if and when it stops. If I think too much about when I had my old boy of 18 had pts 3yrs ago i get very sad, we had him since a kitten and he was the most wonderful cat. I try to move on with my thoughts otherwise I do get bogged down with the sadness of losing him.
I have a 19yr old who is happy but on borrowed time, gosh its tough.
All I can say after my ramblings is it does get easier, but you never forget the wonderful little creatures *big hugs*
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It is tough isn't it. Makes you wonder why we do it, but then again, I think we all know why - they just bring so much happiness to our lives don't they.

My Toppy was on borrowed time too. Eyes had gone, kidneys not good, coat was terrible. She'd never been a "looker" :rolleyes: but she was beautiful to me. And what a little killer too! She was a tiny cat - looked like a kitten until she was about 14 and her health started going downhill. But she once brought in a dead magpie!!!

I contemplated making her a "house cat" and before I'd decided it was time to do that, she was ran over by a car. She badly broke her front leg, and into her chest area (collar/breast bone?) but still dragged herself all the way down the drive, through the catflap and onto the kitchen chair. I came home and found her there, meowing at me and covered in blood. Had her to the vets and gone in an hour.

Not the way I thought she'd go, but not a surprise that it wasn't quiet and peaceful. She wasn't that sort of cat.

Sorry. I'm rambling now. I could talk forever about her.

RIP your "old boy" and keep that 19 yr old plodding on! What a good old age :)
 
Geraldine said:
My lovely Suzie Pie Cat left us almost 3 years ago. I still burst into tears when I'm in the garden where she is buried (I'm welling up now!!).

(((hugs)))

xxx
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I'm sorry. RIP Suzie Pie.

Three years and you're still the same. I guess I'd better get used to it.

We had Toppy cremated alone, and her ashes and collar are in a box on top of my TV (can't miss them!). I was looking at ornaments to put them in and that's what set me off again.

The rescue cat is lovely, well not lovely, more of a monster actually. Serious behavioural problems (in that it snuggles and licks you, then tries to rip your face off!!!). Seriously, if it was a dog it would long ago have been.....well you can guess!!! When we picked her up from the cat home, OH picked her up in his arms and she leapt at him and bit his lip. They offered us others, but no way Midnight was going to find a home. She'd been returned twice before. So she came home with us and here she stays. She's getting better. And we're getting used to being bit!!!

She makes me happy. Toppy would have hated her!:p
 
Awww redmone (((hugs)))

Pets just become such a huge part of our lives....when I lost my rats, I didn't sleep for weeks and spent most of my nights crying as I couldn't hear them running round the cage, playing with each other!

Its difficult but it does get easier...easier to remember the good times and the fun you had with them and be able to talk about them with a smile, but you'll never forget her.

R.I.P Toppy xx
 
Aw....I still cry (hard as well) and have palpitations when i think of my lovely Max. He had a terrible start in life - when i saw him for sale on preloved, he was six months old and a matting, stinking, crusty-eyed persian mess. He had been mistreated and generally unloved, topped off with suffering from calicivirus, which his "owner" decided not to treat...I absolutely adored him - he even used to come out with me in the car (in his basket in the front seat with the car roof down and the wind blowing through his whiskers). Anyway...I made him all better and he was the happiest little fella ever until 2009 he suddenly got poorly and was diagnosed with lymphoma - he was only 2 1/2. I nursed him through his chemo for a year - he lost his tail hair and his whiskers and was skin and bones - but would still purr and give me a lick as soon as I walked up to him.

After a year, he he made a remarkable recovery - running around and playing again and eating like a horse! That lasted two weeks until a terrible relapse and then I knew his time had come...that was a year ago and I'll never stop crying about it - it was awful - in fact I am crying now! I feel so guilty wondering if it was something I fed him or did to him in those better two weeks.

I have two more now and love them dearly but he was utterly irreplacable (he's the fluffy ginger in my photo album). His ashes are under my bed, so he doesn't get left out at night time.
I even bought him back from the vet after he was pts as I didn't want him stay there in the dark overnight on his own - he had been there too many times. And then I took him the next day to a nice animal crem. I am sure the vet thought i was a mentalist.

