How to convince friend a stallion is a bad idea?

HappyHollyDays

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we have this weird thing in the UK where we teach everyone that stallions are these fire breathing dangerous dragons... in Europe they stick their toddlers on them.

This in bucket loads. German friend uses both her stallions in lessons and the children handle them under supervision until they are deemed competent enough to deal with them alone. They are both stabled next to mares and the kids learn from an early age to be confident around them.
 

Renvers

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This in bucket loads. German friend uses both her stallions in lessons and the children handle them under supervision until they are deemed competent enough to deal with them alone. They are both stabled next to mares and the kids learn from an early age to be confident around them.

Completely agree.

I have always found stallions to be easy to do. I have even known of stallions on livery yards and they have been fine. The mares tend to be more of a problem if there is a stallion around.

OP if you friend has her own place and is an experienced horse owner she should be fine, if you are anxious about the expectation on you maybe you can talk to the current owners about some guidance on handling stalllions and spend some time with them?
 

Gloi

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Pretty sure a mate is using an approved stallion in Yorkshire, she’s done an awful lot of research on him.
There are also a lot of owners of other breeds that like a Friesian cross. I kept ponies in the past at a stud that had two and only covered other breeds as there weren't many around then. Sadly one had the aortic problem some Friesians do and dropped dead at 4.
 

Gloi

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We are both inexperienced with stallions. I also went along with her to see the horse since she wanted to convince/reassure me, ? but I still don't feel good about it. I want her to have what she wants, but I also want her to be safe. She's a very close friend. Everything I've heard about stallions is that even the well-trained, docile ones can be dangerous (I know you can say that of all horses) and that only people who are thoroughly experienced with them, want them for breeding or showing and accept the risk should own them. This is what my riding instructor and the owner of the stables I was taught at taught me.

You accept you have no experience of them and the stable owner may not have either though a section C stallion was used in lessons at a riding school I went to as a kid. Why not spend a bit of time where this horse currently lives to get some experience if they will let you.
 

scruffyponies

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I don't think anyone is qualified to give much of an opinion on the basis of "I have heard".

I have owned 5 stallions, kept in the same field with geldings.
Still have two, and one of them went to a fun ride with a 9 year old child on board yesterday. The only thing that gave him away was his habit of chuntering hello to other horses under his breath as they pass.

Temperament and how you keep them make all the difference. Many are sweeties in the right hands and if properly socialised.
Your friend needs to ask lots of questions of people who have experience and can give qualified advice. They won't necessarily tell her no, but they will give her some things to think about.
 

ownedbyaconnie

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You've raised your concerns (which are based on hearsay and not experience) all you can do now is let your friend who is an adult (I am assuming) make her decision. You are within your right to say you don't feel comfortable sorting her horses in the future if she gets this stallion. There is a horse on the yard that i have refused to help with since being pregnant because I will not take the extra risk anymore.

However, bear in mind that mares are "entire" same as stallions. I'm sure you wouldn't think twice about your friend getting a mare.

I've no experience of keeping stallions but her set up sounds pretty good. I would be more worried about him reacting to the gelding if there was a mare nearby.
 

paddy555

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Still have two, and one of them went to a fun ride with a 9 year old child on board yesterday. The only thing that gave him away was his habit of chuntering hello to other horses under his breath as they pass.

.

mine chunters all the time. If I am late with his feed, if I bring his feed, if I catch him, walk past him and that is before we even go out. He talks constantly to my other horses. Never screams always that sweet little chunter. :D
 

ihatework

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Having worked around a number of stallions then all I can say is you can’t make generalisations. Some you wouldn’t know were stallions unless you looked for their nuts (complete dolls), a small handful were tricky and needed careful management and handling, most fell somewhere in between - nice tempered horses that were easy to do provided correctly managed.

So this will really fall down to the individual stallion and how well set up your friend is. As they have their own property it’s not a completely crazy idea but at the same time I suspect life for her will be a lot easier with a gelding!! The main thing to think about is how she will manage in situations where she has no control of what people around her are doing, I.e at shows etc. That is where you need to be really switched on, even with the good boys!
 

Hexx

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At one point we had 4 stallions on our livery yard: 1 x Welsh D, 1 x Arab, 1 x warmblood and 1 x Andalusian. All very different types of horse with their own particular personality traits.

The were ridden and handled regularly by the yard staff, owners and sometimes other liveries and they really were no trouble to the point where they just got to be known as the "shouty ones"! They were turned out next to mares, even the one that regularly covered - he wasn't an issue until he got his covering bridle on and then he was off!

