how to boost confidence riding???

biggingerpony

biggingerpony

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Hiya - ive had a bit of a confidence knock.. I'm generally fine on my horse. Shes 21 and semi retired and we just go for a hack a couple of times a week.

I'm going to be looking next year fot a new horse i want to get back competing. ive been trying to ride different horses to get my confidence up. In the school im fine - yes my schooling is not very good but im having riding lessons to sort that out. Its when i hack out i get very nervous - i get this irrational fear that the horse is going to bolt and im not going to be able to stop. I think added to that is its not my horse and would feel devastated if anything would happen. I tried hacking out with a friend today and she pushed me way out my comfort zone and i freaked out a bit! I feel so stupid and fustrated i want to improve my riding but i dont seem to be getting anywhere. Most of the time the horse can tell im nervous and takes the p%ss even more. Its a bit of a vicious cycle.

Is there anyway i can stop myself being such a nervous nelly? :-(
 
I sympathise with you, it's a horrible feeling. Have you ever been bolted with before? I'm just wondering what's made you lose confidence. I think as long as you're in control in the school and confident with your downward transitions there's no reason why you shouldn't be reasonably in control on a hack. What works for me when I feel nervous is taking slow, deep breaths. When you get oxygen into your system your heart rate slows down automatically. Also try smiling when you start to feel the first 'twinge.' I totally feel for you though as I'm also prone to nerves!
 
Hi MaggieStar thank you. I think I'm just a bit of a wimp.. I've been bombed off with many times but never truly bolted. I think its more of a fear of me coming off and the horse coming to harm especially when its not mine. I have booked an emergency riding lesson for tomorrow - and am also going to ride my own who I'm fine on. Grrr it's so fustrating :(
 
Confidence is easily knocked, everyone has lost their confidence over something at least once.

Sop worrying about it. If a horse is going to bolt, no special bit, no special harness is going to stop it. Face up to that and you will have conquered a large chunk of your fear.

To actually get over the fear, you need to prepare yourself for unpredictable situations. What if the horse DID bolt? What would you do?

You need to realise that a horse wil only bolt if it fears for its life. What has it to fear? It is hacking in familiar territory, it has a rider who probably isn't giving it the best vibes but that's nothing to lose its life over, so really... The worst that can happen is that horse takes over being boss and dictates your ride.

Are you going to LET that happen? You're the one who wants to hack and ride so, take responsibility and ride like you mean it. The horse will respect a rider who knows what they are doing and has a plan.

So, start of bit by bit and PLAN your ride. Go for a short one, say half an hour. Plan little "activities" as you go along. E.g. You will ask for a shoulder in at the end of xxx street. You will ask for a rein back at xxxxx's house. At the bottom of the hill, you will ask for six strides of trot and then walk. At the top of the hill you will ask for a square halt. Then you will reward the horse by asking for walk on a long rein for 1 minute.

Build on the above plan and slowly, you will forget thinking about the horse bolting and you will only think about what you will do on the hack. Plan every hack like its a a training session. Put in as many activities as you like and soon you will be confidently hacking out together like partners.
 
Tallyho! Thank you so much I need a kick up the backside, I think your right, keeping the ride short to begin with is a good idea is a good idea. I think sometimes I try and do too much to soon and I go back a few steps.

I know my fear is completely irrational - it is just the whole 'what if' scenario that rushes through my head.

I have booked in a few lessons at a well respected RS and will try and improve by pushing myself slowly. Lunge lessons/without stirrup work I think will be pretty invaluable. And then I will try Tallyho's idea.
 
Good luck and most of all, enjoy it! Riding is a real pleasure and if its what you enjoy, then nothing beats that feeling.

I agree, lunge lessons with no stirrups, anything to get your seat secure will help enormously. Have you read Sylvia Lochs The Classical Seat? I recommend reading it to give you more confidence. Once you have a secure seat, and are balanced, you can handle pretty much anything a horse throws at you.
 
Hi OP

I am also in this position at the moment. I am nervous in the school as my horse spooked and bronked me off in there twice in the last couple of months but it has also made me nervous on hacks as I imagine what happened in the school wil happen out there too. I have been having lots of lessons which is helping and i always try to hack with a sensible friend - she has an older horse so is happy to go at my pace - I try to have in my head where we are going to go before we go out and I break it down into stages like "We are quarter way round and all is ok"... "we are halfway and all is ok" - you get the idea... I like Tally ho's suggestion too.. Good luck
 
Biggingerpony, it's not really an irrational fear, in a sense; one of the dangers we all face hacking out is not being able to control the horse for some reason.
As others have said, there are ways of dealing with it, and many of us (myself included) have been through it. My fear was of getting dragged, so I changed over to safety stirrups for hacking out, and that helped me a lot.
Also, the step by step approach will build confidence. Start with a small hack, when the horse is settled and going calmly, then grow it fro there. Best of luck!
 
I have this problem too but not with hacking with others. It's going on our own that is scaring me as we have a very busy road right outside our yard we have to ride on before we get to the bridle paths and even though my horse is bombproof with other horses on her own she is spooky in a big way and I have established its my nerves she is probably picking up on. So going to start building slowly and having someone on foot with me to talk to and make me feel safer. I find that schooling first where I am confident helps before a hack because then I know I have her attention and that relaxes me. Also tally ho's idea about doing little training exercises is great and I am going to try that one tomorrow :)
 
Hello all, thank you sooo much for all your kind comments I feel much better now :)

I think I have been totally spoilt with my old girl she has her moments of prancing around but I know its all for show and she's trying to do her best to be scary but she won't actually do anything.

I just need to get used to riding loads more horses to build up my confidence slowly. Hopefully by the autumn I'll be better. I'm looking forward to my emergency riding lesson tomorrow :)
 
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