I'm smiling now thinking of him - definitley very irrational!!
Sorry waffling on but chin up - you're not alone (you've def made me feel more normal anyway!) xxx
 
I still have tears in my eyes when I talk about my cat Inky who got run over 3 years ago however at the time I cried myself to sleep for several weeks! Just try and remember all the funny and happy moments. The song "have a little patience" is my favourite memory as I had just collected him from the airport after his flight vack from the US and that was playing as he was miaowing so very apt!
Very sadly, my cat Millie was diagnosed yesterday with a tumour in her mouth which is very likely to be malignant. We have been advised that is likely to have spread and surgery is not a good option especially as she is a real stress head. We have made the decision to keep her comfortable with pain relief for the next few weeks while she is still eating and going out and I am dreading making the descision to end her suffering! Lots more tears to come!
Remember that saying "it is better to have loved than not to have loved"! Thinking of you and of others who have lost their very much loved pets!
 
Hugs to you ((((HUGS))))
My dear Poppy has been gone a few years now but I still get a catch in my throat when I think of her - she was almost 19yrs old and I'd found her wild on a farm at about 4wks. She had gummed up eyes and was a sorry mess. She grew into the most gorgeeous cat with attitude - I loved her unconditionally. I think of the fun times and smile that I had the chance to love her. I remember the times when she brought us all a mouse to play with - all fouor of them running around the living room! And the time when she pounced on a blackbird and missed then with great dignity that only cats can do walked through the lounge with 'You didn't see that did you' look on her face despite the black feather hanging out the corner of her mouth.
This is her doing her Sphinx impersonation
Poppy.jpg


I now have Catastrophe or Astro who is currently asleep on my forearms between me and the keyboard making it extremely hard to type
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KellysHeroes said:
Awww redmone (((hugs)))

Pets just become such a huge part of our lives....when I lost my rats, I didn't sleep for weeks and spent most of my nights crying as I couldn't hear them running round the cage, playing with each other!
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Awww, this made me so melancholy, I was exactly the same when my last rattie went (and I still find the film 'Ratatouille' makes me cry cos it reminds me of them).

Exactly the same with our (many) cats, we never had less than two at home when I was growing up and thinking of any of them now still brings a tear to my eye. We had two cats go in under a month last year. One was expected, he was 15 and had in the past year 'got old', had gone from being a creature of, ahem, noble bulk to skeletal, so although it was sad when he went it wasn't entirely unexpected. The second was unexpected; he was 12 so not young but not ancient either, and unlike our other cats, which had always been 'family' cats he was very definitely mine, from the day he was born (we still have his mum!). Even after I permanently moved out from my parents to do PhD he still seemed to know when I would be coming home for weekend visits and would be waiting in the drive for me. He used to follow me round the house like a dog and then plump himself wherever I sat down.

Mum had thought he'd been a bit under the weather, took him to the vets who, during exploratory surgery, found he was riddled with tumours, so they decided it was kinder not to wake him up. :( It still kills me I didn't get to say goodbye. The day after I took the mare out for hack on my own and pretty much cried the whole time (glad it was the middle of a week day, cos anyone who met us woud've thought I was barmy), except when we cantered, then I let her go faster and faster until the wind swept my tears away and it felt like if we could just go fast enough I could leave my grief behind.

Sometimes I think of bereavement (because even if its 'just' a pet that's what it is) as tearing a hole in your heart; when it it first happens the tear is jagged and it catches and hurts. Eventually time smooths away the rough edges until you can look back down and remember the best memories without getting caught.

Hugs Redmone, it'll get better (I would say hug your new Kitty, but that sounds like it may end in a trip to A&E!)
 
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Cats are just ace. I have just the two now, Katie Pie Cat (is Suzie Pie Cat's sister) she is 15 this year and Billie Cat (Suzie Pie Cat's daughter) and she is 13 this year.

I keep saying I won't replace them when they leave but we all know that actually, I will, as the house will be empty without some fluff balls purring on your knee!
 
I think that when they are taken from us without warning it is harder to deal with than when we make the final decision for them.

I had a lovely Cocker Spaniel - Pepper - who I loved so much - and he was run over in the farm driveway next door to my home he was almost 3yrs old. It still really hurts and I think of him often - it hurts more than when my other dogs have lived a full life and have been ready to go.

Same for Catastrophes sister Catalyst - she was poisoned by Antifreeze - courtesy of a nasty cat hating neighbour. I miss her too - she was only just 2 yrs old and a real character.

All my pets have been loved and mourned, even the pet mice - most are buried in my back garden and even though I've considered subdividing my place I can't bear the thought of them being dug up to lay pipes or something. I've planted tree roses over their graves - my favourite flowers.
 
Redmone I hope all these lovely stories of other people gorgeous much loved cats give you some joy at a very sad time. They have me. I say again, cats are very special xx
 
KellysHeroes said:
Awww redmone (((hugs)))

Pets just become such a huge part of our lives....when I lost my rats, I didn't sleep for weeks and spent most of my nights crying as I couldn't hear them running round the cage, playing with each other!