If she knows what she's doing, has the set up for it and takes into account people's prejudices against stallions, then I don't see the problem.
 

Nicnac

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Pretty sure a mate is using an approved stallion in Yorkshire, she’s done an awful lot of research on him.

Not according to FHAGBI - the GB Friesian society:

Approved stallions
Approved stallions, also known as Studbook (Stb) stallions, are Friesian stallions of exceptional breeding and quality that have passed the strict selection criteria of the KFPS which includes veterinary examinations, gradings and performance tests. Approved stallions are officially approved for breeding and entered into the main KFPS Studbook.
Once they have been approved, stallions are given a new name by the KFPS and a numerical suffix, for example; Beart 411, Norbert 444, Walt 487.
Please note, there are currently NO STALLIONS IN THE UK APPROVED FOR BREEDING!
 

cowgirl16

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Some of the nicest, most respectful and well mannered horses I've worked with in the past have been stallions. The most dangerous one I've ever had to deal with was a gelding.
 

zandp

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My friend's stallion was a darling, he used to hack out with me and my mare and we'd school together, no issues at all, although my RI at the time was a bit concerned when we rode to the school one day and he saw the stallion in there. He was kept in a field by himself, but with geldings around him and often mares opposite, he was stabled alongside mostly geldings but there was a mare a couple of stables away. He was also used to cover horses. Never an issue with him. He was even an angel with 6 months box rest after he broke a shoulder and injured himself going through a lot of fencing when out overnight in a storm. He was at the vets for 4 months and then home for 2 months - still perfect behaviour.
 

Tiddlypom

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I also look after her horses when she's away (she looks after mine when I'm away), and don't feel good about continuing to do so if she has a stallion.
So this is the crux of the problem, it's not about whether your friend has the facilities to look after a stallion. You would not be happy about looking after your friend's stallion when she is away, and why should you be?

No one should be asked care for or look after a horse that they are nervous of. Your friend needs to find someone else to look after her horse when she is away.
 

Leandy

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Its really up to your friend whether she thinks this is the horse for her. I don't see anything in your description of her plans which makes this an obviously bad decision for her to make. If you are not happy around the horse then that is also up to you but if she relies on you for cover for her horses when she is away then you will need to tell her if you are not happy around this one. Personally, I wouldn't be making any such decision until I actually knew the particular horse concerned.
 

Birker2020

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We have one on our yard and he is lovely, very kind and docile. He got stuck in his rug the other morning and let me rescue him without fuss, with ears forward and nuzzling me gently. I must admit I've always had a fear of stallions but know of geldings who are much nastier.
 

Esmae

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One of my boys turned out with a gelding every day of his life without problem to either horse. I think you are worrying over much honestly.
 
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OP, if your friend has her own place or a suitable place to keep a stallion, I see no issue. I have friends who have stallions in the UK, all are easy to handle and lovely, you just wouldn’t know unless you spot their bits! They’re all handled and ridden by children too.

so many people keep stallions over here, it’s very normal and I would have no issue having one (if I didn’t have my mare).
 

Pinkvboots

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It sounds like she has a good place at home to accommodate a stallion and most of the stallions I have known have been fine, I have known the odd colt to be stroppy but they usually got gelded if they didn't improve.
 

The Jokers Girl

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After reading this post I fail to see how it affects the OP. A friend of hers is buying a horse, albeit stallion, but aren't all mares entire?, to keep on her own land and enjoy for herself. OP is down on stallions as she has heard this, and heard that about them but never had anything to do with them.
OP you need to back off and not try and rally the HHO masses (which hasn't worked) to try and convince your friend what she is doing is stupid idea. Just because you are maybe jealous, scared of certain horses etc, whatever the genuine reason may be.
As others have said it is only really in UK where we get hung up on big bad stallions, in Europe they are routinely used and I believe in the US too on ranches, riding schools etc.
When I was in Mauritius they had 2 ex racer stallions at the hotel I got married in. I rode both, one was older, in his 20s the other had been off the track 6 weeks and after seeing me ride and me boring them senseless with videos of my own horse I rode both, (I was actually the first none staff member to ride the 6 week off the track stallion) they were kept in an air conditioned barn with mares. I took him to the beach in company of mares they were all foot perfect, if not a bit quicker than what I was used to.
My old yard owner and her partner have a driving stallion that goes on drives with mares and has even been driven in a pair with a mare, done breed showing classes with mares, never an issue.

