How many more am I going to break...?

Blythe Spirit

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Just feeling low....
In the last 5 years I have had 3 horses and despite them all being nice creatures and despite me not working them crazily hard I have now broken the third one....
horse number 1 - rode for 8 months going lovely though she was the horse of a lifetime loved her to bits then she suddenly started to have 'insane' moments and was diagnosed with ocd in both stifles and very bad kissing spines - I decided it was unfair to continue with her ridden career - I sold her on as an in hand showing horse - she was very well bred - but although she is now in a happy home the experiences she had between then and now mean I wish I had had her PTS
Horse number 2 - on loan to me for 3 years - going well got him jumping and hacking and doing dressage and he broke a leg in the field and after care and re-hab was returned to his owner (with bags of guilt) and is now a semi retired hacker.
Horse number 3 - had for a year, just started to do well dressage and got her jumping and then mystery lameness in hinds which may or may not be related to a fall she had in the field which I did not see. she was at vets for 4 weeks then 3 weeks on going re-hab at home - got the all clear to go on and start proper riding again and a week later she is showing the same signs (Poor canter, loss of balance and forwardness)
I just want a nice horse (and so many are nice) which won't tip me off often, does a little bit of everything and won't break - guess I should buy a rocking horse! But seriously I loved and enjoyed training all these horses and its so heartbreaking when they break and so hard to know what to do for the best when they do .... already spent twice the purchase price of current mare on vets bills and more to come (she is insured) - but its not about the money its about the emotional investment we make in our horses ....
Ok winge over back to normal service
 
thanks :) yes I know its all part of the things that happen with horses but I guess I got spoiled because the two horses I had before these three were both types that the vet only saw once a year - and both worked into their 20's happily (one is still going as my Dad's old but happy hacker). but now the vet's receptionist even knows my voice on the phone ...
 
Sometimes it just happens. I'd never had a problem with a pony. Then we bought a horse, hadn't had her two weeks before she did herself an injury that could well have been terminal. We bought a stand in, had him a couple of months and he too managed to injure himself so badly that the vet suggested pts. From having several sound as a pound ponies I went to having two big horses on long term box rest in three months.
 
My horse is recovering from stifle surgery, we are 7 weeks post op and he just got out in the field. They found middle of the road cartilage damage, reasonable odds of returning to full work including jumping, but reasonable odds that he wont. He is truly my horse of a lifetime, I love him to pieces but cant shake the feeling of being completely robbed of the future we were supposed to have together, we might have that future, but it will always be uncertain. It's all part and parcel of horse ownership, probably why so many people end up with more than one, and many have field ornaments. No matter how much we love them even when they are broken... we still have the passion to ride and achieve things! The emotional side is the hardest bit!
 
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