Its difficult but it does get easier...easier to remember the good times and the fun you had with them and be able to talk about them with a smile, but you'll never forget her.

R.I.P Toppy xx
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Hi KH!

Well I came back on here this morning, and thought "no one else will have commented, but I'll check anyway" and I've had such a lovely few minutes this morning reading all these stories.

We lost our gerbils a while ago. One went so suddenly and well before his time, leaving just one in the cage, which was heartbreaking. I expected him to go shortly after (assuming they were older than we were told) but he lasted over a year on his own. Then one day he died too, and it was very strange not having that little scratching and rustling sound around.

I feel better this morning. God, it's just so hard sometimes isn't it (without sounding melodramatic!).

Thanks for the hugs x x x
 
"...I absolutely adored him - he even used to come out with me in the car (in his basket in the front seat with the car roof down and the wind blowing through his whiskers)."

I absolutely love the thought of this!!! :)

"I'm smiling now thinking of him - definitley very irrational!!
Sorry waffling on but chin up - you're not alone (you've def made me feel more normal anyway!) xxx[/QUOTE]"

Then the tears were worthwhile last night. You're not irrational, and I considered bringing Toppy home with me but wasn't brave enough to suggest it.

Thanks for making me feel better, and also more normal!!! :)

RIP Max x x x
 
Ali27 said:
I still have tears in my eyes when I talk about my cat Inky who got run over 3 years ago however at the time I cried myself to sleep for several weeks! Just try and remember all the funny and happy moments. The song "have a little patience" is my favourite memory as I had just collected him from the airport after his flight vack from the US and that was playing as he was miaowing so very apt!
Very sadly, my cat Millie was diagnosed yesterday with a tumour in her mouth which is very likely to be malignant. We have been advised that is likely to have spread and surgery is not a good option especially as she is a real stress head. We have made the decision to keep her comfortable with pain relief for the next few weeks while she is still eating and going out and I am dreading making the descision to end her suffering! Lots more tears to come!
Remember that saying "it is better to have loved than not to have loved"! Thinking of you and of others who have lost their very much loved pets!
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Awwww I'm so sorry to hear about Millie. I don't know how I would have coped in that situation, but I think you're a fabulous owner for dealing with it so well.

RIP Inky - fancy a little cat travelling all that way. What a life he had. I'm sure he'll look after Millie when the time comes.

Thinking of you. x x x
 
Evelyn said:
Hugs to you ((((HUGS))))
My dear Poppy has been gone a few years now but I still get a catch in my throat when I think of her - she was almost 19yrs old and I'd found her wild on a farm at about 4wks. She had gummed up eyes and was a sorry mess. She grew into the most gorgeeous cat with attitude - I loved her unconditionally. I think of the fun times and smile that I had the chance to love her. I remember the times when she brought us all a mouse to play with - all fouor of them running around the living room! And the time when she pounced on a blackbird and missed then with great dignity that only cats can do walked through the lounge with 'You didn't see that did you' look on her face despite the black feather hanging out the corner of her mouth.
This is her doing her Sphinx impersonation
Poppy.jpg


I now have Catastrophe or Astro who is currently asleep on my forearms between me and the keyboard making it extremely hard to type
41AspinRoad010.jpg
Click to expand...

What stunning cats!!!!! Poppy looks like one of mine which went unexpectedly a few years ago (I used to have 4 - all brothers and sisters from one litter and I couldn't part with them!) - she seemed completely healthy and I came home one night and she was collapsed on the floor and had "lost" some black body fluid. She was alive (I sort of wished she wasn't) and we rang round for an out of hours vet (no luck) and RSPCA were useless.

She died 15 minutes later, thankfully to be honest. I hated her suffering, and missed her so much. But strangely not as much as Toppy. Toppy was the last of that litter and the runt when she was born. But such a little fighter.

Once (and I know I've told this story before, so I'm sorry!) I heard her fighting to get something in through the cat flap and KNEW she'd caught something.

I went into the kitchen to claim my present (:)) and guess what it was!!! A joint of roast beef!!! COOKED and WARM!!!! Even had string around it! I suspect she'd nicked it from a nearby bungalow that had the dining room in the conservatory and always keeps the patio doors open. We contemplated cutting the edges off and having it for lunch, but Toppy wouldn't give it up. So she ate well that day! :D:D:D

I love your comment about the blackbird - totally know that face!!! And Catastrophe is beautiful. Our new cat, Midnight, loves sleeping on the laptop keyboard. She did it the other day and turned the screen upside down. I had to google upside down to work out how to fix it!!