I appreciate I have rambled but when novices, nervous riders slate everything as they can't see the bigger picture and lack experience it makes me a little cross.
I would highly recommend you broaden your horizons OP and get some more experience and leave your friend to enjoy her horses on her land.
 
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Regandal

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After reading this post I fail to see how it affects the OP. A friend of hers is buying a horse, albeit stallion, but aren't all mares entire?, to keep on her own land and enjoy for herself. OP is down on stallions as she has heard this, and heard that about them but never had anything to do with them.
OP you need to back off and not try and rally the HHO masses (which hasn't worked) to try and convince your friend what she is doing is stupid idea. Just because you are maybe jealous, scared of certain horses etc, whatever the genuine reason may be.
As others have said it is only really in UK where we get hung up on big bad stallions, in Europe they are routinely used and I believe in the US too on ranches, riding schools etc.
When I was in Mauritius they had 2 ex racer stallions at the hotel I got married in. I rode both, one was older, in his 20s the other had been off the track 6 weeks and after seeing me ride and me boring them senseless with videos of my own horse I rode both, (I was actually the first none staff member to ride the 6 week off the track stallion) they were kept in an air conditioned barn with mares. I took him to the beach in company of mares they were all foot perfect, if not a bit quicker than what I was used to.
My old yard owner and her partner have a driving stallion that goes on drives with mares and has even been driven in a pair with a mare, done breed showing classes with mares, never an issue.

I appreciate I have rambled but when novices, nervous riders slate everything as they can't see the bigger picturitand lack experience it makes me a little cross.
I would highly recommend you broaden your horizons OP and get some more experience and leave your friend to enjoy her horses on her land.

The problem is, the OP will be expected to deal with it when her friend is on holiday. Doesn’t matter why she’s wary, it shouldn’t be expected of her.
 
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OP, perhaps reserve judgement until your friend has the stallion at home. You can then decide if you are able to do holiday cover for her. I think if you explained to your friend that you are wary, then they would make sure you were comfortable handling it, or they know they will just have to find someone else to look after it.
 

paddy555

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After reading this post I fail to see how it affects the OP. A friend of hers is buying a horse, albeit stallion, but aren't all mares entire?, to keep on her own land and enjoy for herself. OP is down on stallions as she has heard this, and heard that about them but never had anything to do with them.
OP you need to back off and not try and rally the HHO masses (which hasn't worked) to try and convince your friend what she is doing is stupid idea. Just because you are maybe jealous, scared of certain horses etc, whatever the genuine reason may be.
As others have said it is only really in UK where we get hung up on big bad stallions, in Europe they are routinely used and I believe in the US too on ranches, riding schools etc.
When I was in Mauritius they had 2 ex racer stallions at the hotel I got married in. I rode both, one was older, in his 20s the other had been off the track 6 weeks and after seeing me ride and me boring them senseless with videos of my own horse I rode both, (I was actually the first none staff member to ride the 6 week off the track stallion) they were kept in an air conditioned barn with mares. I took him to the beach in company of mares they were all foot perfect, if not a bit quicker than what I was used to.
My old yard owner and her partner have a driving stallion that goes on drives with mares and has even been driven in a pair with a mare, done breed showing classes with mares, never an issue.

I appreciate I have rambled but when novices, nervous riders slate everything as they can't see the bigger picture and lack experience it makes me a little cross.
I would highly recommend you broaden your horizons OP and get some more experience and leave your friend to enjoy her horses on her land.

people are scared of the unknown. It is no use being cross with them. I don't see it as rallying the HHO masses but more of airing her thoughts and getting some feedback. Hopefully she has learnt that quite a few of us either have or have worked with stallions and not only have we all survived many of us actually like them. A lot!

Hopefully the friend will get her stallion and OP will learn from being with him that far from being a terrifying monster whose only aim in life is to kill her he is very probably a big black hairy softy. As she watches her friend constantly handling him she will realise that looking after him is not really going to be the problem that she thought it was. I hope it works out for them.
 

Renvers

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Roughly 50% of horses are born to be stallions, in Spain they see no reason to geld just because a foal is a colt. The general rule there is that men ride stallions, women ride mares. On hacks stallions go in front, mares behind.

Everybody is wary of geldings, why? Because the colt must have misbehaved at some stage.

Will bear that in mind if I ever consider buying a PRE gelding ;)
 
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