CATS!!! Now I remember why the tears are worth it. Thank you x x x
 
"Mum had thought he'd been a bit under the weather, took him to the vets who, during exploratory surgery, found he was riddled with tumours, so they decided it was kinder not to wake him up. :( It still kills me I didn't get to say goodbye. The day after I took the mare out for hack on my own and pretty much cried the whole time (glad it was the middle of a week day, cos anyone who met us woud've thought I was barmy), except when we cantered, then I let her go faster and faster until the wind swept my tears away and it felt like if we could just go fast enough I could leave my grief behind.

Sometimes I think of bereavement (because even if its 'just' a pet that's what it is) as tearing a hole in your heart; when it it first happens the tear is jagged and it catches and hurts. Eventually time smooths away the rough edges until you can look back down and remember the best memories without getting caught.

Hugs Redmone, it'll get better (I would say hug your new Kitty, but that sounds like it may end in a trip to A&E!)[/QUOTE]

Awwww that must have been awful. So sorry for your loss, especially in such a way. Your riding story makes me smile though. I can imagine that felt wonderful after what you'd been through.

Midnight (new cat) has had an awful start in life. She's only 1 (max) and was dumped on a PDSA center's doorstep at approx 5/6 months old pregnant, cold and starving. She had a litter of kittens, all of whom were rehomed, but it seems the experience didn't do her any good. She was rehomed twice and returned due to her being nasty! She has serious behaviour issues (getting better) and very mistrustful (especially around feet) and came with cat flu (she's probably a carrier and is kept in at the moment). She's now had all her jabs and a long course of antibiotics, and has been microchipped etc... she's actually getting quite friendly, but the problem is you can be stroking her and she's purring etc... and then attacks you out of the blue. But we all love her and are getting used to her. She's getting better and we're getting better at dodging! ;)

I love your analogy about having a hole in the heart. I hope the gap Toppy left will smooth over one day and I can remember her without being such an emotional mess! xxx
 
Geraldine said:
Cats are just ace. I have just the two now, Katie Pie Cat (is Suzie Pie Cat's sister) she is 15 this year and Billie Cat (Suzie Pie Cat's daughter) and she is 13 this year.

I keep saying I won't replace them when they leave but we all know that actually, I will, as the house will be empty without some fluff balls purring on your knee!
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I couldn't agree more. I think it's the fact that they choose to come and sit with you, makes you feel honoured!!!

I swore I wouldn't replace Toppy. She died the week before Christmas and I spent all of Christmas trying to find a cat's home that would rehome to me over the Christmas period. None would. We got Midnight about the 14th Jan - I saw her on a cats rehoming website and fell in love without even meeting her. I got the centre to reserve her for me. When we arrived to see her, she bit OH on the lip and then did a big snot filled sneeze down his face! The cat centre offered us other cats, but we had the feeling that this one had ran out of chances, and we brought her home anyway. We left there with their comment "call us on Monday if you want to bring her back". I recently sent them a photo of her happy in her new home.

Yes, a fortnight ago she bit me on the eye socket (bit close for comfort that one!) and me and OH now look like we self harm, but we love her and she IS improving!!! :)
 
Evelyn said:
I think that when they are taken from us without warning it is harder to deal with than when we make the final decision for them.

I had a lovely Cocker Spaniel - Pepper - who I loved so much - and he was run over in the farm driveway next door to my home he was almost 3yrs old. It still really hurts and I think of him often - it hurts more than when my other dogs have lived a full life and have been ready to go.

Same for Catastrophes sister Catalyst - she was poisoned by Antifreeze - courtesy of a nasty cat hating neighbour. I miss her too - she was only just 2 yrs old and a real character.

All my pets have been loved and mourned, even the pet mice - most are buried in my back garden and even though I've considered subdividing my place I can't bear the thought of them being dug up to lay pipes or something. I've planted tree roses over their graves - my favourite flowers.
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Stupid cat hating neighbours. I hope you got revenge!!! One of my neighbours did the "spikes on the fence" routine to try keep cats out (they did also fill their garden with little pebbles which really did resemble a giant litter tray - then they wonder why they poo in there!!) and OH ripped them out with plies and went potty at them!!!

RIP Catalyst. Fantastic names for your cats! x
 
gingerarab said:
Redmone I hope all these lovely stories of other people gorgeous much loved cats give you some joy at a very sad time. They have me. I say again, cats are very special xx
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Thanks Gingerarab.

It's helped lots.

Don't feel quite so silly or alone now. I'm not a particularly sociable creature myself, and don't share my grief or feelings very well. So this has made me feel lots better.

xxx
 
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